November 28, 2005

Sign Of The Times

Last week, Beth and I headed to our local Borders to find a book on sign language for babies. I know what you're thinking and, frankly, I thought it was pretty silly myself until Beth told me more about it. Apparently, babies can sign before they can speak so, why not try and teach them the essentials early on? Like, hey, break out the boob, I'm hungry or that hurts like a mo-fo - help! I was totally on-board...or I was until I opened the book and found some freaky-looking dude from the seventies with a big old shaggy mustasche making obscene hand gestures at me. Look for yourselves.

Wouldn't that freak you out just a little? You can see how I found that slightly disturbing, right? If you flip the book over and look at the author's photograph, this is actually a pretty decent likeness. But if you were the artist, wouldn't you, maybe, try and tone it down a little bit? Try and take a little of the "washed up porn star" out of the sign language book for children?

I did a little digging, a little field research, and I found out how to properly describe my little discovery in sign language.

Posted by Chris at November 28, 2005 7:48 AM

AHAHH, that should be the DEFINITIVE sign for "seventies-looking"! Contact Congress, it's a hit!

Posted by: wn at November 28, 2005 7:51 AM

LOL! Once again you've managed to brighten my morning with laughter. Thanks Chris!

Posted by: Marie at November 28, 2005 7:53 AM

Bwahahahahaha!! That first picture is enough to give any baby bad dreams!!

Posted by: Amber at November 28, 2005 8:01 AM


Posted by: penguintarts at November 28, 2005 8:03 AM

LOL, Thank you for saving a dreary monday.

Posted by: Angelia at November 28, 2005 8:25 AM

Oh my, what a thick mustache that guy has...

Chris, you made me laugh before I had any coffee. I didn't think that was possible!

Posted by: samantha at November 28, 2005 8:31 AM

Chris, great facial expressions in your signing! Ha!!

Posted by: Dolly at November 28, 2005 8:36 AM

Laughing, laughing, laughing. I had to spend several minutes tearing myself away from that growth on his face before I could read the post. I thought he had been involved over at my place in some kind of slug sex.

Great signing, Chris. Think of the places you'll go and the people you'll meet. Leave the baby home with Beth.

Posted by: Vicki at November 28, 2005 8:37 AM

P.S. Are you a "closet signer"? Where ARE you in those pictures?

Posted by: Vicki at November 28, 2005 8:38 AM

Hahahaha.... Thanks, I needed a laugh this morning. Maybe I can find a DIFERENT book about signing for Ava's Xmas stocking....

Posted by: Kris at November 28, 2005 8:50 AM

that's some fancy signing there on your part. and one scary looking dude in the book. viva la sign language :)

Posted by: suze at November 28, 2005 8:51 AM

Bwah! Love the signs. That '70s guy is scary-looking, in a very After-School Special kind of way.

Posted by: Fraulein N at November 28, 2005 9:00 AM

oh mi god. I am in such hysterics at my desk which no one can understand... and the tears roll!

Posted by: stinkerbell at November 28, 2005 9:07 AM

That's funny and almost as crazy as the children's book, "Love You Forever" When the kid grows up his mom sneaks into his house to rock him on her lap. The book freaks me out!!! LOL

Posted by: ::c:: at November 28, 2005 9:32 AM

Hilarious! I'm glad to see that the sleep deprivation isn't interfering with the funny.

Also, please to define/describe what you mean by 'field research'?

Posted by: pea at November 28, 2005 9:35 AM

I took a quick glance at the signing pics and wondered why you were posting pics of Geraldo. Very funny stuff.

Posted by: Mike at November 28, 2005 9:35 AM

holy crap, you kill me!!! hilarious!

Posted by: misifoota at November 28, 2005 9:39 AM


Nico never learned to sign, he just learned to grab. And perhaps now we have an explanation as to why!

Now I must go find something to wash the coffee off my screen.

