June 3, 2008

I See London, I See France

Before I dive into today's post, I need to explain myself. In the timeless, age-old debate between boxers and briefs, I clearly come down in favor of boxers. Hands down, every time, as you shall see. I've got no love for the tighty-whiteys. They're uncomfortable and restrictive and they shall not darken my underwear drawer.

I bought new boxers over the weekend. Okay, I understand that your initial reaction is probably somewhere in the vicinity of the Greater So-What Metro Area but this is a blog-worthy event to be sure. To prove it, I now reveal to you the contents of my underwear drawer.

Figure 1. Seasonal sweat-your-balls-off boxers. Yes, they're festive but they're toasty.

Figure 2. To the designer of button-fly boxers - this was not your finest moment. My wang falls out of these.

Figure 3. Sure, silk is sexy and sophisticated and I do love these. I'm just not sure silk is the way to go for everyday wear.

Figure 4. Ruh-roh! Tigger and Scooby. I love them but they also fall into the silk category.

Figure 5. Are those hot peppers on your underwear or are you just happy to see me? Muy caliente!

Figure 6. Older than my daughter.

Figure 7. Older than my relationship with Beth. We started dating in 1993.

Figure 8. Onesical, twosical. My boxers are Seussical!

I'm averse to change by nature and, apparently, this trait extends to my underwear. I think you understand now why the purchase of a few new pairs borders on a life-changing event. Of course, I had help. I've come to learn that Beth was secretly throwing out a pair or two when I wasn't paying attention. Sometimes we all need a good shove.

Now it's your turn. What's your preference - boxers, briefs, panties, thongs? Or are you a commando kinda person? What's your favorite pair or your most embarrassing?

Posted by Chris at June 3, 2008 6:22 AM

I wear boyshorts underware, preferably. If that's not available, then Bikini style. The boyshorts are so much more comfortable, though, with the lack of elastic cutting into my hips. Yay for them!!

I like the chilli pepper boxers. ;)

Posted by: Secha at June 3, 2008 7:00 AM

Your undie drawer looks much like my husband's, and I, too, throw away a pair here and there. He says tightie whities are also the work of the devil.

I prefer the hipster style of underwear (I never call them panties... they're always 'underwear'... because I will never wear a size that is worthy of being called 'panties'...) because they fall below the belly button but yet keep my crochital area covered, as well as my rear-end. I hate underwear that comes up to my boobs or crawls up my ass.

And that, my friend, is more than you wanted to know about my underwear preferences.

Posted by: ironic1 at June 3, 2008 7:08 AM

Too funny, loving your blog. :)

Bikini briefs - though I've long harbored curiosity as to boxers.

Posted by: Hannah at June 3, 2008 7:09 AM

Too funny, loving your blog. :)

Cotton bikini briefs - though I've long harbored curiosity as to boxers.

Posted by: Hannah at June 3, 2008 7:09 AM

Big white granny-pants for me! You know those of Bridget Jones parachute ilk.

Posted by: Amber at June 3, 2008 7:13 AM

In my view, ideally underwear should have sleeves. I do not understand the concept of thongs and their ilk.

Posted by: Loth at June 3, 2008 7:20 AM

Did you throw any away?? that's my question.

No thongs - thanks anyway. Bikini, seamless design for no panty lines. Courtesy of Victoria's Secret.

Posted by: Debbie at June 3, 2008 7:20 AM

Well as long as we're all oversharing...strictly thongs for me....the idea of the big granny pants freaks me out and this is my little way of retaining "youth". I really hope that some of those boxers were given retirement status alla the garbage. My husband was the same way - I swear some of his boxers saw the 80's so we "lost" that box of stuff somehow in the move...it may have been labeled "garbage" by someone...although I can't speculate.

Posted by: Cass at June 3, 2008 7:51 AM

Commando. It's awesome.


