February 20, 2006

One-Track Mind

I've become boring. Okay, I know I haven't become utterly, totally, predictably boring. But I'm a little worried.

Yesterday, Beth and I had some friends over for lunch. And all we could talk about is being parents, and Mia, and all the good and bad stuff we go through on a daily basis. Basically, we've become those people...those people childless individuals and couples come to hate because all we can talk about, in our effortlessly mundane familial self-absorbtion, is our life with our kid. At least, I'm pretty sure that's how it looks to other people.

And here. Remember how I used to write about stuff other than being a dad? Yeah, neither do I but I have the archives to prove it. I used to ramble on a bit more about politics and music and random crap that got all up in my metaphorical grille. I guess I still do, but keystrokes are usually reserved for Mia-centric things these days.

On Thursday, for instance, I received an IM from Beth. We'd been a little concerned about, uh, Mia and her bathroom habits lately or, rather, the lack of one specific aspect for a few days.

Her: Poop!
Me: Poop!
Her: Wow. Look what our lives have come to.
Me: Poop!

I have always written and talked about the things that are most important in my life (excluding the times I've rambled on about bathroom etiquitte or they psychos I seem to attract, or course). And being a dad, well, that's the most important thing that's ever happened to me. So, honestly, I'm okay being really boring and having one topic of conversation 80% of the time. It's who I am. It's what's important to me. I'm a dad. Huh. Freaky.

If you'll excuse me, the cat has just decided to eat my oatmeal. She doesn't look real happy about her breakfast choice.

Posted by Chris at February 20, 2006 8:34 AM

I never wanted to be one of those people but sure enough I am.
Did you ever notice that when you are talking with other parents, even if you don't know that well, it becomes okay to discuss bodily functions and breasts and mucus plugs without feeling weird?

Posted by: Bill at February 20, 2006 8:40 AM

Not much in this world more important than being a parent. Relish it. When we get sick of it, we can do your archives. Actually, if you weren't so good at it, we might... A good writer writes what he knows. Poop is good. ;-)

Posted by: JuJu's Mom Linda at February 20, 2006 8:43 AM

Don't worry, you're not one of "those people." No matter what your posts are about, they're always engaging. Sometimes they're funny, sometimes they're thought-provoking ... and sometimes they're just about poop. It's all good.

Also, I could've told the cat that was a bad idea.

Posted by: Fraulein N at February 20, 2006 9:19 AM

Ha!! "poop" is my most overused word that hits my IM window.

Personally, I think you're doing fine. Truth is, we all are single-main-topic conversers. As a parent, your topic just shifts to Mia.

Course I'm writing this as Spencer dances arond the living room - pausing momentarily to stick out my hand for a high-5 as he makes another circuit around the couch...

Posted by: don at February 20, 2006 9:27 AM

you're not boring me one bit. i'm one of those weird* people who love hearing other people's funny kid stories. the kind that make most normal people roll their eyes and wonder when the really "important stuff" is gonna get discussed. meanwhile i'm all like, "really? he said home-made mommy instead of stay at home mommy? how.cute.is.that?!?" keep the mia entries coming, i say. in the long run, those will be the ones that matter the most.

*by weird i mean totally safe, non-threatening, non-internet stalking weird

Posted by: patricia at February 20, 2006 9:52 AM

I know what you're talking about. Since I'm at home with the kids all day, I am totally unable to converse with other adults.

But I can make up some killer kid songs at the drop of a hat!

Posted by: Chag at February 20, 2006 10:00 AM

I had a friend and his wife over this weekend. I grew up with this guy and I hadn't seen him since his wedding three years ago. They were here for three hours and we spent at least 30 minutes discussing "Sesame Street". They don't even have kids yet!

Posted by: Sarah at February 20, 2006 10:03 AM

Just wait. One day soon (if you haven't already!) you'll run across the guy who has NO business being a dad. (There are women like that, too.)

And then you can get all wound-up and ranty-like as you did in the past and COMBINE your current interest (MiaBean) AND the writing fun!


Posted by: Pammer at February 20, 2006 10:51 AM

LOL - poor Pixel. I went out for a MNO (Mom's Night Out) on Saturday - and seriously all us ladies could talk about were babies, Dr. Phil, Oprah and Regis & Kelly - it was a relief to know that I'm "normal".

Posted by: Marie at February 20, 2006 10:56 AM

I like hearing about your parent adventures. You're someone "cool" who has a kid, and is seeming pretty happy about it, which makes me think that parenthood is not the no-fun avalanche I anticipate in my current lifestyle where owning a dog is too much responsibility! :)

Plus, it sounds like she'll grow up to be a pretty fascinating person, so music/books/politics will probably naturally be more a part of daily life than, say, poop. :)

Posted by: susannah at February 20, 2006 11:07 AM

Maybe you could simply look at it this way... you have crossed a threshold, and you now understand people whom you never thought you'd understand. But, of course, it is something you have to experience for yourself first.

Kind of like heroin, but I would say, don't do that.

Posted by: jen at February 20, 2006 11:09 AM

I'm one of "those people" who avoid new parents like the plague because I don't care to hear the "my baby did this..." stories. You are definitely not one of those types of parents. Your stories are fun to read...if they weren't I wouldn't stop by every day still for the lastest Cactus installment. ;-)

Posted by: Krush at February 20, 2006 11:16 AM

Not boring - at least not to be or you wouldn't be coming straight into my mailbox each morning.

Posted by: ann adams at February 20, 2006 11:20 AM

Trust me, you're not boring! It's people like you who keep me sane. The only non-internet friend I can even relate to anymore is my best friend from high school. I mean, we were always great friends, but lost touch some when she had a baby a couple of years back. I guess we're much closer now that I have my little one. Now if I don't talk with her at least four times a week I go crazy. I feel the same way if I don't read all my favorite blogs.

