November 3, 2004


My mother, bless her, is not so hot with email. Which is surprising given that she's a speech therapist and teacher. She types in all caps, not realizing its a little rude, and she uses all kinds of punctuation marks and random characters that don't really make a lot of sense. So, can you imagine the email she sent out to everyone she knows this morning concerning her feelings about the presidential election? You need not imagine.

To: Everyone On The Planet
From: Mom
Sent: Wed 11/3/2004 7:36 AM
Subject: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????????????????***********************

WOE IS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I might have put it a little differently but I can't disagree with the sentiment behind it. I'm going to start a petition whereby members of the losing party get to crawl back into bed the day after the election. Not that I'm conceding. I just don't feel overly optimistic.

Fucking Ohio.

Posted by Chris at November 3, 2004 8:37 AM

Fucking Ohio is right. I knew there was a reason I fled that place at an early age and never looked back. DAMMIT! Anyone wanna buy a house with a pretty purple bathroom? I'll make you a deal .. just so long as I have enough money to get to Canada.

Posted by: LOUP at November 3, 2004 8:40 AM

I'm so furious with the idiots who voted Republican I can't stand it. Words fail me. *Mommy*. I need a hug. I'm stunned into numbness.

Posted by: Pixie at November 3, 2004 8:44 AM

Fucking Ohio? Yeah, but lets talk about the fucking young voters who were supposed to show up and evidently didn't. The CNN ticker indicates that P. Diddy's crowd was all hat and no cattle...

Posted by: Casey at November 3, 2004 9:04 AM

Fucking P. Diddy!

Posted by: Stacey at November 3, 2004 9:05 AM

I'm with Mom... woe is me...

Posted by: debby at November 3, 2004 9:10 AM

Fucking Ohio indeed. What on EARTH do people see in Bush? Apparently this country is war-happy and it's not going to stop until our whole country is dead in Iraq. Stupid!!!!

That's it - I'm too ashamed to live here anymore.

I'm moving to Australia.

Posted by: Dawn (webmiztris) at November 3, 2004 9:17 AM

the lyrics to 'Ohio' keep running through my head -

I can't express how disappointed I feel. Or how much I cried last night. It's so hard to know that so many of us are aching for change, but evidently? others are okay with where we are. How is that possible?

Posted by: lady jane at November 3, 2004 9:18 AM

I just freaking knew it! WTF bunch of burger-bellied narrowminded blindfolded ass-clowns...uh, Republicans.

Posted by: Geezitron at November 3, 2004 9:18 AM

How ashamed and embarassed I am to be living in this godforsaken state of Ohio. I have lived here almost two years and I hate it more everyday. My home is Pennsylvania, they made me proud. Blah.

Posted by: jujubee at November 3, 2004 9:29 AM

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::I'm with your mom --- ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Posted by: Bob at November 3, 2004 9:33 AM

But haven't you heard? *Obnoxious giggle*
Ohio is like, the new Florida!

I say? Someone needs to go to jail. This is unexceptable.

Posted by: RockStar Mommy at November 3, 2004 9:39 AM

fucking everyone. what is wrong with people??????

Posted by: laura at November 3, 2004 9:49 AM

Who would have thought Ohio would have turned out to be the Florida of 2000? I say we need to do two things immediately. #1, cut Florida off from the rest of the US and let it float off into the Carribean since it's all p*nis shaped, and we don't really need a p*enis shaped state attached to the rest of the US anyways. And number two, since Ohio has stupid cities in it like Dublin that wastes money building stupid concrete corn fields, oh and no two corn are alike, I say we just concrete all of Ohio, even Columbus, which I love, but they're a part of Ohio and must pay the price, and let the kids use it as the world's largest skate park. Grrrrrrrness already!

Posted by: charm at November 3, 2004 9:49 AM

Your mom is right. Shit, Ohio can kiss my ass if they think they'll be seeing me at their Rock and Roll Hall of Fame anytime soon.

And also? I've got to tell you that I am floored at the amount of "red" on the map of which state when what way. I had no idea that there were that many Bush lovers out there. Up here in Canada it seems ludacris that people could stand behind that man and his stance on things.

