July 28, 2005

Random Thursday Observations

So, I'm trying to make a concerted effort not to blog only about parenthood and stuff. But that's hard. I mean, that's pretty much 99% of what I've got going right now. The other 1% seems to be reserved for sleep. I wouldn't know. Sleep, oh you are an elusive mistress. Anyway, I did find myself contemplating a few things over the last couple of days.

My daughter might become a big dork. The other night we watched Doctor Who followed by Buffy The Vampire Slayer. And Buffy? Totally inappropriate infant viewing material. Or would be, rather, if she could actually see farther than 10 inches. But don't worry. I've been attempting to expose her to more cultured things as well. That's why we watched The Surreal Life late last night.

Having kids is a defining thing. Being a parent lets you add "parent" to the list of things you are. And it becomes the most important thing on the list. I was in the local drug store picking up some stuff for Mia. Behind me was a guy buying simply a case of Bud and a fly swatter. Now, call me crazy, but I'm so much happier having a child and wife who need me to run home to instead of a roomful of insects and bad beer buzz.

For many years of my life I have been tremendously intrigued by breasts. You know - in the 14 year-old, mondo-ogling kind of way. However, only now in my 32nd year have I realized how complex they are. There's more to breasts than cheap thrills for guys and John Waters' movies. Damn, I have a kid and I go getting all deep and shit.

Not working for two weeks? Rocks.

Posted by Chris at July 28, 2005 2:37 PM
Comments

I'm laughing at the combo of Doctor Who and Buffy. Of course, I laugh because I like both of those shows.

Posted by: Kelley at July 28, 2005 2:42 PM

You are so dang funny! Who knew breasts were more than mere playthings??! (((HUGS)))

By the way, under the Who Is Rude Cactus header, you need to change Father-to-be to FATHER.

Posted by: zanie at July 28, 2005 2:43 PM

Nice to see an entry here, but man, your search strings are going to be interesting. What with fly swatters, breasts, Bud, John Waters, 10 inches, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer all in the same post. Hee. Oh and I forgot cheap thrills.

Posted by: Sue at July 28, 2005 2:44 PM

have i got a shirt for you!

https://secure13.nexternal.com/tshirtstha/images/boobies2.jpg

Posted by: jodi at July 28, 2005 2:49 PM

Breasts are amazing arent they? ha! Being a parent definitely is amazing. Told ya! ;)

Posted by: Tricia at July 28, 2005 2:50 PM

being a parent is the best thing in the world!

Posted by: Veronica at July 28, 2005 2:51 PM

Agreed on the parent thing! And the boob thing? Women have been trying to get men to realize this for quiet some time now.

Posted by: Queen of Ass at July 28, 2005 2:56 PM

Sorry, but the guy with the bud and the fly swatter? He has a two year old.

Trust me, I'm at that point.

Posted by: Rbelle at July 28, 2005 2:56 PM

Dr Who rocks...and of course is suitable baby-viewing material...you wanna raise her right, right?

For the most part, I bet most of us don't care if you are all about the parenthood thing right now, I know that's all *I* wanna hear about. You can probably stop after oh, 18 years or so.

Oh and rofl on the beer and fly swatter guy.

Posted by: jen at July 28, 2005 3:05 PM

Too funny. All of it. Please, let's get the child some Jane Austen miniseries, stat! She needs some culture.

This WOULD be a great time to catch up on concert DVDs, non? Have you seen Pink Floyd Live At Pompei? I am supposed to sit down and watch it for real, I've just seen snippets. I think Mia needs some Dave Gilmore.

Posted by: samantha at July 28, 2005 3:16 PM

don't worry about blogging only about parenthood. I think its normal to from time to time become obsessed with an aspect of your life and blog about it. (See: Mazing Amy and crazy but loved boyfriend - June-July 05 lol) And next up on my blog is: Caribbean Vacation Nov 05, am obsessed, want to go now!

And I love hearing about new parenthood as it helps me define my ambivalent feelings about whether I will ever want to be a mom or not.

And.. this is a WONDEROUS period in your life, so BLOG AWAY about it!

:)A

Posted by: amy at July 28, 2005 3:26 PM

people have probably told you this but you might want to change the info paragraph on your blog to "father" instead of "father-to-be"

well. ya know, when you're not busy being all daddish and stuff. :) i'm very very very (etc) happy for all of you

Posted by: kate at July 28, 2005 3:26 PM

Only cultured people watch Buffy.

(Yeah, I have all 7 seasons on DVD, as well as the pilot episode on VHS, heh.)

My husband likes Doctor Who. *shudders*

Posted by: Spring at July 28, 2005 3:46 PM

Sorry, but the guy with the bud and the fly swatter? He has a two year old. Nah, the father of a two-year-old would be buying something stronger than Bud.

Parenthood totally changes your life. And you will hear yourself say thing that you never thought you would as they get older. Things like "No, the dog does not want to wear your hat!" or "Pretzels are not for breakfast."

