February 6, 2007

Facts! Get Your Fresh Hot Facts!

My brain is firing random neurons through my synapses and, as such, I figured I'd fire some random odd facts your way this Tuesday morning. Never let it be said that I can't be educational.

  • The largest island in the world is Greenland. 81% of this parliamentary democracy is covered by ice. This explains why only 57,000 people live there. But it doesn't explain the name. At one point in its rich and cold history, Greenland was once a warmer place.

  • A 30-second ad spot during the Super Bowl cost advertisers around $2.5 million. Each player on the Colts earned an estimated $73,000. Players on the Bears hauled in a measly $38,000. The Super Bowl trophy, by the way, costs a cool $25k and the rings run about $5,000 a piece.

  • The ball-point pen was reportedly designed by Galileo, although the first patent was issued to the unfortunately-named inventor John J. Loud (ironic, considering that he made his name developing a writing implement) in October of 1888. The pen is commonly referred to as a "biro" after Laszlo Biro who, with his brother, largely reinvented the pen after Loud's design proved, well, crappy.

  • 72% of women report having faked orgasms at some point in their lives (hopefully during or immediately after having sex). 55% of men say they can tell. 24% of men - according to the same survey - reported faking their orgasms. While the statistic isn't specifically reported, I'm guessing 100% of women were somehow clued in.

  • Actor/director Orson Welles founded the Mercury Theater, famous for radio productions of famous literary dramas as well as The Shadow and War Of The Worlds, not to mention eventual involvement in Citizen Kane. One of the acting troupe's regulars was Agnes Moorehead. Despite receiving an Oscar nomination in 1942, Moorehead was most notable for acting opposite two Dicks - York and Sergeant. Yep, she played Endora, the meddling mother-in-law on Bewitched.

  • Bill O'Reilly is a dumbass. Okay, that's not exactly a stretch. But during the recent lawsuit in which he was accused of sexual harassment, it came to light that he's in dire need of a dictionary. At one point he expressed to his victim that he wanted to get her in the shower and rub her down with a falafel. He meant loofah.

  • Some celebrities have really strange real names. Did you know, for instance, that Cary Grant's real name is Archibald Leach? The first B in B.B. King's name stands for Riley (I can't say I really understand that) and Kirk Douglas was originally known as Issur Danielovitch. Snoop Dog? His real name is Cordazer Calvin Broadus, bitches. Lady-killer Tony Curtis was dubbed Bernard Schwartz at birth. And how Whoopi Goldberg made the transition from Caryn Johnson, we'll never know.

  • 10cc, the band known for such hits as I'm Not In Love and The Things We Do For Love (you'd know them if you heard them) was named for the average amount of, um, number three produced by the average man.

  • Last Thursday, I attended a conference during which I met a female, Africa-American midget. And I forgot to tell you until now. What's up with that?

Consider yourselves edumacated.

Posted by Chris at February 6, 2007 7:23 AM

I'm gonna use that ball-point pen one at work today.

If 55% of men can tell that women are faking orgasms, why aren't they doing a little more to make it so that women don't feel the need to do that any more? :-)

Posted by: Alissa at February 6, 2007 7:52 AM

How did I ever live so long without knowing all of this? Thank you, Chris. Another day without knowing this and I'm not sure I could have made it!LOL

Posted by: Maribeth at February 6, 2007 7:55 AM

"Falafel"! That is hysterical.

How could you forget to tell us?

Here are a few random "strange" NY facts for you: (because you asked, didn't you? :-))

You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand.

Anyone swimming in a NYC pool must have mesh lining in their swimming trunks. [Who's checking and why?!]

It is against the law to leave a mannequin undressed in a shop window, but it is legal to used underwear.

Posted by: Maria at February 6, 2007 7:56 AM

I can never think of the band 10cc again the same way.

I think I might like being rubbed down with a Falafel better than a loofah.

Posted by: Debbie at February 6, 2007 7:58 AM

Wow. I thought the only thing I was going to learn today was about astronauts wearing diapers. I was so wrong.

BTW, I heard somewhere that the vikings called greenland and iceland those names to trick people to travel to greenland to settle and leave iceland alone. Iceland is actually quite green and fertile. Or I could just be full of shit.

Posted by: Nicole at February 6, 2007 8:05 AM

Gah! I meant to say:

It is against the law to leave a mannequin undressed in a shop window, but it is legal to "sell" used underwear.

Posted by: Maria at February 6, 2007 8:17 AM

There is nothing wrong with getting falafeled in the shower.

and Yes a post with a midget reference.

