February 28, 2007

The Horror!

The world has gone mad. Mad I tell you. I was surfing around, minding my own business until I came face to face with evil...in the form of a Google ad.

coulterposter.jpg

I'd rather have a poster of G-Dubs, our fearless leader. Hell, I'd rather have a poster showing Karl Rove blowing a donkey while John Ashcroft gives Rick Santorum the reach-around while performing a stunning rendition of America The Beautiful with a background choir comprised of all nine scantily-clad Supreme Court justices being serviced by evil clowns and midgets with mullets dressed in polyester leisure suits.

That's how much I do not want that poster.

Posted by Chris at February 28, 2007 7:28 AM
Comments

Maybe they mean "stunning" in the sense of "a deer caught in the headlights" type stunning...

Posted by: E :) at February 28, 2007 7:43 AM

You know I have one of those Mary Madeline/James Carville marriages. And guess what? Yep, Hubby would LOVE that poster!!!

Posted by: Maribeth at February 28, 2007 7:48 AM

Witty?

You could always throw darts at it, but then again, so not worth the money. It baffles me that someone would buy a poster of her. Who would do that?

Posted by: nila at February 28, 2007 7:49 AM

Somehow I get the feeling you REALLY don't want that poster.....

Posted by: Heather at February 28, 2007 7:49 AM

I think Rush Limbaugh will have one over his bed.

Posted by: Jon (was) in Michigan at February 28, 2007 8:15 AM

This one bothered you so much you couldn't wait until Friday ;-)

Do people really think she is witty? Perhaps, this was a joke. Did you click the link?

Posted by: Maria at February 28, 2007 8:34 AM

I fully expect one day for Coulter to rip her face off and expose a gaping, soul-sucking evil chasm. Maybe dozens of tiny, rabid Dick Cheneys will spew out.

Posted by: Nicole at February 28, 2007 8:34 AM

Yes a midget reference. Wait, darn, no hookers.

Posted by: William at February 28, 2007 8:38 AM

I want your sitemeter or google analytics results from THIS post...

Posted by: SciFi Dad at February 28, 2007 8:46 AM

Barf. Stunning and witty? That's just wrong!

Posted by: angela at February 28, 2007 8:50 AM

What if by stunning, they mean literally stunning. With a taser. Would it be more appealing that way?

Posted by: Phoenix at February 28, 2007 8:53 AM

Oh darn. I was going to send you one for your next birthday. Now what will I do? ;)

Posted by: suze at February 28, 2007 9:08 AM

Can I presume that you don't care for "she who will not be named"?

Posted by: ann adams at February 28, 2007 9:12 AM

The thing that worries me the most is not the fact you'd rather look at that poster...

than the fact you actually CAME UP with that thought...

Posted by: Secha at February 28, 2007 9:16 AM

terrifying. I think Cheney may even qualify as "stunning and witty" before she ever would.

the horror...

Posted by: platypotamus at February 28, 2007 9:17 AM

Good God. That's just plain wrong.

Posted by: Sassy at February 28, 2007 9:50 AM

I think I just horked a little. She is such a hack.

I think it would be a funny gag gift (if buying it wouldn't give her money of course) to put over a an uber-liberal's bed though.

I am so hilarious.

Posted by: Leah at February 28, 2007 10:10 AM

Hear, Hear!!! Thank you!!

Posted by: G-Love at February 28, 2007 10:11 AM

That has to be just about the last poster on earth that I can imagine wanting (I would only take her poster if the alternative was, say, a group of Satan worshipers making a baby-sacrifice).

For real, I have an extreme dislike for Ann Coulter. I saw her on Hannity & Colmes on Monday. They were talking about environmental issues, and had her and Daryl Hannah on (oooh, I love Daryl!). Ann kept repeating herself and mocking the way Daryl lives (renewable energy and solar panels), saying stuff like "Americans don't want to light their homes with candles." (She must have said that about 12 times, for real.)

I only watched Hannity & Colmes because I had to do it as part of my job. I say that because otherwise I want you to know that I have absolutely no desire to watch any of the shows on the FOX news channel. :)

Posted by: Zandria at February 28, 2007 10:55 AM

Ugh, Ann Coulter. I can't decide whether she's insane or simply the most hate-filled person on the planet. Either way....ugh. Hate!

Frankly, this whole post made my hiney clench, and not in a good way.

Posted by: FW Sunshine at February 28, 2007 11:13 AM

HAHAHAH. Btw, if you find that poster, let me know. But only if Rick Santorum is giving Dubya a rusty trombone.

I think it would make a nice addition to our office in our new house when we find it.