Oh well, I guess I'll be opening up my backyard for people escaping the insanity.

Posted by: Kimmer at November 3, 2004 9:56 AM

Which begs the question...what is more annoying? The folks whose emails are in all caps or rampant with spelling errors, or those people who only seem to exist in cyber space to flood my inbox with 101 ways to know if I truly was a child of the 80's?

Posted by: Janet at November 3, 2004 10:00 AM

WOE IS ME!!!!! for sure.

Posted by: zalary at November 3, 2004 10:13 AM

words fail.

Posted by: rachel at November 3, 2004 10:41 AM

oh, and kimmer - i know it looks like a lot of red, but a lot of those states are very large (size-wise) but also sparsely-populated. note that some of the largest states in the union (california and texas notwithstanding) have some of the fewest votes.

Posted by: rachel at November 3, 2004 10:46 AM

I am just so sad. So, so sad. The whole thing is sad. What a letdown.

Posted by: supine at November 3, 2004 11:20 AM

Please don't confuse Cleveland with the rest of the state of Ohio...I was born and raised there, and my whole life people have asked me where I'm from...when I say Cleveland, they say Ohio? I would say, no I know why. Cuyahoga county, which houses Cleveland, is blue on the map....the rest of the state can suck it.

Posted by: Mike at November 3, 2004 11:29 AM

Thanks for pointing that out Mike. Then I say we concrete all of Ohio, with the exception of Cleveland, since I also have a lovely friend who lives in Cleveland.

Posted by: charm at November 3, 2004 11:33 AM


Posted by: Sue at November 3, 2004 11:35 AM

I've got a nice welt on my forehead from beating it against the TV this morning. Woe is me too.

What's that Liz Phair lyric -
Cinco de Mayo.
Burn-out, Ohio.
It wasn't me this time, letting you go.

Posted by: Jenny at November 3, 2004 11:46 AM

Fuck Ohio, for real. I can't even articulate how I feel right now, but I know you all understand. There's this great little town in Mexico, though, that is looking better and better.....

Posted by: Heather at November 3, 2004 11:51 AM

The thing is, this is like when one football team wins the game on a last second field goal.

It should never have been this close in the first place.

It ain't Ohio's fault, y'all. Or Florida. We've got over 100 million voters, and it came down to the last state to finish counting.

What's up with that?

CLEARLY, a bunch of people are just peachy-keen with how things are going.

Me? I'm getting very, very depressed.

Posted by: ben at November 3, 2004 11:57 AM

Awwww :) I didn't really have a favorite in this election. I know Bush fucked up, but I don't know if Kerry wouldn't do the same. However, I'm a bit afraid that the republicans might get a bit to powerful now they're also in Senat and the House of rep. If I said that correct :)

What I thought was really good this election that there were 10% more voters. That's awesome.

Posted by: Sweety at November 3, 2004 11:58 AM

I'm right there with your mom. WOE!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Martha at November 3, 2004 12:16 PM

I'm scared, Chris!

Posted by: Rockchild at November 3, 2004 12:17 PM

Well I guess that Redskins tradition of predicting presidents is over. There should be a fuck Ohio and fuck the Bible Belt movement.

Posted by: Carla at November 3, 2004 12:23 PM

If the train is broken, it really doesn't matter who the conductor is. :(

Posted by: Jon in Michigan at November 3, 2004 12:44 PM

Well Chris, I am not that unhappy about the election. I think it was a wake up call to the Democrats that if you shift too far to the left the middle will not follow. Note, Clinton had a lot of Republican swing voters, Kerry did not. There is a lesson to be learned there. The new senator from Illinois summed it up best. We need to find the middle and figure out how to serve them to close the divide in this country.

I don't like Bush but I did not vote for Kerry. If the democrats had put up a better candidate I would have probably voted for him.

Posted by: goodsnake at November 3, 2004 1:09 PM

I am from that great state, and I also voted Bush. I think what you meant to say was Ohio fucking RULES!