Posted by: Edge at June 3, 2008 8:10 AM

I do that with Andy's boxers, too. Pitch a few at a time until he HAS to have more :-) But then I have to buy him some myself, because he'd NEVER get around to it.

Myself? I like cotton bikini style panties. Thongs if I'm not wearing jeans so there won't be a pantyline.

I can't believe I just posted that on the internet.

Posted by: Alissa at June 3, 2008 8:18 AM

My 3 yr old son likes to go commando... we have our hands full, no?

Me, I like comfy!

Posted by: Christina at June 3, 2008 8:26 AM

Boxers for sure, sometimes Commando. I had to wear tighty-whiteys for a few days after the Big "V" a few weeks ago, and will NEVER wear them again.

Posted by: Josh at June 3, 2008 8:28 AM

I love the boy shorts and Matt likes boxers. He doesn't like it when I call his boxers panties. Matt, in fact, hates that so much that I am forced by the Good Wife code to call them panties as much as possible. Just 'cause I can:-)

Posted by: Dee at June 3, 2008 8:31 AM

I am right there with commenter Debbie "Bikini, seamless design for no panty lines. Courtesy of Victoria's Secret." Thongs may scream youth as tehy do to Cass above but for me they scream, uncomfortable.

Posted by: Michelle at June 3, 2008 8:36 AM

First, I thought it was "TIDY-WHITIES" I guess I am just a neatnick!

Okay I like ladies "French Cut" undies. Cotton and covered eleastic.

Posted by: Maribeth at June 3, 2008 8:45 AM

Nice collection. First off, in my opinion, men should ONLY wear boxers. Briefs kind of make me want to hurl, no matter how hot the man sporting them is.

I only wear boy shorts. I have three drawers full of underwear. Now, every one in a blue moon I'll pop on a thong if I'm wearing white pants. And that doesn't happen often. My underwear drawer (of which I have THREE, and by the way the "P" word for women's underwear should be illegal...it makes me twitch) looks a lot your last photo. All fun and colorful. The drawer is bursting with boyshorts sporting skulls, koi fish, dragons, you name it. My daughter (she's 7) tells me that my underwear is more fun than hers. If I think about it hard enough I might find something wrong with that.

Posted by: js at June 3, 2008 8:46 AM

I am a bikini and thong kind of girl. Although every now and then I find it fun to go commando!
As for men, only boxers should be legal. briefs are all kinds of icky.

Posted by: diane at June 3, 2008 8:56 AM

I went 'boxer-briefs' a couple years ago and only keep the briefs around as backups. I tried true boxers but they're just to freedom-enabling.

The boxer-briefs, on the other hand, are oh-so-comfortable.

I should mention that they come in dark colors. Do I have to point out the benefits gained with that?

Posted by: whall at June 3, 2008 9:05 AM

I may look all professional and conservative on the outside, but I am often sporting a brightly colored/patterned thong under this business attire. One of my thongs is green with white reindeer. I have some plain solid colored ones to match every pair of pants I own, but for casual wear, I go with the striped and patterns and such. Every kind of underwear gives me a wedgie, so I go for as little fabric as possible in back. That was probably way more than you needed to know, wasn't it?

Posted by: MamaKaren at June 3, 2008 9:22 AM

Hey - brave man putting your underthangs out for the world to see!

Me, I'm a weirdo. Thong only during the day. Bikini to sleep in. For some reason, during the day I can overlook the fact that I have a wedgie, but at night it's UNBEARABLE!

My husband wears briefs and I *HATE THEM*. But, we've been together 11 years almost and I haven't been able to change it in all that time, so odds are good that I never will.

Posted by: sarah at June 3, 2008 9:52 AM

Definitely commando, though I don't do that (much) anymore.

I went an entire summer in college once without wearing any underwear, with a few exceptions for girl-stuff days. So, should we ever meet in person, and the weather is warm, and I am wearing a very long skirt....