Posted by: William at February 6, 2007 8:41 AM

number three? Too funny

Posted by: ktjrdn at February 6, 2007 8:52 AM

10cc is really named for that?! How did that piece of trivia escape me for so long. Oh, I'm so playing them on my radio show tonight... I can hear the fodder...:)

Posted by: martin at February 6, 2007 9:04 AM

Mmm, falafel rub ... both invigorating and tasty!

Posted by: Fraulein N at February 6, 2007 9:05 AM

You are a hoot at a party aren't you? I bet you are killer on trivial pursuit too. BTW I like your new picture on your blog it is official now you are HOT!

Posted by: Patrice Vicory at February 6, 2007 9:05 AM

Oh, I seriously think Bill really did mean falafel. He's just that kinky.

And I'm totally shocked that you didn't have comments on the female astronaut that was arrested! What a bizarro world story!

10cc.... cool.

Posted by: coolchick at February 6, 2007 9:07 AM

Bill O'Reilly + falafel rub = I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.

Posted by: Kelly at February 6, 2007 9:10 AM

Totally giggling over 10cc.
And dude, I can't believe you forgot until today. Shows how stressed you've been.
I sense a NASA-themed Schadenfreude Friday coming up.

Posted by: Traci at February 6, 2007 9:15 AM

Wow, I totally feel so edumacated. Thanks Chris. And picturing Bill O'Reilly in the shower with a falafel...just awesome.

Posted by: Kate at February 6, 2007 9:18 AM

Nicole, I heard that about Iceland (which is a nice place to live, I've heard) and Greenland too. Must mean both of us are full of it.

"(hopefully during or immediately after having sex)"

Have you seen When Harry Met Sally?

Posted by: ann adams at February 6, 2007 9:24 AM

You crazy man! Did you go searching for all these facts today, or is it random stuff that you've come across and saved? Quite interesting, I must say. :)

Posted by: Zandria at February 6, 2007 9:39 AM

Thanks for sharing. At least now I feel like I accomplished something today - I learned some new things - because I have a feeling little else will actually be accomplished. I'm too tired.

Posted by: Jessie at February 6, 2007 9:48 AM

Bruce Lee's real name? Lee Jun Fan.

Posted by: wordgirl at February 6, 2007 10:35 AM

1-I love "i'm not in love". Damn good song.

b-I think Greenland and Iceland switched names to throw off invading enemies. I do believe that was the story.

iii-Falafel? Amateur. Let's get some Baklava or Spanokopita going, and THEN see who's still standing, O'Reilly.

Posted by: andy at February 6, 2007 10:38 AM

Ok... I also heard the Iceland/Greenland thing.

I have to agree.. if guys know we fake, why aren't they doing something about it? And, um, yeah, I think we would notice if guys faked it...

Guess Falafel's not gonna be included in my diet any more... Thanks.

Posted by: Karen at February 6, 2007 10:45 AM

Greenland is covered in ice and Iceland is green. That's how I remember which on is which.

You fail to mention that Josten's, the folks that make most of our high school class rings, is the maker of Super Bowl rings.

The one and only time--actually it's two--I've ever watched O'Reilly was the the switcheroos with Colbert Report. Put that with a falafel...and now I'll never again eat a falafel. Thanks, man.

Posted by: oakley at February 6, 2007 11:19 AM

The pen is COMMONLY referred to as a "biro"?

And I so miss the other picture of you...I liked it much better.

Posted by: fauve at February 6, 2007 11:24 AM

I always thought #3 was when you barfed, peed and had diarrhea all at the same time.

Posted by: Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah at February 6, 2007 11:57 AM

yes.. that was all kindsa hotness.. :P

Posted by: debbie at February 6, 2007 12:32 PM

Did you know that in the movie "His Girl Friday," Cary Grant makes a reference to a man named Archie Leach, his name in real life? He also refers to his ex-wife's fiance as a man who looks like actor Ralph Bellamy - the actor playing the man WAS Ralph Bellamy. Great movie.

Posted by: Beth in StL at February 6, 2007 12:42 PM

Oh how I love me some facts. #3 is a term I hadn't heard before. Makes sense.

And the faking it thing...really? 24% of the female population is that honest about their orgasms. Shoot, there are just some days you don't have the time to wait around.

Posted by: MammaLoves at February 6, 2007 12:44 PM

superbowl ads in canada only cost $100,000...which would explain why we have crappy commercials that usually involve talking beavers or some such shit.

Posted by: ali at February 6, 2007 1:48 PM

Those stats on the Super Bowl stuff are CRAZY!

