April 2, 2008

Funkadelic (You Stole My Socks Uh-huh Uh-huh)

I've been in a funk. The weather's sucked, work has sucked and my attitude has sucked along with the rest of the suckage. It's been a big old suck fest in my head the last couple of days. I'm sure this has been reflected in my lackluster posts the past couple of days. But finally yesterday the clouds parted - literally and metaphorically - and the suck blew away. So to speak. It was helped by the fact that last night was just so flat-out silly, I couldn't help but laugh.

The evening started out innocently enough. With a conversation about Jesus.

Mia: Why are you clapping? (I don't recall why I was clapping.)
Me: I'm clapping for Jesus.
(Mia leaves the room - thank god.)
Beth: What are you talking about?
Me: Clapping. For Jesus. When his applause-o-meter hits a high point, it's common knowledge that he makes something good happen to us down here.
Beth: Uh-huh.
Me: Those $600 checks everyone's getting from the government? That's because of the clapping. Different colored Peeps at Easter? Clapping for the J-man.
Beth: You weren't really going to tell Mia that were you?
Me: She's got to hear the truth from someone.

Immediately after this, Beth and I came up with the crime fighting team of private investigators Cracker & Cracker. Their slogan? They're White, They Fight! The less said about that the better.

To cap it all off, the first shot was fired in The Great Sibling Conflict of 2008. Admittedly it was only a minor skirmish but it was the first of what I expect to be many battles. Mia stole Owen's socks. While he was wearing them.

She hipped us to this fact in the most obvious of ways - running around the kitchen holding Owen's socks yelling "I stole Owen's socks! I stole Owen's socks!" All this went down while Beth was talking to her mom, currently visiting family in California, while strains from bagpipes suddenly drifted through the windows we'd flung open earlier in celebration of the warm, sunny weather. And before you ask, yes, I said bagpipes and no, I have no idea.

It took me some time to get this funk out of my head. I hope I didn't drag you guys down with me. The internet's been a little quiet this week so I'm guessing I'm not alone. I ask you all - what's gotten you funked up lately and how did you get out of it?

Posted by Chris at April 2, 2008 6:25 AM

My dog won't get it on with her boyfriend and I want her to because we are planning puppies again. I am so funked up about it that I am all out.
I know I will feel better once she just gets laid!

Posted by: Maribeth at April 2, 2008 6:59 AM

re: Cracker and Cracker... who's their arch-nemesis? The evil genius Cheez Whiz?

If you still have residual funk, head over to my place and scroll to yesterday's post - particularly the comments. I ran an April Fool's post that was pretty OTT (I think) yet people actually believed my in-laws were trying to plan a black tie baby shower for our 2nd.

Posted by: SciFi Dad at April 2, 2008 7:06 AM

My funk was brought on by the huge dearth of medicines avaiable to those trying to achive pregnancy. I think it is a conspiracy - to make you look forward to the birth - when suddenly the full spectrum of drugs are welcomed back.

As for what make me happy last night, head over to my blog and see:)

Posted by: Amy at April 2, 2008 7:13 AM

I'm less funked up and more freaked out, as our baby is due in about 6 weeks, and I have 6 weeks of work to do (with a new BIG task added yesterday) in addition to all the stuff I have to do around here to get ready for her. And all of this without being able to drink a big glass/bottle of wine. In addition to being freaked out, though, I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. This is the coolest thing I've ever done.

Posted by: Jessie at April 2, 2008 7:30 AM

in a funk today. dunno why really. I guess lack of sleep and everyone yelling at me and spewing AGAIN :(

Posted by: mamacrow at April 2, 2008 7:43 AM

I'm funked out by my own lack of motivation for university, and then funked by the fact that I've got nothing done, and then I'm so down that I don't feel like doing anything...well, you can see how this little vicious cycle runs. Also, world hunger and the AIDS epidemic. The world kinda sucks. (/Suzy Sunshine.)

Posted by: Heather at April 2, 2008 7:43 AM

UGG this weather has created my funk... if its warm its raining, if its sunny its cold... is it too much to ask for Spring to just arrive already??
What brought me out of my funk... 2 great "good mood" emails from my husband this morning!! Although in one he admittedly had "gas" so him being at work and not with me at that point was enough to make me a happy camper.

Posted by: Stephanie at April 2, 2008 7:51 AM

I had a hard time getting past the phrase "and the suck blew away." Thanks for the laugh :-)

Posted by: Alissa at April 2, 2008 8:07 AM

HILARIOUS! I mean, if my fog hadn't also lifted just this morning, it certainly would have been gone by now. Bagpipes!