Posted by: jessica at June 3, 2008 10:07 AM

I'm a thong girl myself. Girls who say they don't like thongs b/c they've spent their whole lives trying to get their underwear OUT of their butt are in severe denial. Bikinis & briefs stay up your butt too. Thongs just remove all the excess fabric so you don't have to keep digging it out.

(I wear them b/c of the no-panty line thing.)

My husband & son both wear boxers. (Although my teenager is kinda into the boxer-briefs these days.) I take responsibility for throwing out the old AND purchasing the new. A gril's gotta do it b/c men will wear the same drawers FOR. EVER.

Posted by: kalisa at June 3, 2008 10:13 AM

lol. hmmmm.
tay wears boxer briefs? i dunno. they're like boxers but fitted. but he has these really old one that are all ripped up and stuffage falls out of them. those are apparently his sexy ones.

i just wear underwear. i dunno. sometimes they are very bright coloured. now that im married i've been trying to find 'underclothing' that is more sexy? ish. but im just not sexy. i punch sexy in the face. so im just striving for prettyish. baby steps i guess.

i would think that wearing regular boxers would be
kinda lumpy under pants wouldnt it?
i like the dr. seuss ones.
when i was little i used to buy my dad looney tunes ones. also very bright. for fathers day. he would put them on over his pants and dance around playing his harmonica and wearing his blues brothers hat.

Posted by: Cri at June 3, 2008 10:15 AM

Love the title except now I am singing it in my head. Over.and.over.

Hubby is boxers or boxer-briefs. I throw out the undesirable ones and buy him new ones. He has some pretty humourous ones from Joe Boxer.

Me...french cut or none...cotton all the way baby!

Posted by: Amber at June 3, 2008 10:59 AM

I can understand your aversion to change. I'm a Jockey, string bikini, black, three pack kinda gal. I just recently broke out of my shell and purchased the exact same undies but in COLORS. Like, SPRING colors (thank you Ross for 12 bucks off). It's been over a week and I'm still washing the ratty, elastic exposed ones because, well. Color.

Posted by: rai at June 3, 2008 11:08 AM

I like bikini panties most of the time. I hate thongs but wear them when it's required because visible panty line is UNACCEPTABLE.

And bravo to you for being a boxer man. Boxers are far sexier than any other option for men.

Posted by: donna at June 3, 2008 11:08 AM

Figure 7 (Circa 1991-92) is my fave!

I prefer "boy shorts", but also have a myriad of underpants in the drawer. My oldest pair is probably only 1-2 years old though, unlike yours which is almost old enough to vote!

Funny underpants aside: It drives me NUTS if Mila or Summer wear Tuesday panties on, say, Saturday! Jason thinks I'm bat shit crazy.

Posted by: Mymilabean at June 3, 2008 11:51 AM

Boxer Briefs. No tighty-whiteys for me. But I don't like the free-ballin' of boxers either.


Posted by: Brad at June 3, 2008 11:57 AM

Always, always thongs. When I was in college I bought two pairs of scratch-and-sniff ones--one strawberry and one pineapple--and my roomates and I made tons of jokes about what their first...unveiling was going to be like. Only when it actually happened I was too embarrassed to mention that my underpants were scratch-and-sniff, so the room just gradually smelled like strawberries. The guy never said anything about it, so I don't know if he even noticed.

Posted by: samantha at June 3, 2008 12:28 PM

I actually fall in the middle. I like the boxer briefs. The best of both worlds!

Posted by: Jeff A at June 3, 2008 12:34 PM

I will wear almost anything, as long as it's not huuuge.

My favorite pair are from Victoria's Secret. They have bunnies on them, and they say "bunny" in French.

Unfortunately, I get drunk and show people this. So I don't wear them often.

This post does remind me that I need new underwear, however, and I'm in luck! It's semi-annual sale time at Victoria's! must... go... shopping...

