July 25, 2007

24 Hours Of The Weird and Terrifying

Okay, so, I worked about a gazillion hours yesterday so forgive me for the brief and somewhat lame post. Still, I've seen some weird and terrifying shit in the last 24 hours.

Weird: The number of grown men I saw yesterday walking around downtown DC wearing cowboy boots.

Terrifying: The eight hour meeting I sat through yesterday. The one that was originally scheduled to last five hours. Those extra three? Hell on earth.

Weird: Seeing a business man pick up a hooker at 9:00 in the morning.

Terrifying: The number of emails I had in my inbox following aforementioned eight hour meeting.

Weird: The preview for the movie Stardust in which Robert DeNiro plays what looks to be a swashbuckling captain of some flying ship thingy (the technical term, I'm sure). I can't help but thinking of him in Taxi Driver. Somehow I can't see see him pulling off the swashbuckling thing.

Terrifying and Weird: The meeting I was in yesterday? One of the participants brought a teddy bear. I shit you not.

Weird: The fact that drinks cost a fortune in the city with the notable exception of street vendors. Everywhere else, you'd pay through the nose. The street vendors charge 50 cents a drink. File that away if you ever visit DC.

Terrifying: I spotted an interesting truck during my commute. A moving truck. The name of the company? Wrongway Movers. That can't be a good sign.

Weird: The message written into the back of another dirty truck during the same commute - "Do you know Jesus? You really should. He's the real deal. And Jesus said unto the people, wash my truck bitches, for it is dirty."

I'm off to work another gazillion hours. Wish me luck.

Posted by Chris at July 25, 2007 7:04 AM

Chris, you never fail me. I have a headache and I have to go to the bar exam 1.5 hours early for registration. THE SECOND DAY.

But you made me laugh with the last weird one. You, sir, are an officer AND a gentlemen. Or something, cos I only know that from the Simpsons....

Posted by: alektra at July 25, 2007 7:35 AM

man, i'm glad i didn't have YOUR day! love the jesus thang.... and that dude picking up a hooker at 9? well i was on a business trip (in my younger days--i was 19), staying at a pretty swank hotel in san francisco... waiting for my ride to come for a meeting...it was like 7:30! and this dude looks at me with questioning eyes...(how much?).. i almost snarfed my coffee! and told him he couldn't afford me!
what kind of meeting (other than some new age, get in touch with your feelings) constitutes bringing your teddy bear?

Posted by: the unicorn at July 25, 2007 7:41 AM

I think the flying ship thingy is called a zepplin... I could be wrong.

8 hour meetings should be banned. Did you guys at least order some food or something?

Posted by: Phoenix at July 25, 2007 7:59 AM

Someone brought a teddy bear? I'd stay far away from that person. I guess that helped them cope with the insane 8 hour meeting thing. I can hardly sit through a 2 hour meeting.

You have an interesting commute.

Posted by: nila at July 25, 2007 8:31 AM

A teddy bear? To a meeting? That is very strange.

So, not alot of people in DC wear cowboy boots? Because here it's more strange to see a man in dress shoes or sandals--boots are the norm, no matter the weather.

Posted by: Alissa at July 25, 2007 8:36 AM

If Jesus had owned a truck, he totally would've been saying that to the apostles.

Posted by: You can call me, 'Sir' at July 25, 2007 8:45 AM

Maybe the person who brought the teddy bear was expecting to be able to snooze during the meeting. Hell, at eight hours I think you actually deserve a nap.

And that Jesus message is about 83 kinds of awesome.

Posted by: Fraulein N at July 25, 2007 8:48 AM

I love cowboy boots, I think I live in those and little else when it's hot out. Now explain the teddy bear. Was this a meeting of the local chapter of forbidden comforts or what? What did you bring, Chris?