I think a series of things conspiring to keep me inside the house with a 2 1/2 year old, a 15 month old, a dog and a slowly but surely growing mound of laundry that I care not to deal with but cannot avoid (because we've been stuck in the house for reasons various and sundry). So what helped to lift the fog? A husband who offered to tackle as much of the laundry mound as he could between the hours of 9:00 and 11:00 PM, a new business venture for me, and of course a shower this morning. And sunshine. And big plans to go to story hour at Starbucks this morning. Story. And Latte. Happy.

Oh, and the crocus are blooming in my yard. Spring!

Posted by: chatty cricket at April 2, 2008 8:08 AM

Clapping for Jesus may have brought the bag pipes.

Posted by: william at April 2, 2008 8:16 AM

I think I need to start clapping for Jesus. Nothing else is working so it is worth a try.

Work and the never ending stomach virus in funking me up. I'm so tired right now I could pass out. I worked 28 of the last 48 hours. I'm going to try clapping for Jesus to get out of the funk. If that doesn't work, I'm going to try becoming a hermit for a few days. :-)

The Great Sibling Conflict of 2008 put a smile on my face.

Posted by: Maria at April 2, 2008 8:19 AM

Know whatcha mean about the funk... me, too.
Funked over home repairs due to a busted water heater that took over two months to fix and still isn't resolved, hubby's new job where he works 25 hrs a day 8 days a week, and being 43 with two teenagers and a 14-month old. But miraculously, one day last week the funk clouds broke with the silliest thing that a co-worker shared with me:

Weird, but it helped kill the funk. (And, BTW, I'm grateful I have a home, a hubby with a job, and three crazy wonderful kids to get funked over!)

Posted by: LJ at April 2, 2008 8:27 AM

I have been funked about the fact that End-of-Grade testing is coming up and I can't seem to find proctors. I am also funked about the sheer amount of work EOGs are, and nobody seems willing to cut me any slack on some of the less important things so the EOGs will go well! Lastly, I am funked because I just found out I have a herniated disc in my back.
So far, no signs of the funk clearing up.

Posted by: Kate at April 2, 2008 8:34 AM

Work and weather got me funked up. Friday night I worked until 11pm. That made me a little lax in watching the Toddler, who used the time appropriately to make potions in the bathroom sink.

The next day, I had to buy from the store:
Hair moisturizer (for her)
Face lotion (for me)
Hand soap (both of us)
Toothpaste (toddler kind, for her)
Toothpaste (grown-up kind, for me)
Toilet paper (mostly for me)
Stuff to unclog the drain

All the plastic blocks and bath toys survived in tact.

Posted by: jessica at April 2, 2008 8:38 AM

I don't know why, but I have also felt weird this week. I checked my biorhythms and they're right about my emotional slump. I guess we just go in cycles.

Posted by: claire at April 2, 2008 8:58 AM

I go outside and walk, breathe fresh air.
At least that is what I do to start getting unfunkified.

Posted by: blair at April 2, 2008 9:02 AM

Work worries related to the impending birth of baby pancake (don't ask...), concerns about money in some ways (I get paid based on the work I do essentially so when I am on maternity leave and not working well you get the picture!), not being a great friend the past couple of years, exhaustion from lack of sleep for no good reason other then being pregnant, WAITING FOR SPRING!, not being able to eat ice cream because it makes me sicker then a dog... Okay I am going to stop. Actually the funk recently lifted for me as well (like two nights ago so maybe it is some shift in the plants or the ocean currents - WHO KNOWS?!)

Posted by: Christina at April 2, 2008 9:02 AM

I think I'm just funked up in general. Maybe it's the unpredictability of spring weather. Maybe I need my meds adjusted. Who knows? I do know that your tales of bagpipe serenades (the hell?) and infant sock-stealing have made me feel a bit better. So, thanks.

Posted by: Fraulein N at April 2, 2008 9:05 AM

Clapping for the J-man...nice.

Yes the general consensus is that this week has been declared as the most Funked up week in awhile. We all got a taste of warmer weather here and had the carpet pulled out from us.

So I took my funk-atude and called off today. Hoping to be less funky....

Posted by: crookedeyebrow at April 2, 2008 9:29 AM

My funk? I woke up at 1am Tuesday and had what I thought was food poisoning. I got back in the bed at 2am just long enough for Summer to come in and throw her dinner up all over me (so not food poisoning). She had fish for dinner. I didn't sleep much and I had to take the day off work. Last night Mila and Summer wanted to sleep with us and Jason was in and out of the bed. I finally had to sleep on the couch. I'm running on 3 solid hours of sleep today. yuck.