Posted by: catbird at February 20, 2006 11:49 AM

I don't think it's bad at all that you talk about the things that affect your life, and that go on in your life on a daily basis. Mia is a damn good topic, I think!!! :) Better you know (and we know) you care a lot about your child, and are so proud of her, than not at all, right?

Posted by: Michelle at February 20, 2006 1:21 PM

I wasn't going to be one of those people either. Hubby and I actually had discussions before Maya was born about how we were going to stay cool and not be the people who couldn't carry on a conversation without mentioning the kids. Yeah, it didn't work out so well for us. I don't think it's being boring though, I think we're all just as cool. It is just different cool. I think our kids being our priority is a good thing. And you can talk about Mia and Poop and post pictures as often as you want and I will still read it.

Posted by: Melissa at February 20, 2006 1:21 PM

Oh man, this one hits home. For two years, I've tried to remain at least a little bit of the guy I was pre-kid. Turns out, he's nowhere near as interesting to me these days. There are growing pains, as I grow into the man I always thought I'd one day be, but I think the tradeoff is a pretty good deal.

Posted by: shane at February 20, 2006 1:33 PM

Yeah... but just think... the other half (the parents) are happy that you're that guy - cuz they wanna hear it!
How ironic that you posted this... just the other day I was thinking about how boring non-parent-talk is. Who cares about inconsequential things like news and politics and gas prices when there are BABIES to talk about?!? ;) He he

Posted by: Jaime at February 20, 2006 4:02 PM

Yeah, us parents. We all end up there--no matter how time we played the We'll never be those parents mantra.

Oh well... at least you are in good company. Right?

Posted by: Bethany at February 20, 2006 5:04 PM

I can't remember the last non-child topic conversation I've had in a long time. Even when the hubby and I are alone, we can't seem to stop talking about the kids.

Some of our childless friends LOVE to hear about them.. others try to change the topic as often as possible.. Its part of being a parent.. Nothing wrong with it! :)

Posted by: molly at February 20, 2006 6:07 PM

I don't think your boring or I wouldn't keep coming back.

Posted by: Amy at February 20, 2006 7:01 PM

I know what you mean. We realized we were sure to become "those people" when we started talking all about our dog. Luckily most people we know either have kids or dogs or both.

Its difficult not to talk about it because those little people are just so funny and entertaining. I can't wait to hear what she says when she starts talking.

Posted by: Lisa B at February 20, 2006 7:37 PM

If you'd just stop with the salmon 'n' raisin oatmeal, you wouldn't be having this cat problem.

Also? POOP!

Posted by: shelley at February 20, 2006 8:00 PM

Yeah, I think you can tell by the number of posts you get on a regular basis that you're not boring. You don't talk about being a father all of the time either - there's a difference between talking about your daughter all of the time and talking about the quirks of fatherhood.

Posted by: Beth in StL at February 20, 2006 8:51 PM

I understand compeltely.....it seems that Poop is all we talk about sometimes as well.....

- Jon
- Daddy Detective
- www.daddydetective.com

Posted by: Jon at February 20, 2006 9:36 PM

Congratulations on being an involved father - it's the most important thind you could possibly do!

Posted by: Nicole at February 20, 2006 11:08 PM

Yeah, we've become one of those couples too. If we surround ourselves with each other we'll never notice, plus the fact that all our childless friends will slowly dissapear.

Two voice mails today, and two returned phone calls, relaying nothing but the news that my little girl finally went in the potty!

Twice. - oh and an e-mail to bring home a couple things from the grocery store. So it's not all about our daughter. There's food too!

Posted by: Scott at February 20, 2006 11:36 PM

no its all as it should be! those moments are grand. enjoy every one of them.


Posted by: melanie at February 20, 2006 11:47 PM

no its all as it should be! those moments are grand. enjoy every one of them.


Posted by: melanie at February 20, 2006 11:47 PM

I beg to differ. I think you are anything BUT boring. Heck, look at all the readers (including myself) who keep coming back to this blog to see whats up with you! Frankly, if you keep insisting you're boring I'm going to take it as a personal insult. It's like you're telling me I have no taste in blogs, lol. I have impeccable taste! :P

Posted by: Kestrel at February 21, 2006 12:55 AM

Hey what do you know, I speak poop also.

Posted by: Emily at February 21, 2006 1:49 AM

It's hard to have a lot of other interests when the baby is young also because they tak up sucj an enormous amount of time.

So there's less for other stuff.

Posted by: That Girl at February 21, 2006 11:39 AM

Ow, I remember it well. An animated discussion with the other half regarding the meaning of a particular shade of green appearing in her nappy really drove it home that yes, I am a Mammie now.

Little Miss' feces are on much more friendly terms then I could ever imagine I would be. (I go al "Yaaay! That's a perfect pooh!!" ..... I need help!

The one track subject? I am mortified to say that I think my colleagues have stopped asking after my daughter for fear of the ramble.
I always said I wasn't going to be "one of those" mams..... Ah well! ;-)

Hope being back in work isn't too bad for you!

Have a great one!

Posted by: Nynke at February 22, 2006 5:45 AM

I told you this would happen! And it really is great isn't it? To me, 80% of any pre-kid stuff I would have written about seems so unimportant now...and even less entertaining!

Posted by: Kelly at February 22, 2006 3:40 PM

Like you said, you have to write about what's important to you and what you know. If you were trying to purposefully NOT do that, it would be worse. :)

Posted by: Zandria at February 22, 2006 10:52 PM