March 13, 2009

The Weeklies #77

The Weekly Spooky Fact. Happy Friday the 13th!

The Weekly Picture and With Actual Mia-Quote Caption.

frame3620494.jpg

The Weekly Worst Cars Ever. Time Magazine has a great writeup on the 50 worst cars ever made. It's well written and hilarious. The best one-liner belongs to a description of the Yugo which, they stated, "had the distinct feeling of something assembled at gunpoint."

The Weekly Good Cause. I saw an ad last night about something I thought was really cool. The Inspiration Cafe. Basically, it's a restaurant for the homeless. Someone waits on them. They get to choose what they order. They get served on real plates. With real silverware. And they get support services in addition to a good meal. I worked in a homeless shelter for seven years. I cooked and served food. I got lots of smiles and thank yous. I understand how valuable a meal is not just to a stomach but to a soul. The Inspiration Cafe is an unbelievably fantastic idea. The parent organization - Inspiration Corporation - offers some ingenious solutions for the homeless. I know times are tight but if you're looking for a cool way to make a difference, here's a truly wonderful organization. And if you're in Chicago, give some time.

The Weekly Music. Am I going to get too many arguments if I claim that U2's Joshua Tree is one of the finest albums ever recorded? While the band has released some really good albums since, none have matched Joshua Tree's brilliance. The last two U2 albums, while containing some great material, have felt more like a collection of songs - some good, some not - than true albums. I had hoped that No Line On The Horizon would end that trend. It didn't. The album starts off incredibly promising. The first track - the title track - is like a modern, updated version of something that would have sounded at home on Joshua Tree. And the energy continues with Magnificent. I was jazzed, really digging it. Then Moment of Surrender started and, well, my interest surrendered. While it's not a bad song, it literally sucked all the energy out of the album and brought it to a screeching halt. And the album never really recovered for me though there were some really strong moments. Don't get me wrong, it's not bad. But it's not an album. It's yet another collection of not-bad U2 songs that, together, never live up to their potential.

The Weekly Read. I love finding a good, compelling book that completely sucks you in and doesn't let go until you turn the final page. A book that you reflect on during the day, wondering what's going to happen next, when you finally get your hands on it again. Tom Cain's Accident Man was just that kind of book. It's a Robert Ludlum-style cloak-and-dagger jaunt through Europe, filled with action and intrigue using a very tragic event in recent history (I'm not going to ruin it for you) as its jumping off point. When it ended, I was sorry it was over. So sorry that I immediately ordered the just-released sequel.

The Weekly Schadenfreude. Seriously, Rihanna and Chris Brown recorded a duet together earlier this week? Worse is the fact that Nickelodeon refused to axe the two nominations Brown got for the Kids' Choice Awards. Brown withdrew his own name from the competition. The big schadenfreude of the week, though, belongs to Bernard Madoff, he of the gigantic Ponzi scheme. Dude's going to jail...for a long long time.

The Weekly Hypothetical. You learn that you will be a more successful, happier human being if you change your gender. No painful operations or social consequences, just a snap of the fingers and you're set. So, do you do it? Or is the thought of belonging to the opposite sex and all that comes with it too much of a deterrent? What's the first thing you'd do as a member of the opposite sex?

Posted by Chris at March 13, 2009 6:34 AM
Comments

I was really disappointed in U2's last effort, so I might not even give the new one a shot. I heard that they are moving in a reggae direction now. What fresh hell?

And no way am I going to be a man. Society will have to accept that I am a badass female and deal with it!

Posted by: Stephanie at March 13, 2009 7:04 AM

Wow... looks like I'll be first if not in the top 10.

Ummm.... I don't know if I'd change. I'd certainly consider it. If only to pee standing up. (My issue here is what happens with The Man... you know... that would be weird.

Dunno.

Posted by: Nat at March 13, 2009 7:05 AM

Oh my goodness - Mia looks just like Beth in that picture! Too cute!

I think I'd pass on the gender change.

Posted by: Traci at March 13, 2009 7:26 AM

Let me get this straight. Somebody says, "so Marshall, you want to be successful? You'll need a vagina."

How is that different from "go fuck yourself?"

Posted by: Marshall at March 13, 2009 8:08 AM

the chick that began the inspiration cafe was featured on some news thing I watch recently..her and her red wagon!!

Did you hear about one of the comedians roasting Larry the Cable Guy?? Went into skit about his "Git er done" line...said he's beaten that so badly its dating Chris Brown....yea, she's getting slack for saying it...people are too sensitive.

Posted by: Darren at March 13, 2009 8:37 AM

"Tacophone"? LOVE IT. :)

That Time article was hilarious.

Posted by: Shannon at March 13, 2009 8:50 AM

I don't know why I'm surprised your kid's so funny. She comes from good, hilarious stock.

If I weren't in a relationship, and I knew I'd be happier, I probably wouldn't hesitate to change my gender.

About Madoff, is he going to Club Med Rich Guy prison, or federal pound-me-in-the-ass-prison? It makes a difference.

Posted by: Fraulein N at March 13, 2009 9:18 AM

I have never been a U2 fan, they have some okay songs but for the most part I find them Meh!

I love the tacophone!!

You know what's even scarier, Boston surveyed Boston teens and almost half thought it was Rhianna's fault. WTF???