Posted by: MamaKaren at July 28, 2005 3:50 PM

Doctor Who? Never heard of it but sounds intriguing.

i would love to have 2 wks off.

Posted by: angel at July 28, 2005 4:16 PM

I think we'd all be disappointed if you dared talk about anything except Mia for the next week or so.

Also, yay paternity leave! I don't know many guys that take it, so I'm glad you get to be home with your girls right now.

Posted by: Dawnie at July 28, 2005 4:20 PM

I'm glad you're getting to stay home for two weeks. It's so good for all of you.

Cas
enjoy

Posted by: cassie-b at July 28, 2005 4:27 PM

Dr. Who isn't scary for kids. Now Teletubbies...that's a totally different story. Why don't you plop her down in front of some Sesame Street...I loved that stuff when I was little...learned some Spanish too! Bueno!

Posted by: Michelle at July 28, 2005 4:56 PM

JUST BE CAREFUL WHEN THE WIGGLES ARRIVE! ;)

Posted by: Dubs at July 28, 2005 5:17 PM

oh, and while your out being all busy and stuff, you should try and update Mia's blog as well! ;P

I think she's a little too busy to do so herself! ;)

Posted by: Dubs at July 28, 2005 5:21 PM

Sure miss you when you're busy, Chris. I rely on you for my daily after-work LOL. You and your readers never let me down.
Re: television programming and a multitude of societal (word?) issues- aren't you amazed how your views begin to shift under the visage of parenthood??? You start to see everything through your child's eyes. It's ok- for the most part, it's a good way to see. Those 10 inches will slowly telescope to encompass the Big Picture. That's when you notice that everything's wrong. Didn't mean to scare you there... You already can see that, it just gets wrong-er for a parent. Don't be surprised when you and Beth decide to build a compound, plant a garden and make plans to home-school Mia.

Posted by: JuJu's Mom at July 28, 2005 5:24 PM

Now is the time to start that list of "Things I will never do as a parent and/or things my child will never do because my child will naturally be superior to the other spawnlings."

Oh, the comedy!

Posted by: Jenny at July 28, 2005 6:32 PM

*cough* not to be pushy or anything... but I've got this wee thing I emailed you about... ;)

I'm glad you're having such a good time being a dad. And that last picture. too.damn.cute.

Posted by: Autumn at July 28, 2005 6:37 PM

Go ahead a tell us all about what Mia is doing- your take on things (even if we've gone through it ourselves) is what I'm here for. Blog away!

Posted by: Nic at July 28, 2005 8:20 PM

WOW! i havent read your site for about...a month? and you went and had a baby and everything! congratulations to both of you, she's so pretty!

and also, your uncle and his car..! fantastic...
i will make an effort to visit here more often, i hope everythings going well!

Posted by: monkey at July 28, 2005 8:38 PM

p.s. did you mean the new dr who..? its so good! its all finished here (uk) until christmas...i need more...!

Posted by: monkey at July 28, 2005 8:40 PM

Talk all you want about Mia....This is the happiest time of your life and your sharing it with everyone :) Enjoy!!

Posted by: Lauren at July 28, 2005 8:44 PM

Audioblog her! We want to hear! Okay, I want to hear and I'm just narcissistic enough to think I can speak for the entire Internet, bwaaa haaa haaa!

Posted by: Stacy at July 28, 2005 8:48 PM

I am amazed at how funny you are on no sleep!

Posted by: Pinky at July 28, 2005 8:54 PM

what?!?!?! buffy's not appropriate infant viewing? well, poo...i'm gonna have to rethink my whole parenting strategy for when the boy and i procreate ;)

and don't worry about blogging about parenthood all the time...hearing about mia and your days of new parenting is far more interesting than that other 1% of your life that's devoted to sleep right now. unless, of course, that 1% of your life includes funky dreams. then perhaps it will be interesting, although never as interesting as new parenthood....

Posted by: suze at July 28, 2005 11:13 PM

That's such a cool thing to read for me, who would like to be in that position sometime fairly soon.

And yes, the two weeks off just might be something of a motivator... :)

Posted by: ~L. at July 29, 2005 7:05 AM

"So, I'm trying to make a concerted effort not to blog only about parenthood and stuff. But that's hard. I mean, that's pretty much 99% of what I've got going right now."

--yeah, I know exactly what you mean. All I am right now is a pregnant mother and it's hard to avoid whining about that on my blog. We're getting very excited as the last weeks are rolling away and EVERYTHING is here but the baby.

Don't worry about blogging too much about parenting. I think we're all enjoying reading about your perspective on daddyhood -it doesn't seem like we have very many male bloggers who share those feelings -kinda makes you unique to us.

Posted by: hr mommy at July 29, 2005 7:10 AM

When Princess was a baby, and I had to feed her all through the night, she watched infomercials. Now if that hasn't warped her, Buffy won't either hee!