Posted by: Nat at November 28, 2005 9:43 AM

Too funny! When can I find your book on the shelves?

Posted by: Dooneybug at November 28, 2005 9:47 AM

Don't laugh, man. This shit works. Have the kid to prove it. A friend of mine has a company that runs these classes for parents and wrote a book on it with some of the reigning authorities. It's very cool to see it work.

But, you? Have mad skillz. All you are missing is a suit with collars as wide as the LIE.

Happy Monday, all!

Posted by: Pammer at November 28, 2005 9:47 AM

You owe me some Windex, man.

Posted by: Alison at November 28, 2005 9:50 AM

I'm glad Alison warned me how funny this post is.

I set my mug of hot coffee down.

Good think I did.

Posted by: Allan at November 28, 2005 9:52 AM

OMG...that it TOO, what exactly is that 70's guy supposed to be signing anyway? The first one kinda looks like "I need a cheeseburger", the second I have NO clue and the third looks like he just got done surfing! HANG TEN DUDE! ;P

Posted by: Michelle at November 28, 2005 9:54 AM

Teehee. I vote for more sign language entries.

Posted by: alfredsmom at November 28, 2005 9:55 AM

aaaaaaaaaahahahha that's priceless. hopefully that will be mia's first phrase.

i have heard that stuff works though (sans porno guy) and if it was featured in Meet the Fockers, it cant be all bad, right? ;)

Posted by: kate at November 28, 2005 10:25 AM

Geraldo Rivera's secret life of a sign language model.

Posted by: TTL at November 28, 2005 10:38 AM LOL! I love your sign language!

Posted by: Theresa at November 28, 2005 11:00 AM

Looking foward to when Mia signs "porn guy" on the playground . . . . Hhehehee :)

Posted by: wavybrains at November 28, 2005 11:11 AM

OMG, thanks for the laugh. You crack me up. The porn guy is creepy for sure. Yikes.

Posted by: VirgoJen at November 28, 2005 11:16 AM

I spit soda out. Congrats, it's up my nose and all over my shirt.

That guy IS weird looking. Reminds me of all of the pictures they used to make of child kidnappers in the 80's. They were ALWAYS in a white van and they ALWAYS had that moustache.

Posted by: Betty at November 28, 2005 11:30 AM

Hehe, it's like Robert DeNiro in Meet the Fockers. If you haven't seen that movie, you might want to... he does the same thing. All kidding aside, that is a great idea though.

Posted by: Carla at November 28, 2005 11:41 AM

excuse me, but i was all set to have a crankity monday morning and you just totally ruined it by being funny and junk.

thanks a lot, monster.

Posted by: melati at November 28, 2005 11:42 AM

You have way too much time on your hands. Way. Too much.


Sign language is so great for babies! Just be careful that you don't turn into Jack in Meet the Fockers. Cuz that's just insanity.

Posted by: Rhonda at November 28, 2005 11:47 AM

That was fucking brilliant :) But I seriously hope you didn't show the "porn guy" sign to Mia - you might want to keep her mind pure at least until her first birthday :)

Also, you have a lot of work to do to achieve that level of 'tache.

Posted by: Zoe at November 28, 2005 11:49 AM

LOL!! I didn't think that anything could save this day for me but you have just done the job!
Laughing so hard my boss (who sits accross from me) is looking at me funny...

Chris, you funny man!

Posted by: Nynke at November 28, 2005 11:59 AM

You put the crack in my day! Im gonna try this sign thing too.Keep us informed

Posted by: That Girl at November 28, 2005 12:38 PM

I really needed that!!!!!!!! LOL!!

Posted by: Sue at November 28, 2005 1:07 PM

ROTFLMAO....That is exactly what we all needed to start this Monday off. Thanks, Chris!!

Posted by: Bayou at November 28, 2005 1:13 PM

That is the funniest post! Ever! I am literally in tears from laughing so hard. My nosey boss just came by and asked me what was so funny. If I get fired for reading blogs, this post was totally worth it!