Posted by: Mymilabean at April 2, 2008 9:32 AM

Hey, at least Mia's honest.

I'm in such a funk that I don't even notice it anymore. I hung out with some good friends Saturday night and they helped. Until they left. And the house was big and empty. Heh. Wine helps. OMG shoez helps. Okay, that actually helps a lot. Telling someone "I'm going to betch slap you shet bag" really helps. teehee

Posted by: Sparkle Pants at April 2, 2008 9:37 AM

Where should I start! LOL No, really the only thing is I asked for overtime, which I got but it's not happening as fast as they thought it would (deal with partner company) and as part of the deal I have to get an VoIP phone which doesn't even remotely fit on my desk as it's setup right now.

So this morning in trying to make it all work? Spilled 1/3 of my iced caramel coffee. All over the new VoIP phone.

This afternoon will consist of some major furniture re-arranging to make all the necessary parts all work together (two monitors, desktop, two phones plus another monitor and gear setup for when I work on someone's dead computer).

Sigh. Is it over yet?

Posted by: Michelle at April 2, 2008 9:43 AM

I've been in a funk over the extreme lack of spring like weather - hello? where is 75?

And fighting w/ school hasn't helped...

and then I was rudely awaken in the middle of the night by a ragin toothache! Did the orajel and motrin thing (neither helped), FINALLY got back to sleep only to be awaken again by a child needing to use the little girls room! oy!

Perhaps I should try clapping and bagpiping....

Posted by: Kris at April 2, 2008 9:58 AM

I used to get my little ones to "buckle up for Jesus" - there was something to the ring of it. 20 years later they still say it despite being the heathans they are.

Every once in a while we'd buckle up for de Jesus just to mix it up.

Posted by: Johnny Smoke at April 2, 2008 9:59 AM

Clapping for the J-man. I love you. That made my morning. And if Jesus is responsible for peeps, I might just have to become a satanist. Did you know that you can blow up peeps in the microwave? It's an Easter tradition left over from my days as a church Youth Director. They get huge (think the rabbit on Monty Python)and fat and then the minute it stops heating? It deflates into a rubbery mess (think the Wicked Witch of the West). Truly a unfunkifying activity.

And if the damn sun would just come out and it would STOP SNOWING ALREADY, I might be in a better mood. It snowed. A lot. Yesterday. Damnit.

Posted by: k8 at April 2, 2008 10:28 AM

I just wrote about this too. I'm convinced it is the weather. It just sucks. Big-time.

My kids are all grown. I need to borrow some to cheer me up...

Posted by: sue at April 2, 2008 10:45 AM

Cracker and Cracker...bagpipes....heeee

Posted by: Sue R at April 2, 2008 10:53 AM

Clapping for Jesus. I'm gonna have to try that.

I've got a cold, and Winter is acting like that single friend you have that won't leave despite it being 2 hours past your bedtime.

Posted by: Brad at April 2, 2008 10:56 AM

i *heart* bagpipes.

Posted by: jessica at April 2, 2008 11:04 AM

I was funked out last night and this morning, but my boy is awesome and totally helped me out of the funk by making me laugh. I love when he makes me laugh.

I didn't realize clapping for Jesus made good things happen! *clap clap*

Did Owen actually care that his socks were gone?

Posted by: Poppy at April 2, 2008 11:05 AM

The Hubby has been in a mood lately. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells around him, just waiting for his next nasty to be uttered, or his next opinion that has been engraved in in platinum and not about to be altered.


I love the Hubby, but good grief do I hate this mood. And his funk has me in a funk, now. I normally rely on him to help bring me up when I'm down, but my attempts to lighten his mood have failed.

So, short of slipping him some illegally-obtained anti-depressants mixed into his mashed potatoes, I have no idea how to break the funk.

Let me know if you figure out a way. And please don't let it involve illegal activities. I'm a mom now, so people tell me I have to be responsible.

Posted by: RC at April 2, 2008 11:11 AM

I don't think it's constitute a conflict if Owen doesn't cry once his socks were stolen. Heh.

I've been in a funk for 6 months, pretty much. Snapped out of it when I realized I have practically been sleepwalking since August as I was doing my paperwork for taxes. My cure was finding this little cartoon in my stacks of paper.

Posted by: oakley at April 2, 2008 11:19 AM

I've started blogging again. You might be able to guess when you read my first entry there. If not, then hello again :)

Posted by: Great Rambler at April 2, 2008 11:25 AM

Okay, yesterday Beth and I wrote matching posts and today you write this post after yesterday, my 3of3 ran around with Jesus & Jesus, hugging them and kissing them and saying, Come here, Jesus. I wuv woo.