Posted by: statia at February 28, 2007 11:18 AM

She's a hateful, hateful bitch who needs a huge dose of her own medicine. There's a great website called "NewsHounds: We Watch FOX So You Don't Have To". Every time Coulter makes a misstep or is caught in a lie, you can find it there. Down here there's a place called Coulter's Barbecue. She's totally ruined it for me, and you know how much Texans like barbecue.

Posted by: wordgirl at February 28, 2007 11:32 AM

The very thought of it makes me want to bleach my eyeballs.

But uh, yeah. What the hell is wrong with the world? Who broke it? Because things are going nuts.

Posted by: Sparkle Pants at February 28, 2007 12:49 PM

I think if we leave out the donkey and just have Rove blowing Ashcroft we could probably get that whole scene going. But I must say, as an amateur photographer, I can't think of anyone willing to take that shot!

Oh man, I said take the SHOT! Ewwwww

Posted by: Jeff A at February 28, 2007 12:52 PM

You mean, the poster that essentially looks like this?

~o|o~
|
|
|
/ \

Posted by: oakley at February 28, 2007 1:31 PM

Oh whoops. It's a little off...but you know what I mean.

Posted by: Oakley at February 28, 2007 1:35 PM

I wonder how many hits you'll get from typing "Karl Rove blowing a donkey".

Posted by: Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah at February 28, 2007 1:36 PM

OK, once, in junior high, I drew a picture of the (unpopular)principal and the most hated science teacher in positions very, very similar what you just described.

No big deal, right?

Until the principal intercepted the drawing as it was passed around the school and I was identified as the ARTISTE!!!

Yeah, that was a pretty awkward meeting in the principals office.

I should have asked for it back so I could sell it on eBay.

Posted by: Trix at February 28, 2007 1:51 PM

Except, if you got it, you could then do disrespectful things to it. Like draw a mustache a horns on it! (What did you think I meant, you perv?)

Posted by: Vaguely Urban at February 28, 2007 2:15 PM

Pass the brain bleach!

Posted by: Fraulein N at February 28, 2007 2:38 PM

God, you are funny.

Posted by: Julie at February 28, 2007 3:08 PM

So, shall I have it framed before I send it? ;) heehee

Posted by: Nanette at February 28, 2007 3:57 PM

Sooooo many things I could say to this, but as I respect the family like environ you have created here, all I will say is, "boo on you Mann Coulter."

Posted by: JackassJimmy at February 28, 2007 4:22 PM

So I guess you're not gona buy that poster. Am I right, Chris?

She does look like a guy, so you know I'm not gona buy it, because I'm not gay!

Posted by: RC at February 28, 2007 4:46 PM

You kill me. I'm practically crying I'm laughing so hard. Fitting all of that into one mental picture is very impressive!

Posted by: bad penguin at February 28, 2007 5:30 PM

Yeah, that is a scary thought - both posters!

Posted by: Heather at February 28, 2007 5:37 PM

Always try and look on the bright side. It could be a NUDE poster of Ann Coulter. Ugh. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Posted by: JayMonster at February 28, 2007 5:49 PM

Sorry, I saw "Ann Coulter" and glazed over but let me just say Snow Patrol! Yay! about your sidebar goodness there.

Posted by: Bridget at February 28, 2007 8:28 PM

wow...you REALLY don't want that poster.... ;) Can't say I blame you! I sure as hell don't want it!

Posted by: Haley-O at February 28, 2007 11:03 PM

Ever checked this page out?

http://ifuckedanncoulterintheasshard.blogspot.com/

Posted by: Lani at March 1, 2007 12:12 AM

ummmm ... i'd prefer the ann coulter poster.

Posted by: s@bd at March 1, 2007 10:03 AM

We have the Karl Rove/donkey poster framed in our living room. It's a real conversation starter.

Posted by: whit at March 1, 2007 11:35 AM

You don't sound sold on the idea.

Posted by: Annie at March 1, 2007 11:03 PM

"These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by grief-arazzis... These self-obsessed women seemed genuinely unaware that 9/11 was an attack on our nation and acted as if the terrorist attacks happened only to them... I’ve never seen people enjoying their husbands’ deaths so much."

AAAHAHAH! Oh my God, hoooo! Dr. Pepper through the nose. Oh, that broad. HI-LAR. She could go toe to toe with old skool Richard Pryor.

In all seriousness, witty? Stunning? She is uglier (on the inside and out) than Satan's asshole, which, admittedly, I haven't seen, but I'm sure is just awful.

Posted by: Jurgen Nation at March 2, 2007 6:16 PM


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