Posted by: anita at November 28, 2005 1:54 PM

We taught our son a few basic signs; he knows the sign for "more", "eat" and "milk". Its really been a godsend since Christopher is a little behind in his speech development (do to a hearing problem he had around 12 months.)

I wish we would have taught him more but now we are concentrating on his speech; though he still uses signs some times.

Oh and I would watch where you use the "porn guy" sign, people might get the wrong idea. :)

Posted by: Chris Price at November 28, 2005 2:42 PM

hey! great idea. I did it with my t hree children, makes for much less stressful times when they can tell you what they want/need... and it actually paths the way for less tantrums. If they can communicate, they dont get as frustrated! YAY for Beth!

Posted by: Carly at November 28, 2005 3:33 PM

I like your version better. Heh!

Posted by: Queen of Ass at November 28, 2005 4:48 PM

I work at a early childhood development center (just the accountant, but anyways), and the sign language really does work. Then again, none of our teachers looks like a '70s washed up porn star. Thanks for making me laugh today. I needed it.

Posted by: Heather at November 28, 2005 4:58 PM

That first picture on the left, looks like he's imitating a monster "RAAAHHHHH!". Either that, or he's telling the reader how to ask for a burger.

Posted by: Colleen at November 28, 2005 5:39 PM

But as far as the actual signing thing goes, I know of some families it's worked with.

Good luck, nice pictures! :D

Posted by: Phillip at November 28, 2005 5:51 PM

Way too funny for a Monday! :)

Thank you! :):)

Posted by: Kelly at November 28, 2005 5:59 PM

it's all about the facial expressions when you are signing. obviously, you cannot be as expressive if you are sporting a big porn star mustache. what were they thinking?

you, however, have a gift for it.

Posted by: jodi at November 28, 2005 6:04 PM

I truly adore your version of the book more. :) Great job, Chris!

Posted by: Brooke at November 28, 2005 6:06 PM

LOL You are killing me! My favorite one is the Porn Guy sign. Too darn funny!

Seriously though, I taught our 2 yr old signs because she can never get a word in edgewise. She now signs and talks. I think she's Italian.

Posted by: doula Amy at November 28, 2005 6:19 PM

You're absolutely hilarious! I'd have had that same take on the book, only you took it one step farther and made your own 'illustrations' (for lack of a better word). I think perhaps you have found your niche in the world!

Posted by: ironic1 at November 28, 2005 6:23 PM

Ok...after I finished laughing, I do have to tell you that sign language for babies can be very effective. One of my close friends has a little boy who was signing very early on. I was taking care of him one day a week for her and he knew the signs for eat, shoes, book, milk, and drink among is actually amazing how early they can communicate through signing even though they can't speak yet.

Posted by: Dana at November 28, 2005 7:30 PM

I like YOUR sign language better. Much more entertaining. especially with the facial expressions.

My MIL gave me a book on the sign language. I'll have to ask her where she got it. There was also a tape. But I don't remember watching it. (Probably because my child would still wake up like eleventy-million, billion times throughout the course of one night even up to the age of 1. So I'm pretty sleep deprived and that whole year is very hazy.)

But it is pretty cool. Although my child just chose to scream 99.9% of the time instead of attempting a gesture.

Posted by: Lisa B at November 28, 2005 8:28 PM

HA! I'd buy a book on Chris' Baby Sign Language any day! That was great!

Posted by: Heather at November 28, 2005 9:05 PM

rofl! Porn signing. Let your fingers do the walking.

Posted by: dragonlady474 at November 28, 2005 10:33 PM

You silly. Me laughing. HAHAHAHAAHA!

Posted by: Amy at November 28, 2005 11:16 PM

LOL, that is great! I love the pictures!

We taught both our daughters sign language and they caught on pretty quick. It was really helpful. We only did the basics, they stopped using it once they talked, but it was still good.

