January 7, 2005


If you're new here, I think there are a few things you should know. Know that I'm a flaming liberal, of the bleeding heart variety. Know that I'm open minded as well. I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinions, to worship their own god, express their own opinions and determine their own values. Far be it from me to impose my values on others. I don't agree with the war in Iraq - not one stinkin' bit. And I don't appreciate the current political climate which seems to call into question one's patriotism if they don't support the administration or the war. What disturbs me more is the implication that those of us who don't support the war don't support the troops. I remain a patriotic person and my support for those in uniform remains steadfast and unwavering. You can disagree with my politics but please don't question my patriotism. What am I getting at with all this? My thoughts on an old friend who I just found out joined the Army.

you stupid bastard what the fuck do you think you're doing because this isn't like the time you just wanted to go out and buy a motorcycle and then got bored with it and wished you hadn't I know that you've never found a career, anything you really loved and I know you've got some motivational issues I remember all the times we skipped class in college because we'd just had too fucking much to drink or really couldn't be bothered to get up on time and go but what the hell made you think this was a good idea you're going to be flown over water and dropped in a desert and shot at and you can't really blame them for shooting at us can you because we really just came in and started blowing shit up for no apparent reason and I realize that I'm being really fucking selfish here and insinuating my political beliefs through every consonant and vowel that spins its way through my idealistic brain but you're going to get shot at and I don't want any of my friends to die not for this not for something that I have so little respect for not for anything so you better fucking learn to shoot and let me know where to send some armor plating because I know you're not going to have enough of that and just...well just keep your damn head down...just keep your fucking head down cos this is real and this is life and the alternative ain't great and just keep your fucking head down because I can think of better ways to go than bleeding in the desert...for what?

Posted by Chris at January 7, 2005 2:28 PM

Tell your friend he's better off coming to Arizona if he wants to see the desert. At least it's rather tranquill here...
And we've got the BEST sunsets...
Dayum...it's sad.

Posted by: Jade at January 7, 2005 2:40 PM

yeah, I can agree with all of that.

two of my brothers-in-law are going over there. drives me mad.

Posted by: Dawn (webmiztris) at January 7, 2005 2:42 PM

yeah, I can agree with all that too.

And don't you love how AL Jazeera is accusing the U.S. of causing the Tsunami by testing nukes underwater?

Posted by: amy at January 7, 2005 2:45 PM

I completely agree. My husband (fiance at the time) unexpectedly joined one day and I cried screamed fought and 4 years later convinced him not to resign.

However, I will say my son will never sign...I will fight that tooth and nail. Period

Posted by: judy at January 7, 2005 2:45 PM

Regardless of what YOUR opinion on the war is, your friend has already joined. It's pretty much set in stone. All you can do is support him. He's going to need it.

Posted by: Kera at January 7, 2005 2:52 PM

Okay, breathe with me. In.... Out.... In... Out...


Posted by: pie at January 7, 2005 3:01 PM

i'm so sorry to hear that, Chris. if it's any consolation... your friend will most likely be in training for quite a while (depending on whether or not he's ever been enlisted before)... so maybe he'll miss going to war??? maybe?? yeah... unfortunately i don't really see that happening either... =( but stay positive... things will be ok.

Posted by: Judy at January 7, 2005 3:27 PM

First reaction? Wow . . . Second reaction? I'm sorry, hun. =(

Posted by: Jennie at January 7, 2005 3:35 PM

I cannot say I have the same political beliefs as you, but I certainly have my reservations about the situation in Iraq. At this point all you can do, other than so eloquently expressing your opinion, is to support him any way you can...and pray! I have some friends that have spent time in the military. The most combat they have seen was the occupation of a "liberated" Granada. I have to say, as long he comes home safely, he should be a stronger, more responsible guy.

I still think he is NUTS though.

Posted by: Dave at January 7, 2005 4:02 PM

I actually became a bleeding heart liberal while I was a military wife (I considered myself conservative before then), and nothing pisses me off more than when people act as if liberalism and patriotism are mutually exclusive. All the guys in my family were in the military and I even considered joining once myself, so I don't want to hear crap about about me not supporting the troops. I have more reasons to love the guys in uniform than most do.

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. It scares the bejesus out of you, doesn't it? My brother-in-law is in the Marines and is about to go to Iraq for the 3rd time. Time for another bout of fear as I wonder if he'll come back to my sister and their kids alive...

Posted by: Spring at January 7, 2005 5:08 PM

I'm sorry honey. I hope he'll be ok.

Posted by: Heather at January 7, 2005 5:10 PM

Having someone in the military during this is nerve-wracking to see the least. I, too, disagree with this war. I also have a friend in Iraq right now. Perhaps your friend felt this was something that would help shape his life into something he couldn't find before. At this point the best you can do is pray for him (if you believe in that) and give him your support. He will definitely need it.

I certainly understand your need to vent. I think the guy is crazy!