Posted by: Cassandra at June 3, 2008 12:37 PM

Me - thongs, strictly thongs. My theory? Anything's going to be up the crack of my ass. I might as well make it the least amount of material possible. They are not uncomfortable and icky at all.
My husband - he's gone from briefs to boxers to boxer briefs but he's generally commando in the summer - or is it winter? I never know when or why for that matter.

Posted by: NancyB at June 3, 2008 12:39 PM

Eye opening, Chris. You can learn a lot about someone by rifling through his Delicates drawer. And today I learned that you are 12. But I think I knew that already. Also, that someone will make boxers out of bad chef pants, and someone else will buy them. :)

My husband, oh, he'll kill me for telling you this...he still has a pair of boxers that our gay friend screened on his lips in red lipstick to the butt check of. He still has his PRISON boxers (prison only lets you have a certain type and color) and the crotch is gone in them. Just a big hole. And he still has them.

My undie drawer? Empty. Too cheap to buy them. I just pretend I'm all cool and militantly commando.

Posted by: Mr Lady at June 3, 2008 1:01 PM

OMG! My husband has some boxers just like the top pair in picture 7! And-oddly enough--they're equally as ragged as those shown. Have you been pilfering in his...you know...drawers? And I'm talking about the furniture kind.

Posted by: apathy lounge at June 3, 2008 1:06 PM

No matter what, it's going to go up your butt. With that in mind I tend to opt for the least amount of material wedging itself between my cheeks. Thus, I'm a thong girl.

Posted by: SassyPants at June 3, 2008 2:04 PM

LMFAO....THAT was truly hilarious!!


Posted by: been there, done that at June 3, 2008 2:59 PM

Well, my undies are of the Walmart special ilk. They're called hipsters and they have all kinds of stupid phrases and pictures on them, but the FIT and they don't crawl UP, so I continue to buy them. My favorites have a crown on the front, complete with glitter, and then the Halloween ones that say wicked on them. I really liked them until I noticed the skull and crossbones on the butt.

Posted by: k8 at June 3, 2008 3:02 PM

Hubby is boxer-briefs. He likes them because they are "anti-chafe".

Why is it "UNACCEPTABLE" for panty lines to show, but totally ok for bra straps to show? I don't get it, and the bra strap thing drives me nuts. Also, muffin tops - if you can't pull off the hipster-cut jeans, don't wear them.

Posted by: Peggi at June 3, 2008 3:14 PM

Well it totally depends what I'm wearing. I prefer tong. Otherwise bikini briefs.

The Man where's the boxer brief.

Posted by: Nat at June 3, 2008 3:47 PM

on a man? BOXERS. definitely. or the boxer brief is good too...sometimes...depending on the man...

on me? i'm a v-string kinda girl. or a commando. depends.

Posted by: ali at June 3, 2008 4:36 PM

I feel privileged to have riffled through your underwear drawer.

In return: Bryan wears both boxers and briefs. I wear french cut panties. NO THONGS EVER. I hate dental floss in my teeth, so I *really* hate it in my ass.

Posted by: Aimee Greeblemonkey at June 3, 2008 5:39 PM

I am the anti-commando. I can not stand being bottomless. Nothing NOTHING creeps me out more then my lady parts rubbing on the seam of my pants and potentially leaving Cootchie Goobers behind.

That being said I am all about boy-shorts - I have recently purchased a stack of microfibre Jockey Boy-shorts that really are seamless. NO VPL and they don't crawl. Almost perfect. Thongs are for tight yoga pants days - or when I intend to get laid - or when I feel like rubbing my ass crack to the point of getting chafed.

There ya go- graphic but true.

Posted by: SleepyNita at June 3, 2008 6:05 PM

on him: boxer briefs. Because it's the best of both worlds...oh my yes.
And in black please. please please please.

on me: commando if in a skirt.
Thong or bootie shorts in pants.
no prints, just colors.