Posted by: Emily at November 29, 2005 12:33 AM

Hahahhahahahahahahahaha! Priceless. Thanks for the laugh!

Posted by: Sweety at November 29, 2005 1:30 AM

ROTFLMAO. Seriously, you really do know what she's saying--do you need her to sign it?

Trust me she'll be talking soon enough, and one day you're going to say..."could you please be quiet for like 2 minutes please?"

Posted by: Michele at November 29, 2005 2:53 AM

hehe... What a crack up!

Posted by: sara at November 29, 2005 6:49 AM

Ha! LOL thanks for the laugh, I needed it this morning.

Posted by: Jenn at November 29, 2005 7:34 AM

Hahahaha, I can't believe I was so busy and stressed out yesterday that I missed this post. It would have totally changed my mood.

Posted by: ava at November 29, 2005 12:01 PM

hahaha..funny stuff :) but are you telling me there isn't a more recent book out there? or a video? I have a friend who is doing that and it's pretty cool to see the little ones signing.

Posted by: laura at November 29, 2005 1:15 PM

I have to say...the funniest part is that I know the thought and time that went into that post! And oh, yeah...sign is good. Start with yes, no, and more. I used to work with adults with disabilities, and those were the signs we used the most. More seems to be the easiest to sign at first too.

Posted by: feisty girl at November 29, 2005 4:08 PM

I'm so glad I came over here to read you.
That just made me a little giggly, and I needed that today.

Posted by: Gweny at November 29, 2005 4:20 PM

I can't stop laughing... LOL

Posted by: Molly at November 29, 2005 5:14 PM

Thos illustrations are totally creepy - but I did your pics - ha. Lovely.

Posted by: Carrster at November 29, 2005 6:18 PM

Oh, man, that is the best sign language ever! I want to sign up for your course :)

Posted by: Stephanie at November 29, 2005 8:12 PM

that guy looks EXACTLY like my dad!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*just kidding

Posted by: lizabetty at November 29, 2005 9:15 PM

I work at a day care with 3mo-2 year old children. We use signs to help them communicate and it really does work wonders. Plus Mia will look that much smarter... And that mustache guy? That really is too creepy.

Posted by: Angela at November 30, 2005 12:04 AM

THAT is hi-LAR-ious. :)

Posted by: Zandria at November 30, 2005 12:58 AM

*faints* Good lord, I think I peed my pants

Posted by: nina at November 30, 2005 5:49 AM

Aghhh! You just destroyed my keyboard with that little montage. I should learn not to casually drink my coffee and check your site.

:) LOVE this post.

Posted by: lorelei at November 30, 2005 11:35 AM

Oh, how I needed that laugh. THANK YOU!!

Posted by: kara at November 30, 2005 2:34 PM

If I saw that cartoon man on the street and doing those signs, I would scream, run into a stationary store and throw some crayons at him. He needs color man!

Posted by: mrsmogul at November 30, 2005 6:06 PM

Totally late on this but ROTFLMAO!!!! OMG. When I used to dive, we had to use special sign language and my buddy would make up stuff like that all the time. Laughing underwater makes me mask leak.

Posted by: Jon in Michigan at December 1, 2005 2:57 PM

It's GREAT! I wish we would have really enforced it earlier. Lucas does 3 signs - "more", "please" and "hot". My favorite is please b/c he over emphasizes the sign and rubs his whole torso up and down while smiling and saying "peas?"

Posted by: HipMamaB at December 1, 2005 5:50 PM

That's hilarious. We taught our daughter to sign and it's been awesome. There are some good videos out there, and I don't recall seeing seventy's porn stars in those. Hehe.

Posted by: melissasunshine at December 4, 2005 11:42 AM

LMAO!!!! Chris I am busting a gut over here, LOLOL!! Thanks for the laugh!

Posted by: Tammy at December 5, 2005 1:24 PM