May 15, 2008


I'm taking today and tomorrow off from work to catch up on some much needed rest and playing. So I leave you with the least thought-out post in the history of my 2520 entries. In fact, it's just all kinds of random.

  • There's someone out mowing right now. Not ordinarily an issue except it's 7:50. In the morning.

  • The best worst show on television has been canceled. Word came down that October Road is done. Dammit.

  • And speaking of television, the last CSI episode written by the Two and a Half Men writers was perhaps the worst thing I've ever seen on TV.

  • Okay, still on TV, I think I have an unhealthy obsession with both house hunting and house flipping shows.

  • Did you know there are porn sites for the deaf? I'm not talking about closed captioned porn. Who need porn's terribly written and largely irrelevant dialog subtitled? I'm talking about actual deaf people doing it while talking dirty using sign language. Look, I don't begrudge deaf people their porn but that's just silly.

  • President Bush actually stated that he was showing his solidarity with the soldiers in Iraq - and those who have died in that conflict - by giving up golf. Seriously. To quote, "I don't want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the Commander-in-Chief playing golf. I feel I owe it to the families to be as -- to be in solidarity as best as I can with them. And I think playing golf during a war just sends the wrong signal." Don't you think maybe leading the country and telling the truth would be a better way to honor the dead and those serving their country abroad? I've always thought he was stupid. Now I just think he's insane.

  • I'm 35 and a dad of two. I take a certain pride in the fact that I played my daughter an acoustic version of Iron Maiden's The Trooper last night.

  • I was surfing CNN's site yesterday when I noted a funny little icon next to a few of the stories. So I clicked through and found what is perhaps the silliest most useless thing on the internet - headline slogan shirts. Look -

    Can you tell me exactly why anyone would want to own such a thing?

Posted by Chris at May 15, 2008 7:51 AM

The best thing about the CNN shirts is that they're hackable within the URL. You've got to pay attention to the hash marks, but it's so much fun to make up your own headlines.

Posted by: amber at May 15, 2008 8:11 AM

No more October Road? Oh, no! That's an awesome show!

And, um, when we mow we always get started at about 7AM. That way you're finished before it's too hot outside. Of course, we don't have any neighbors, either...

Posted by: Alissa at May 15, 2008 8:15 AM

I have a question to pose to you Mr. Cactus...
Why o' why isn't it Friday at 4:00 yet??

Posted by: Stephanie at May 15, 2008 8:31 AM

I hated/loved October Road. That makes me sad. Dammit.

Deaf porn? Ok, whatever floats their boat, but, how much time and good moves are they wasting by throwing out signs with their hands!? Sex is a hands on sport!

I have no comment for Bush giving up golf other, what a sacrifice!

Posted by: js at May 15, 2008 8:39 AM

Only to show how stupid CNN is.

And dude... deaf porn is cracking me up now. I almost want to go out and find it so I can see how silly.

Nice riff, btw. The kids need to know their Maiden.

Posted by: Brad at May 15, 2008 9:05 AM

I'm 40 and a father of two and I bought Iron Maiden concert tickets for my son and myself.

Posted by: COD at May 15, 2008 9:07 AM

I think the CNN Headline shirt idea is BRILLIANT. Going to post about it now!

Posted by: Poppy at May 15, 2008 9:14 AM

I *have* that shirt!!

Okay, not really. Seems like wearing a shirt like that would invite a bunch of people to comment and ask why the wearer wasn't nekkid.

Posted by: Sarah at May 15, 2008 9:18 AM

We're raising our daughter with similar musical tastes. Her current favorite is Van Halen.

Check this out for Owen:

Music box reditions of many rock artists. We put together a disc via iTunes for our new neice. They are surprisingly non-creepy!

Posted by: Meg at May 15, 2008 10:07 AM

I saw the Bush golf thing too. Did you see his Dr Evil impression? Not very impressive. (The impression, not the evil.)

Posted by: jessica at May 15, 2008 10:18 AM

Because when you're a nude model who's been interviewed by CNN, the only way anyone will believe it actually happened is to show them the t-shirt. Basically, the shirt has a very limited market.

I am also obsessed with house-hunting and flipping shows. And I rent, with no forseeable plans to either purchase or renovate a home. Go figure.

Posted by: SpaceCase at May 15, 2008 10:24 AM

Maiden Rules! When Bear was in kindergarten and having a bad day at this stuffy private school he went to, you could tell by the way his little toes would drag and his little head would hang down. We'd "rock out" on the way home to cheer him up. Nothing says you love your kids like sharing some head banging time with them. : )

I think I might need that tee as a statement of how useless I think CNN is on most days.

Hope you have a great long weekend!

Posted by: OS at May 15, 2008 10:42 AM

I don't think they're hackable anymore. They pretty much had that fixed the day after the tees debuted because, hell, even Gawker had a contest about who could come up with the best hacked tee. I think they pretty much ruined all the fun for everyone. :D

October Road, yeah, I was so mad at that show. I didn't really like it but got sucked in when nothing else was on (because why turn off the tv when you can watch crap tv instead?). And now people will never find out that yeah, that kid is so that writer dude's. Obvious but I wanted to watch the fallout. Oh well. It probably wouldn't have been as good as I thought anyway.