Posted by: tone at January 7, 2005 5:25 PM

Amen, we too just found out a friend is going to Afghanistan to be a body guard, he is an ex-Marine. So sad. My thoughts exactly.

Posted by: Jazzy at January 7, 2005 5:37 PM

Oh, Chris. I hear you and I'm right there with you on this.

Posted by: Jenny at January 7, 2005 5:39 PM

I'm really sorry to hear about your friend and that you're hurt and worried for him. Given everthing that has arisen and failed to be proved since the war started, I completely understand as I've got a couple of cousins there right now. But maybe this is something he feels he needs to do and he can make a difference. For myself, I have Iraqi friends who support the war because of what they and their families have been through, but on the other hand I'd like to kick Bush in the nuts for how this whole thing has been handled. And I'm pretty certain that if I didn't have a little guy, I'd want to do anything I can over there to help rebuild. I don't have to agree with Bush and his cronies to want to help rebuild what's been destroyed, or help give the Iraqis alive today something they've never known. Maybe your friend feels similar.

Posted by: groovebunny at January 7, 2005 5:46 PM

I feel your pain. A son of a client of mine has joined. Please understand that my clients are also my friends many of them, so I felt her pain, and had to watch her cry her heart out. I feel for you Chris, and I hope your friend will be okay.

Posted by: Nina at January 7, 2005 6:55 PM

Gah. I know exactly how you feel; several members of my extended family signed up.

Posted by: Fraulein N at January 7, 2005 7:06 PM

Wow, that's a tough one. We have a very good friend in Mosul right now; supposedly just a few more months until he comes home. What makes it easier than your situation, in some ways, is that he's National Guard, has been in since high school to get $$ for school. It's a long saga, but he doesn't want to be there now, doesn't think it's doing much good. And knowing that he had no choice about going makes it easier to be his friend, to keep supporting him (and his wife and son who will be one on Weds.) AND to continue opposing the jackass decision our country made to go there in the first place. [Sorry for the length - you hit a nerve on this one.]

Posted by: mc at January 7, 2005 7:25 PM

Hells yeah.

Tell him that we all hope he stays safe.

Posted by: Jenni at January 7, 2005 7:30 PM

F#ck yeah. Pardon my language.

Posted by: Jon in Michigan at January 7, 2005 8:11 PM

Argh. Big hugs. There are, however, big chances that he'll get a good spot, especially since he's probably brighter than the average bear, and not be on the front lines. He might never even go to Iraq (though who knows about Iran, right? Sigh.).

I do have a friend through The Boy who blogs from Iraq, and he says the armor situation isn't nearly as bad as the media is saying it is, which is encouraging. He also blogs because he's in the communications department, a place that sees ZERO action (so far, thank God) in Iraq.

So, hugs. Chin up and best of luck to your friend.

And to those questioning Chris? He's questioning the motives of his friend, whom HE knows, NOT you. Fuck off.

Posted by: alektra at January 7, 2005 8:15 PM

omg...that's all. just omg... powerful words.

Posted by: debby at January 7, 2005 8:45 PM

Saying prayers for him and everyone in the military. My best friend was in during the first war in Iraq and she was in intelligence, so I never knew where she was. It was always scary, but she made it home OK, praying your friend does too.

Posted by: Krush at January 7, 2005 10:41 PM

Chris - I felt the same way when my brother - a SCHOLARSHIP student at a great university here graduating with his ENGINEERING degree in May - came to me and told me that he had signed up for the Air Force and had made the pilot's cut.

I was so upset... I still get upset. He's my BABY brother... nine years younger than me.. I love him like he was my own.. I am his second mom...

So I understand your feelings -

Posted by: Snidget at January 7, 2005 10:48 PM

i imagine this must be very hard for you. but like someone else mentioned...this is something he felt he had to do for some reason or another, and he will need your support. even though you don't support the cause, support him - as a friend. thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. very powerful.

Posted by: tiffanie at January 8, 2005 12:46 AM

Thank you Chris. Thank you for just writting all of that down and letting it all out there for us to see. This is a huge reason why I read blogs, to read the truth, to see what is in some one else's head and heart, and mostly to see that we are a human race and we have these thoughts that we Do Not Have To Hide!

Posted by: ayedoneaux at January 8, 2005 1:20 AM


Posted by: jenorama at January 8, 2005 2:10 AM

None of us want to lose our friends in the war. War is hell. Every war has been hell, from Vietam to pre-history. Why does anyone have to fight when loving is so much easier, and it has nicer results. But I also want to know why the terrorists had to fly planes into the World Trade Center, or why people beat their wives, abuse their children, or shoot each other on the street. Seems to be some evil working out there, and I think the one, true goal of humanity is to banish all evil and practice good works. We poor humans just muddle through.....

