October 6, 2005

Missed Comments

As you might have noticed, my hosting provider had a few problems last night. This stopped everyone from commenting. But it didn't stop anyone from trying to comment. Through the miracle of modern technology, I've been able to capture a few of the unsuccessfully posted comments here.

From: Fluviana Amore
URL: http://www.getyerdwarfon.com
Tired you are getting of watching normal people get it on? I think then you would be liking to see hardcore dwarf-on-dwarf action big boy. It is a small world after all.

From: K. Hudson
URL: http://www.marriedtoablackcrow.com
You are a god.

From: Ed McMahon
URL: http://www.washedupstarclearinghouse.com
Hiyoh! If you think you've won $15 million, you are correct sir! I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to tell you when I was with the Prize Delegation in your front yard. The shotgun wasn't necessary. You could have said what Johnny always told me when he wanted to be alone - "go somewhere else you miserable fat-ass." Oh, that Johnny. Perhaps with your big winnings, you'll be able to pay to have the buckshot removed from my vast posterior. And don't worry - unless he strokes out from carrying that gigantic check again, Dick Clark and I will be back again tomorrow.

From: T. Cruise
URL: http://www.batshitcrazyceleb.com
Kat, the Galactic Overlords and I wanted you to be the first to know that we're having a baby! Bet you don't think it was a publicity stunt now, do you? What do you think of the name L. Ron Hubbard Cruise? Maybe Elle, if its a girl.

From: Pixel and Callie
URL: http://www.disgruntledkitties.com
Look, we know you've got your hands full with that whole baby thing and we're pretty good about putting up with all the crying and waiting for meals and stuff. But we're still around, you know. How many times do we have to cough up hairballs to get you to notice us? We're taking out furniture next. Be warned.

From: Eddie Chromosome
URL: http://www.dirtcheapsoftware.com
U can now affort MicroSoft productz for you're very own self computer, cowboy. Wouldntt you like to process words and make charts of numbers? Wouldnt you like to kreate professionnal looking documentz? Wouldnt your like to show the big cheeze how much your rocking? Great Microsoft applications are within your grasping. Check out our website for many fine products which are totally legal wink wink.

From: W
URL: http://www.whytehousse.com
Hello there Mr. Cactus, if that is your real name. Heh. I want you to stop all this negativization of my presidentiality. It's not American, its negatory and undermines the very freedoms I'm trying to protect from the forces of evil who might wish to do us harm. Oh, and put in a good word for Harriet, while you're at it. That's all. God bless. Do you know where I can find some dwarf porn? Shh, don't tell Laura.

Posted by Chris at October 6, 2005 7:27 AM

"Shh, don't tell Laura" Heeeeee!!

Excellent post...and my Allie knows how your kitties feel, she is so ignored these days. I'm waiting for the retaliation.

Posted by: JuJuBee at October 6, 2005 9:37 AM

Interesting...Dwarf porn huh? No thanks.

Posted by: Theresa at October 6, 2005 9:44 AM

WTF?! Did people send you that stuff?! Dwarf porno?? Thats some crazy shit.

Posted by: Michelle at October 6, 2005 9:46 AM

too funny.
I hear TomKat got preggers just to get your attention.... how's that workin' out.

Do you have a baby sling? The kind you strap the baby to you with? Our grumpy little girl would instantly stop that whining when I strapped her to me. I've tied her to my back, my chest, my stomach, half upside down, whatever it took. She was different...needed a different approach. At 16 she's still different, I adore that in her. Just a suggestion. Try it.

Posted by: dazeymae at October 6, 2005 9:57 AM

"negativization of my presidentiality"

I love it. Sad thing is, Bush talking reminds me of Will Farrell on SNL instead of the other way around. Well, it's not REALLY sad....

Posted by: Hazel at October 6, 2005 9:58 AM

fluviana amore? oh that's priceless. that is so going on my spam name list.

Posted by: jodi at October 6, 2005 10:10 AM

I think my dogs and your cats have been talking. They differ on the hairball point though.

Posted by: Melissa S at October 6, 2005 10:37 AM

Wow. And I thought I was your most famous visitor.

You have quite the who's who of society commenting here. Perhaps it's time I start reading comments instead of just reading your posts and then commenting.

Marshall Mathers, if you're reading this, love you. We will marry. Just ask Rude Cacti for my e-mail address, love.

Posted by: Grace at October 6, 2005 10:40 AM

yup W came to the right source... you know where to find the dwarf porn right?? :)

same site that counted down the date to when Katie "gave it up." Makes you wonder why he refused to knock up Nicole Kidman over 10 years (and knew how not to) and Katie has a bun in the oven in less than 6 months... Man she must have had that abstinence only sex ed!

Posted by: stinkerbell at October 6, 2005 10:41 AM

Love the 'W' comment. heh heh.....Very clever post.

Posted by: carrster at October 6, 2005 10:49 AM


Posted by: Rhonda at October 6, 2005 10:55 AM

Hee. Dwarf porn.

Posted by: Heather at October 6, 2005 11:27 AM

Most. Excellent. Post. Ever.

Posted by: Ms. Q at October 6, 2005 11:47 AM

Excellent start to the day. Scary thing is, I'd be happier if W stuck to surfing blogs than actually attempting to run the country . . . .

Posted by: wavybrains at October 6, 2005 11:53 AM

Very funny. I'm shocked to find that disgruntledkitties.com and batshitcrazyceleb.com aren't actually in use out there somewhere. If Disgruntled Kitties doesn't say "high school punk rock band", I don't know what does.

Posted by: Mayberry at October 6, 2005 12:18 PM

Where was Martha Stewart?

Posted by: trish at October 6, 2005 12:31 PM

Bravo Chris - that post is absolute genius...the Tom Cruise reference had me rolling

Posted by: Lee at October 6, 2005 12:45 PM

that. just brightened my day. thank you.

Posted by: steph at October 6, 2005 1:30 PM

Hehehe, I love your humor!!

Posted by: Tammy at October 6, 2005 2:51 PM

See, that would normally have made me chuckle. But today? What with the exhaustion? Totally LMAO. Especially the Bushisms showing in the made up words. Well done!

Posted by: Heather at October 6, 2005 4:12 PM

dwarf on dwarf action... you know I've probably gotten that one too... in between all the texas-hold-ems.

Posted by: Snidget at October 6, 2005 8:24 PM

Oh you truly crack me up hee!!!!

Posted by: Nina at October 6, 2005 9:26 PM


Posted by: Elizabeth at October 6, 2005 9:50 PM

I swear you were channeling Will Forte on the Bush comment.

Posted by: Mel at October 6, 2005 11:31 PM

You crack me up!
So realistic...was it REALLY from W?
Smirk wink!

Posted by: Gypsy at October 6, 2005 11:36 PM

Hehehehehehehehe.... :)

Posted by: Zandria at October 7, 2005 12:21 AM

"You are a god."

... and K. Hudson is marriedtoablackcow.

Posted by: Greg at October 7, 2005 6:38 AM

Oh, that was a well-needed laugh on a cloudy Friday morning :)

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