Posted by: Kera at November 3, 2004 1:36 PM


Seriously though, I'm not so keen on Georgie being my president again, either. I didn't vote for his incompetent ass. I would much rather see his dog in office, or how about his wife? She's pretty cool.

Posted by: zanie at November 3, 2004 1:45 PM

The West Coast, Hawaii, Upper Midwest and North East should succeed.

Clearly we are the only ones in our right, oh I mean LEFT minds.

*&^%$&()&%$ I cannot BELIEVE THIS?!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: amy at November 3, 2004 2:06 PM

I have so much to say and yet I just can't even begin. I'm sitting here listening to Kerry's concession speech. Geez it feels like a funeral to me.

Fucking Ohio is right. All those fucking swing states/battleground states irritate me to no end. Ohioda and Pennsaconsin as they said last night on The Daily Show.

WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THE FACT THAT KERRY WON DC BY 90%! Because those of us who have to live down the street from the bastard haven't been fooled.

Posted by: Heather at November 3, 2004 2:15 PM

[i]The West Coast, Hawaii, Upper Midwest and North East should succeed.

Clearly we are the only ones in our right, oh I mean LEFT minds.

*&^%$&()&%$ I cannot BELIEVE THIS?!!!!!!!!![/i]

Go for it. Please. The rest of us can be libertarian, and leave each other the hell alone.

Posted by: Tami at November 3, 2004 3:06 PM

ugh. Sucks, but I'm really not going to get too ticked off about it, unless things get even worse than they already are, because it's kinda "SSDD" right now. but i'm not very political. at least we don't have to worry about getting him for 4 MORE years after this term. *g*

Posted by: Manda at November 3, 2004 4:04 PM

You know, even up here in Canada we're sad as heck. Because being next to America is like being in bed with an elephant. When the elephant rolls over, who gets squished? And now this Elephant has BUSH stickers all over its ass.

I think John G. Diefenbaker was the 1st to use the "elephant" line.

Anyhoo, all my American-resident firends, you are welcome to move to Canada. Being beside the elephant is still probably better than being under it.

Posted by: Shiz at November 3, 2004 4:19 PM

Fucking Ohio! And the while I'm at it, fuck the south too! I like your idea, crawl back into bed. But, can I add to that and bring a couple of Margaritas and some chocolate to bed with me too? I need my comfort foods.

Posted by: Nicole at November 3, 2004 4:25 PM

Fuck Ohio? Poor Ohio. Let's give credit where credit is due. Fuck the whole fucking conservative-ass, redneck, cocksucking South. Here I am surrounded by goat-roping pigfuckers. While we're at it, fuck Texas in it's big ole homophobic ass and all the square-ish states too.


Anybody in the Northwest or Northeast got a couch me and The Geek can sleep on for awhile?

Posted by: gesikah at November 3, 2004 4:49 PM

Fuck fuck fuck fuckedity fuck!

Well, the only thing good about it is that I am going to get my blog up and running again because of it.

Posted by: Dawn at November 3, 2004 5:09 PM

I live in Austin, TX and we did what we could here. Travis County was 56 percent for John Kerry and the rest of Texas was 61% for that bow-legged smirking liar.

Posted by: Cindy at November 3, 2004 5:17 PM

Yea, I second that thought. Fucking Ohio. And as far as your mom's email is concerned....GO CACTUS MOM! nice.

Posted by: Jade at November 3, 2004 6:24 PM

I *heart* moms who curse.

At least your mom emails. Mine doesn't even know how to turn on a computer. On 2nd thought...maybe that's a good thing. Less chance to find my blog that way.

Posted by: patricia at November 3, 2004 11:32 PM

I'm from Ohio, and I have to agree with your mom. I'm so sad and disappointed in this state, b/c of the Presidential race, but also because voters in this state overwhelmingly chose to pass Issue 1, which makes marriage only legal between a man and woman, and also denies partner benefits to any couple, regardless of sexual orientation.

I weep, and am planning my move to a hippie state. Vermont, perhaps?

Posted by: Nikki at November 4, 2004 1:35 AM