Posted by: Emily at February 6, 2007 2:00 PM

I love random facts! I mean I LOVE them. And I did know most of those but seeing them assembled together on your site made them seem so much more, I don't know, COOL!

And I like the new pic, too! Handsome!

Posted by: trix at February 6, 2007 2:17 PM

Was that all just floating around in your head? Because if so, I am *very* impressed.

Posted by: Heather at February 6, 2007 2:24 PM

Others have insinuated similar, but I think you are really assuming much when it comes to the Coulter...er Culture Warrior. The man's brain does not function in normal fashion.

The first "B" does not stand for Riley... He used to go by Riley "Blues Boy" King, and then later shortened it "B.B."


Posted by: JayMonster at February 6, 2007 2:26 PM

I've had "The Things We Do For Love" stuck in my head for about five days.

Posted by: Jodi at February 6, 2007 3:00 PM


okay, "#3"? hilarious.

Bill O'Reilly: Is that a falafel in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Fake it? Who...me? Just like I've always said, "If I'm going to fail a test because I didn't study, then it's my own fault...I'm not cheating." So in that regard, I'm thinking, "Beige, I'll paint the ceiling beige."

Posted by: kristen at February 6, 2007 3:26 PM

I happened to catch the view last week when Whoopi was on....she told the origin of her name. Since all I could remember was the part about her mother telling her no one would respect her with a name like Whoopi Cushion, I looked it up.
Here you go:
"A week-long sojourn to San Diego turned into a six-year stopover, during which time she helped found the San Diego Repertory Theatre and joined several struggling improvisational troupes. It was during the San Diego chapter of her life that Johnson chose for herself an offbeat stage name: "The name came out of the blue. It was a joke. First it was Whoopi Cushion. Then it was French, like Whoopi Cushon. My mother said, 'Nobody's gonna respect you with a name like that.' So I put Goldberg on it." /end quote

Posted by: Nanette at February 6, 2007 4:07 PM

Anyone else just read along, enjoying the writings of Chris.. only to be slapped in the face by the last one?

I laughed my ass off.

Rude of me? Maybe, but oh well. How often do you see "African-American midget" in print?

Posted by: Jen, South Florida at February 6, 2007 5:01 PM

Nanette...I saw that segment on the View. Whoppi said that she got her name while doing some stage show where she the accomodations were quite small and she had no privacy. I guess she is a gassy person cause she earned her nickname Whoopi Cushion and later changed to Goldberg on her moms suggestion. I guess her baby had a little gas ;)

Posted by: mad mom at February 6, 2007 5:02 PM

I really hope I don't have some wacked out dream about Bill O'Reilly in the shower with a falafel now that it's in my subconscious!

Posted by: Bayou at February 6, 2007 6:26 PM

man i thought i was going to be the first to mention the vikings tricking everyone about greenland, but i guess i was wrong.

Posted by: Phoebe at February 6, 2007 7:06 PM

So are there any bands named 36DD?

Posted by: Liz at February 6, 2007 7:25 PM

Well, if number three is...what it is, then what is vomit? I always thought it was number three.

Posted by: Stephanie at February 6, 2007 7:36 PM

Midgets and falafels. Seriously, this is why you are one of the first blogs I read.

Posted by: Hygiene Dad at February 6, 2007 9:50 PM

I love useless info! :-)

Posted by: Stephanie at February 7, 2007 12:15 AM

10cc rocks!

Life is a minestrone
Served up with parmesan cheese
Death is a cold Lasagna
Suspended in deep freeze

Posted by: Jeff A at February 7, 2007 12:58 AM

Did you know that orgasm and ejaculation are not always mutually exclusive? Not commonly seperate, but occasional... we do have a few men out there who can do one without the other.

However, I highly doubt it's anywhere 24% of them.

Oh baby! Fub that falafel all over my body... oh yeah... right there.. slide it just... oh.. ohh... *blushes* Sorry. But after the previous bit I was commenting I could resist. I love falafel, but I can't see if getting me all hot and bothered. Maybe Meg Ryan?

Maybe Whoopi wanted to be Jewish?

Posted by: Debra at February 8, 2007 4:25 AM

Oh ack! Look at all my typos! haha I see upon reading the comments though that someone else thought of When Harry Met Sally.

Posted by: Debra at February 8, 2007 4:34 AM

Did you know greenland belongs to denmark.

I acctually saw a midget for the first time at a consert at our local hells angels. He was an hells angel to, i did not dear to talk to him...

Posted by: VVV at February 8, 2007 9:20 AM

Looks like we're having loofahs for dinner again!

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