I'm obssessed with the Food Network and I don't even cook. Second to that are all the house shows. Yeah, also don't own my own house too. I think this says something about me. Not sure what though.

Posted by: patricia at May 15, 2008 10:48 AM

Agreed with you on CSI writer swap. It wasn't a good CSI episode but does have some good jokes in it. But I thought the alien episode a few weeks ago probably has the worst writing.

As for the CNN headline shirt, I don't want it. The BBC headline, maybe. (Remember the screen cap I sent to you?)

Posted by: oakley at May 15, 2008 10:59 AM

Ah, so YOU were the one watching October Road. I'd wondered about that.

I love home-improvement and home-flipping shows too. I rent, but I try to justify it by pointing out all the knowledge I'll have when we do buy our first house. As if I'll actually remember this stuff.

Posted by: Fraulein N at May 15, 2008 11:10 AM

Did you hear the NPR story about the writer swap? Chuck Lorre says he left out the stupid puns but that the CSI actors insisted on putting them back in. Because murder and puns? That's a classic combination.

I also love houseflipping shows; especially when the people get burned. I'm too lazy to get off my butt and make money, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to have a good laugh at the people who aren't.

Did that last sentence even make sense?

Posted by: Alias Mother at May 15, 2008 11:54 AM

I watch House Hunters with Suzanne Whang whenever it is on! And what's worse, my kids watch it with me and we try to guess which house they bought. It's always so cheesy at the end because they always seem to be eating and/or entertaining and it's nauseatingly fake, but I still watch!

Posted by: Susan at May 15, 2008 12:19 PM

no! no more october road?!?!

Posted by: ali at May 15, 2008 12:54 PM

knowing that you can play Iron Maiden just makes me like you all the more. Not in an unhealthy way but in a more respectable man way!
I am trying to imagine how The Trooper would sound acoustically.

Posted by: Jeff A at May 15, 2008 12:55 PM

It's the 21st-century version of the 70s 'I'm with stupid' t-shirts, only in this case, the virtual arrow is pointing toward CNN.

Posted by: You can call me, 'Sir' at May 15, 2008 1:03 PM

Last CSI episode of the season or series? If it's series...that's a crappy way to go out.

I'm not sure what October Road is, but now I must check it out.

Posted by: Lani at May 15, 2008 1:13 PM

T Slogan:

"random asshat designs slogan T's for CNN"

(hmmm, it was funnier in my head)

Posted by: Holly at May 15, 2008 1:35 PM

One thing I have to say about our President. Just when I think that man has said the most stupid thing ever, and that I will never again hear or read anything that comes out of his mouth and be surprised by his stupidity, something like that comes spewing. And I'm surprised, again, by his stupidity. Shocked, actually. His stupidity makes my head spin.

Enjoy your 4 day weekend.

Posted by: Mindy at May 15, 2008 2:00 PM

I am surprised that no one else has mentioned this: Um do we even want to know how you know about the deaf porn thing?

And I can't even watch the new CSI preview/commercial that says WHERE IS WARRICK because I want to answer: In the desert outside of palm springs sleeping off his coke binge.

Posted by: Amy at May 15, 2008 2:31 PM

Oh I am so bummed about October Road. And you were right, it was the best worst show on TV. Now we'll never know if Sam was Nick's, but the past few episodes had me believe he was Eddie's. Bummer.

Posted by: April at May 15, 2008 2:38 PM

CNN headline shirts -- not so cool. But if the BBC news had a similar program, I would totally buy the shirt for this headline:

Posted by: Becky at May 15, 2008 5:04 PM

OK I am the Deaf reader...what is the URL for the deaf porn site? to me! I dont feel like googling it and clicking for hours!
Cheryl the Deafie
*Thanks for taking notice to "my kind" of people...though I have never signed during sex...I am too "oral" LOL..that was bad*

Posted by: Cheryl at May 15, 2008 6:52 PM

OK I am the Deaf reader...what is the URL for the deaf porn site? to me! I dont feel like googling it and clicking for hours!
Cheryl the Deafie
*Thanks for taking notice to "my kind" of people...though I have never signed during sex...I am too "oral" LOL..that was bad*

Posted by: Cheryl at May 15, 2008 7:36 PM

There are some serious cool headline writers good funny headlines writers out there. (Globe and Mail has some good ones from time to time... )

Posted by: Nat at May 15, 2008 8:57 PM

What? Did you say porn for the deaf? Whoa! Is that really necessary that they subtitle it? The words are meaningless anyway.

Posted by: Melinda at May 15, 2008 9:43 PM

I think I would laugh myself silly if I saw someone wearing headline shirts. Some headlines are ridiculous.

Posted by: Maria at May 16, 2008 4:34 AM

Porn for deaf. I never thought of that. I wonder what their signs are (but not enough to actually go watch it LOL).

Posted by: Nadine at May 16, 2008 8:47 AM

uh, um...the CNN Headline Shirts site was designed/worked on by TobyJoe, a very popular blogger's husband. Mihow/Michele (Toby's wife) mentions the situation here on her website, I think it's an utterly brilliant concept.

Posted by: RzDrms at May 16, 2008 12:07 PM

The golf quote KILLED me.

Posted by: Aimee Greeblemonkey at May 20, 2008 12:25 AM