Posted by: the speckledpup at June 3, 2008 6:21 PM

on him: boxer briefs. Because it's the best of both worlds...oh my yes.
And in black please. please please please.

on me: commando if in a skirt.
Thong or bootie shorts in pants.
no prints, just colors.

Posted by: the speckledpup at June 3, 2008 6:21 PM

on him: boxer briefs. Because it's the best of both worlds...oh my yes.
And in black please. please please please.

on me: commando if in a skirt.
Thong or bootie shorts in pants.
no prints, just colors.

Posted by: the speckledpup at June 3, 2008 6:21 PM

Can I just say that "panties" is my least favourite word in the english language. It is just so ick that it makes my insides skirm and to write it has just given me a little twitch in my eye. It's just plain nasty.

Ok enough about that. I would say thongs. But we call them g-strings in Australia although I am not sure why (that is why we call them g-strings not why I where them).

I ramble alot in comments. Apologies.

Posted by: Beth at June 3, 2008 6:52 PM

Before I start I have to tell you that "panties" is my least favourite word in the entire english language. It is so ick that it makes my insides skirm and to write it has just made me get a little twitch in my left eye. It's just plain nasty.

Ok enough about that. I would say that it's thongs for me - although we call them g-strings in Australia. Not sure why though (that is why we call them that not why I wear them).

I seem to ramble in my comments. Apologies.

Posted by: Beth at June 3, 2008 6:54 PM

Weird but I love granny panties. I like the security of knowing if something happens and my shorts ride up or whatever, I'm still all covered up! Commando at night though. Can't sleep at all in underdraws!

My hub and younger son like boxers. Older son likes briefs.

Love the Seuss boxers!

Posted by: Willow at June 3, 2008 7:34 PM

I too, am the sneaky one that throws out the Mr's undesirable undies. He is a boxer-brief kinda guy. Tightie whities are right on up there with speedos (ugh!).

I am a cotton, french cut kinda gal. No butt floss for me thanks!

Posted by: Amber at June 3, 2008 8:32 PM

I like your chili pepper and Dr Seuss ones :-) I'm mostly thongs or sometimes boyshorts. Thongs are the comfiest once you're used to them! And it doesn't hurt to feel just a bit sexy either.
Oh, and I like boxers or boxer-briefs on men. Tighty whities are just wrong :P

Posted by: Heather at June 3, 2008 9:53 PM

Have you guys heard of 'no-undie Sunday', an official commando day every week, or is it just my family that is kind of bizarre?
On other days I am a boy-leg fan particularly if I am wearing hipsters, I don't cope well with visible strings (I am Aussie too, so thongs go on our feet and g-strings get lost!) Boxers are great for sleeping in, especially those that almost look like shorts so I can avoid getting dressed in the morning!

Posted by: del at June 3, 2008 10:30 PM

All good wives throw out the old boxers every time we do laundry. It's the only way...lol. And i'm a thong girl. i don't wear anything but. mostly victoria's secret.

Posted by: tiffanie at June 3, 2008 10:45 PM

Love the Seuss boxers!!!

Posted by: coolchick at June 4, 2008 6:34 AM

Commando. Unless I'm wearing a skirt.

Posted by: Gwen at June 4, 2008 10:44 AM

1. You have a lot of underwear.
2. I love your onefish, twofish boxers.

I prefer thongs and/or bikini style underwear, but love boxers on my man.

Posted by: Kimberly at June 4, 2008 2:40 PM

You know what I thought of? You, in your oh-so-practical work clothes, wearing Dr. Seuss boxers.

I always wear thongs and occasionally I'll go commando if they're all dirty and I don't feel like washing clothes. (But no, not if I'm wearing a skirt.)

Posted by: Zandria at June 13, 2008 7:32 PM

Houses are quite expensive and not every person is able to buy it. However, business loans was created to support different people in such kind of cases.

Posted by: POWERSTami at October 6, 2010 10:51 PM