Good luck in the next twenty-four hours! You will need it if life is that weird down there. :)

Posted by: Bridget at July 25, 2007 8:51 AM

My friends' neighbours collect teddies. They are in their 40s and have no children. When they eat out they call the restaurant and say 'table for 4, but only 2 of us are eating' and take teddies. My friends went round for dinner and said the teddies (not all of them, they have several hundred) sat at the table and were served up food. They are lovely people, just a bit odd...

Posted by: Katherine at July 25, 2007 9:00 AM

Name of the movers I used to hoist a sofa in through the window of my old apartment? Deathwish Piano Movers. Deathwish. I kid you not.

Posted by: shelley at July 25, 2007 9:40 AM

The message on that truck totally made my day!

Posted by: Much More Than A Mom at July 25, 2007 9:45 AM

San Francisco used to and may still have a moving company called Starving Students.

And their garbage company is called Sunset Scavengers. Honest.

Posted by: ann adams at July 25, 2007 11:25 AM

How could ANYONE have an 8-hour meeting!?! Our execs had a marathon 4-hour one once and that was a huge deal. I mean, I can barely sit in a 1-hour meeting.

Then again, yet another reason I am not aspired to move up into management. Heh.

And a teddy bear? Probably because he needed to hug something while crying for mommy around Hour 4 of that meeting. Next time, you up the ante and borrow Mia's Eeyore.

Posted by: oakley at July 25, 2007 11:27 AM

I read somewhere that, yes, Jesus did call the disciples "bitches". King James decided that the term was too colloquial so changed it to "disciples." Along with a lot of other stuff.

Posted by: Gwen at July 25, 2007 11:34 AM

Stardust is based on a Neil Gaiman book, and I'm confused about the thought of Claire Danes playing a star that has fallen to earth.

Posted by: samantha at July 25, 2007 11:43 AM

That last one cracked my ass up.

A teddy bear? Why exactly?

Glad to know more about that movie. Everywhere I turn, I see a poster, but I've yet to see a preview.

Posted by: Phoenix at July 25, 2007 2:24 PM

Okay, a teddy bear?


Posted by: Isabel at July 25, 2007 2:32 PM

LOL! I wonder where that guy got the Jesus bumper sticker - that's just too cool!

Posted by: Janice at July 25, 2007 2:45 PM

I really think you live in the twilight zone. No. Scratch that. Your life seems pretty awesome. It's work that seems a bit screwed up. ;)

Posted by: Tink at July 25, 2007 3:10 PM

Samantha - I love that book! I'm interested to see how off-base the movie will be.

Posted by: Arwen at July 25, 2007 4:03 PM

I think an eight hour meeting and a commute in DC traffic should get you some serious hazardous duty pay. That is all too terrifying for one day!

Posted by: MamaMaven at July 25, 2007 6:25 PM

OK, the Teddy Bear thing? That is truly scary.

Posted by: Sphincter at July 25, 2007 7:20 PM

Hey, if that person could bring a teddy bear to a meeting, you should be able to bring a shot of tequila. We all need to be soothed in one way or another, right?

Posted by: Librarian Girl at July 25, 2007 7:26 PM

Hey, if that person could bring a teddy bear to a meeting, you should be able to bring a shot of tequila. We all need to be soothed in one way or another, right?

Posted by: Librarian Girl at July 25, 2007 7:27 PM

I only have a Terrifying for you.

Terrifying: The number of people I have encountered lately who have the galloping stupids (e.g., don't think before they speak, lack tact/diplomacy, etc.).

Posted by: Maria at July 26, 2007 8:47 AM

Did the teddy bear have a name?

please say no, please say no, please say no

Too terrifying.

Posted by: ewe_are_here at July 26, 2007 10:34 AM

You're sure it was a hooker and not his daughter?

Posted by: sue at July 26, 2007 12:16 PM

Stardust is a beautiful book...anyone who enjoys Harry Potter would probably love it. Not sure about The Robert DeNiro thing though...the movie comes out shortly se we'll see.

Posted by: Clare at July 31, 2007 11:39 AM