I have photographic evidence.

Dude, you Cactus-Fish are creeping me out.

Posted by: Mr Lady at April 2, 2008 11:48 AM

Heh...that's one sly daughter you have there! It was an innocent shot across the bow for Mia. Owen doesn't have the ability to fight back so it's just mostly to get your reaction, me thinks.

And bagpipes: My brother plays the pipes. Just decided one day that it was something he wanted to do. He takes them outside to practice so as not to destroy his childrens' hearing from playing inside. They used to live in an apartment and he would go out to play and looked like the Pied Piper because the kids from the complex used to flock to listen to him play.

Can I tell you the sobs he ellicited when he played "Amazing Grace" at my grandma's funeral?

Posted by: zanie at April 2, 2008 1:12 PM

My funk is related to the fact that our house has been on the market for 7 months, no nibbles, and because of this my husband is commuting back and forth halfway across the country. I am tired of single parenting and I just want to live like a family again.

& though I whine, I realize our life could be much, much worse, so I try to shut my mouth and tell myself it really isn't that bad.

Posted by: Shelly at April 2, 2008 1:37 PM

The Cause(s):
Certain colleagues.
A certain CEO I don't report to.
The germs attacking my family.

The Fix:
I wrote my resignation letter and picked my date. Can't wait to fling it across the desk.

Tah dah! De-funkified.

Posted by: Pammer at April 2, 2008 1:46 PM

Funk? Currently the local funk is being caused by performance evaluations. It's that time of year -- performance evals prior to annual pay increases. It's an HR thang. Couple that with the onset of warmer weather. Bah! I wish it never got above 50 degrees.

Maybe Mia stole Owen's socks because she was biting his cute little toes!

Posted by: coolchick at April 2, 2008 2:32 PM

I have definitely been in a funk lately. Sometimes a good funk, sometimes a bad funk, sometimes a really confused funk. Most of it unpublishable because I was silly enough to tell my ex-sister-in-law about my blog.

The weather being gray and not quite warm isn't helping either. Hurry Spring!!!

Posted by: SassyPants at April 2, 2008 3:51 PM

As I mentioned a few days ago, totally funked about the weather.

Now I'm also funked over my latest illness. And our finances, which would funk out anyone. And my husband just called and told me that the dog's eye is all swollen up. So I'm funked about that too.

Funk funk funk.

Posted by: Alias Mother at April 2, 2008 4:49 PM

The yellow plague . . . I mean yellow pollen. Do you get that in your area?

It coats everything. Black cars look green. You can SEE it in the air. The only thing that helps is a deluge of rain, but, yeah, drought, so not so much hope of that (although March was quite wet, so maybe more hope than usual).

Even though the weather's nice I don't want the kids to play outside because sucking in all that pollen - not so good for reactive airways, and the youngest had a possible bad reaction to the albuterol, so I really don't need her to start coughing, but the weatherman says rain tomorrow, so maybe, do a little clapping for me and the rain will come and rinse the yucky yellow funk from my world.

Posted by: Meredith at April 2, 2008 5:11 PM

I'm totally funk-a-riffic over here. Allergies are kicking my ass, and my soon to be former bank is making my life hell. Oh, and I had a meeting spin out of control on me earlier today. People actually started getting hostile and combative with each other. That was a fun one to run. But I am actually starting to feel a little better.

Posted by: bad penguin at April 2, 2008 5:44 PM

I'm not funked up, I'm jacked up. I leave for Paris on April 15th and it finally hit me that OMGIAMGOINGTOPARISINTWOWEEKSIREALLYNEEDTOSTARTPLANNINGSOMESHIT.

Posted by: Teenuh at April 2, 2008 7:10 PM

I don't go to church, so maybe clapping for Jesus may be a good alternative. I hope your funk passes. soon. Funks are certainly funky and no fun!

Posted by: Nicole at April 2, 2008 8:38 PM

running like a chicken with my head cut off...

That funks me out... beside that, life has been good since I am not running like a chiken with....

Posted by: DavidR at April 2, 2008 9:24 PM

It does seem to be going around. I think mine was caused mostly by going home for 18 days and then having to return to Afghanistan.

However, I've always been slightly prone to the "funks" from time to time. Maybe it's just that time of year again.

What fixed mine this time? Something I usually would scream "HELL NO, We won't go!" about. Meds.

It's a temporary fix. But I guess they think that it's best to be in your right mind while carrying a weapon and stuff. :)

Posted by: Holly Selden at April 3, 2008 12:41 AM