Posted by: Cyn at January 8, 2005 1:54 PM

Wow, Chris. That was amazingly expressed. I will keep your friend, along with everyone trying to create peace over there, in my thoughts.

Posted by: supine at January 8, 2005 3:14 PM

No, seriously, Chris: How do you really feel?

Posted by: DeAnn at January 8, 2005 5:04 PM

I can't believe you haven't gotten slammed on this post yet. If this were on my site? I'd have like 35 hatemails by now! Everyone loves you. I hate you for that! ;)

Posted by: RockStar Mommy at January 8, 2005 5:46 PM

You know where I'm at with the administration, and I'll let you surmise where I'm at on the war...
but like you, I am open-minded. And I'm very sorry you are hurting so much for your friend, and for your country. Even though we are at opposite ends of the political spectrum in so many ways, I'm glad that we both care so much.

Posted by: bond girl at January 8, 2005 5:55 PM


Amazing. You vent almost exactly the way I do.

I pray he doesn't get sent overseas, but, well, I wasn't born yesterday, so, WHEN he is, I hope he will survive it. It's a freaking madhouse.

As my husband said "No wonder Saddam was such a mean sonofabitch.Nobody tried any of this s*it with him."

Chris? Amen brother.

Posted by: Scarlett Cyn at January 8, 2005 6:12 PM

Well, this will definately change his life, one way or another. I know it did mine. Sometimes people need experiences like this to define them and ground them.

The Army would have been a good life choice for him 5 years ago. But now? 80% of new recruits are deployed. All you can do now is show him some love, and don't rub in the "I told you so's" too hard. He'll be okay. Not all soldiers end up being bullet sponges. Really. Tell him to keep his head down, socks dry, drink water, and tuck and roll!

Posted by: myllissa at January 8, 2005 8:09 PM

Good thoughts for your friend. So well vented. From one bleeding heart anti-war blogger to another...

Posted by: Keri at January 8, 2005 11:18 PM

Let me start this off by stating one glaring out point in your mission statement. You believe "express their own opinions and determine their own values. Far be it from me to impose my values on others". Yet you berate a friend for joining the military. Hey man its what he wants to do. Maybe he doesnt think being a cubicle jockey is such a great thingy to be doing. HEll hes willing to go out and put his ass on the line so you and all of us can stand on our soap boxes and shoot at him. Maybe he wants to make a difference. Maybe he wants an education. MAybe he sees no other way out except the military. If he is a friend you should support him. Heck we all have silly assed ideas on what to do with ourselves. Shit man I have an M.A in economics and Im a plumber. Some say Im wasting my education. Do I give a fuck what they think. NO. But I also dont shoot at them for working for the govt. OR sitting behind a desk all day. I really dont give a shit what they do. So long as they are happy doing what they do. I have a cousin in the canadian military. (oxymoron I know) But hey who am I say. I dont have all the answers and Im in no position the dictate what others do. Well except for my friends who support our liberal govt. See canadian liberals believe you dont know whtta heel youre doing so they'll regulate your life for you. You know_ you cant spray your lawn with bug killer. Cats have to be on leashes. I personally think cats should be fed to dogs. OR at least launched from skeet Shooting machines and then shot at. But I digress. Our libs try to run our lives for us. Not sure if thats the same as american libs.

Posted by: shaners at January 9, 2005 12:24 PM


Posted by: La Bella at January 9, 2005 12:30 PM

i was totally expecting more hate comments too. is it wrong that i'm disappointed?

but seriously, i am sorry. i don't know how this is possible, but i don't know anyone over there. no family, no friends...the only possibility is an ex and I have no idea if he is or isn't, although i'm quite sure he's been called to do something. but i would have a fit if someone close to me decided now of all times to join.

Posted by: laura at January 9, 2005 1:03 PM

Beautifully fucking put.

Posted by: Fluffy at January 10, 2005 8:02 AM

I'm sure if they could, the people that lived under the terror of Saddam Hussein, the people that lost family members or friends in the world trade center would like to express eternal gratitude to your friend. If they could, they would tell him just what was said earlier, thank you because now we can say "we are a human race and we have these thoughts that we Do Not Have To Hide!" because they no longer have to hide their opinions and beliefs. They are now closer to being free from tyranny. And the victims of the world trade centers would probably like to tell him thank you and God bless for making sure my family member or my friend didn't die without someone, somewhere making sure that more Americans aren't subjected to some freaks religous views through terroristic violence. And tell him from me that I'll be praying for his safe return just like I do all soldiers and that I fret all the time because really, all of them are somebodie's baby. And you're so right, what the f*ck was he thinking and I'm sure there will be countless times he asks himself that same question, but also, Thank you because what you are doing, is making a difference.

Posted by: wlfldy at January 10, 2005 8:34 AM


I love your sentiments - I can tell you really care about your friend. Very well put, thanks for sharing that. My mom feels the same about me...


Posted by: Sashinka at January 11, 2005 12:16 PM