Posted by: Nina at July 29, 2005 7:31 AM

Chris, you rock! I am so excited to read about your and Beth's foray into parenthood. I think the TV selection is pretty humorous -- as long as you shield her from Paris Hilton as long as possible, I think you're doing well. :)

And I'm not a parent (and truth be told have never had much fascination with breasts beyond how mine look in particular shirts), but I admit the first time I watched my sister breastfeed, I was in total awe. The human body is absolutely f-ing amazing.

Posted by: susannah at July 29, 2005 8:31 AM

I think it's safe to say we all enjoy the Daddy-stories. Keep 'em coming. What an amazing time in your life. You'll never have THIS experience again (being first timers and all). Soak it up - sleep will come eventually....right??????

Posted by: carrster at July 29, 2005 9:13 AM

Oh, hey, have you come upon the night yet where the two of you sit on the floor of the nursery (or the edge of the bathtub, or something like that) and sob because the baby won't stop crying and you think, "Oh my GOD what have we done, can we send her back because I JUST CAN'T DO THIS"?

When (not IF, WHEN) that time comes, just know that every other parent I've ever talked to has had that exact same thought. Sometimes multiple times.

Posted by: Stacy at July 29, 2005 9:25 AM

When I was on maternity leave, I was so guilty of watching Jerry Springer while feeding the babe lunch. I definitely think Buffy would have been the better option.

Posted by: trb at July 29, 2005 10:49 AM

What I do is buy beer for me and fly swatters (not the plural) for the kids. Then they can run around and a) get exercise and 2) kill critters that bite while I drink my beer.

But NO, it would not be Bud. It would be something much better.

How many people have asked you "Is this your first?" when you are at the store / doctors office / pharmacy / library etc? We got that All. The. Time. I guess cuz we looked like clueless nooBs.

And if you like Buffy? You'll love Firefly. It's kinda like Buffy, Doctor Who, and the Dukes of Hazard thrown in a blender.

Posted by: ben at July 29, 2005 11:32 AM

You're in the 'new parent fog', which typically lasts about 3 months or so. You'll emerge afterward - blinking, rubbing your eyes, and amazed at all the light and the noise.

Everything will seem familiar - yet not. Everything's shifted, tilted - just a little off-balance at first. Life-changing events have that kind of effect, don't you know.

And the fog/cloud? Not a bad place to be for those first few months. Revel in it, and don't feel as if you need to apologize.

You bring back now-fond thoughts of sleepless nights on the couch with an infant watching VH1's Insomniac Music Video, among other memories.

Posted by: Betsy at July 29, 2005 12:39 PM

I totally laughed out loud sitting here in my office when I read the part about the guy with the Bud and the fly swatter. I think I may agree with the other person who thinks he has a two year old. Sometimes a two year old can drive you to drinking Bud and swatting yourself with a fly swatter.

It's okay that you have been talking about Mia. She is your life, now! And that is what we love about this site, is your candor about your life.

Posted by: Katie-be-bored-at-work at July 29, 2005 3:17 PM

hey, buffy is way deep and will make an excellent role model for little mia someday.

Posted by: laura at July 29, 2005 3:36 PM

Defining moments are good for you. Stretches you as a person, pushes your buttons as to what you REALLY believe! Enjoy the journey! : )

Posted by: Gypsy at July 29, 2005 11:46 PM

You have no idea, our oldest daughter is obsessed with Star Wars, thanks to her daddy. It's sad when your 4.5 year old is saying, "No mommy! That's Boba FETT!" (in a very 'duh, roll your eyes' kind of way). Is this my life?

And yes, having kids is a defining (and wonderful thing)...Ross and I had a similar experience with the 'I cannot BELIEVE they're letting us bring this alive human home with us!" But we survived, and you will too. It all becomes more and more familiar, until you don't know what you did withOUT the child! Wait 'til you're out on your first dates-after-the-baby, and all you can talk/think about is the baby. It's a sad state of affairs.

Also (fitting all my comments into ONE comment), love the name Mia. It has always been one of my favorites, and unfortunately I have a cousin named Mia, otherwise I probably would've used it. As it is, our youngest is Sofia, but everyone calls her Fia.

And the boobs thing. They're fascinating in a new way, yes. But you'll go back to the oogling-in-a-fourteen-year-old-boy way once that baby's off the boob. The 'complex' will fade away and you'll just like to look at them again, soon enough. ;)

And also (like I said, one comment, to multiple posts), love all your pics, per usual. I highly suggest (and I"m sure you're already on it) you get all the little tiny details, the half-moon-barely-formed fingernails, the wrinkly-foot-bottoms. They'll never look that tiny and unformed again. I highly suggest (I hope this doesn't sound obnoxious, but I've done a lot of baby shoots), a room, non-patterened sheets, and light streaming in through a window to get said shots -- they look so beautiful that way.

Congratulations Chris, welcome to being a daddy.

Posted by: Kelly McCord at August 1, 2005 12:05 AM

what kind of drug store was that, it had beer...most dont here in MA...speaking of swatters, i need one!

Posted by: lizabetty at August 2, 2005 6:48 PM


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