Posted by: Deirdre at March 13, 2009 9:30 AM

I'd swap to being a man in a hot minute if my husband was ok with it (or if he had to swap to a woman too) and if it wouldn't freak out my kids too bad. I'm not really that into women but I have some penis envy. I would miss my boobs though.

Posted by: Cassandra at March 13, 2009 9:38 AM

No argument here, Joshua Tree was (is) AWESOME. Was also my first U2 concert (the tour for Joshua Tree) and is my #1 concert of all time. I liked the 2 albums. Not near as much as JT, but I liked them. As long as the new one is better than POP, I'm happy! Besides, they are U2. My all time fav band.

No offense, but I don't wanna be a man. I like being a woman who loves men! If that makes me a failure, so be it!

Happy Weekend!

Posted by: cyndy at March 13, 2009 10:28 AM

Absolutely I'd switch genders, but only if I could warn my loved ones first about what was going down.

First thing I would do? Write my name in the snow.

Posted by: Amy at March 13, 2009 10:28 AM

Inspiration Cafe rules. Good work featuring them.

And yeah, if it was painless and I knew it would make me happier, I'd switch gender. First thing I'd do is try to master that "peeing upright" thing so I could go out in public without fearing the restroom.

Posted by: pseudostoops at March 13, 2009 11:05 AM

I really enjoy being a man. And I'm really happy, so I'm gonna say no. I think it'd be cool to be a woman, but the one thing holding me back is the wardrobe. No thanks.

Fun fact: Helen Hunt directed the commercials for the Inspiration Cafe.

Posted by: Brad at March 13, 2009 11:20 AM

I saw a segment on one of the news programs we watch about the Inspiration Cafe and I think it is one of the most awesome things I have seen in a while.

I would changes genders. While I am VERY happy with being a girl, I dont think it would hurt to be more happy as well as successful!!The first thing I would do is drive a motorcycle. (I have always wanted to and my boyfriend has tried to teach me on his but I am too scared and he just seems to think it is easy. I think it is a guy thing.)

Posted by: Kelly M. at March 13, 2009 11:20 AM

pee standing up. in front of a tree.

Posted by: RD at March 13, 2009 12:33 PM

Mia is too cute!!! Don't suppose you want to trade her for an almost 14 year old, surly, sarcastic, know-it-all male teen?
I know it's tempting enough already, but I will also throw in the fact that he's on 2 basketball teams which means you would also have the privelege of sitting on hard, uncomfortable gymnasium benches several times a week for games and practices. I know, it's a dream come true! ;)

Posted by: LaineyDid at March 13, 2009 12:43 PM

The tacophone is hilarious. If they do a Juno II that's what I would expect to see replace the hamburger phone.

I would pee my name in the snow. I've tried on camping trips and..how do I put this...it currently requires too much cleanup.

Posted by: Lizzle at March 13, 2009 2:24 PM

Do I have to have a penis? Because I don't like dangly stuff.

Posted by: k8 at March 13, 2009 2:50 PM

Heh. "A rate of acceleration you could measure with a calendar." Nice.
The Rhianna/Brown thing makes me really sad. But the tacophone makes me happy again ;)

Posted by: Heather at March 13, 2009 2:52 PM

I like War better than Joshua Tree - though I LURVE Joshua Tree. And actually, I LOVE All That You Can't Leave Behind. How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb, on the other hand, has 2 songs on it that are "good." I No Line on The Horizon with great hope. I didn't love it on the first listen. I liked it a little more on the second listen. I read they lyrics. I listened to it 3 more times (I went on a road trip the weekend I got it - by myself - so I wasn't tortuting anyone) and the fact is - I don't love it. I barely like it. I'm sad. I'm disappointed. Sigh.

What about emotional consequences for my children? Because I fully believe that children NEED a mama. While there are many things that I think would be awesome about being a man - especially peeing standing up and not having to put up with sore boobs and a nasty period - I can't imagine not still longing to be a soft, feminine, curvy, nurturing, woman. I like being a woman.

Posted by: Mindy at March 13, 2009 3:11 PM

I remember like it was yesterday:
Sitting in the parking lot before work, my best friend had waited in line to get Joshua Tree, and the strains of With or Without You came on. It was awesome. Everything after, not so much for me.

Posted by: jane at March 13, 2009 3:20 PM

Wurdle?! You evil, evil, evil man -- like I needed something to take up more of my time on my iphone? So I have one for you yikyak its a personal radio station kinda thing, but the cool part is you can have a Mia & Owen Radio station, where you can use your iphone to record them, commenting,singing, whatever and then play it back - we have ours set as a personal channel, so only the people we send it to can listen... and then another channel of kid distraction music that works ridiculously well. Or if you'd rather not have them discover more things to play with on the iphone, there's a regular web version to at www.yiqyaq.com but its not as much fun to record on the big computer.

Posted by: Celeste at March 13, 2009 3:29 PM

Seems I can't spell.
It's yiqyaq if you want to find it in the app store or www.yiqyaq.com
If my monkeys (3&5) would just sleep all night I might be able to remember how to do things like spell

Posted by: Celeste at March 13, 2009 3:32 PM

LOVE the Taco Phone!!!

When my daughter was about Mia's age, she misundertood when someone jokingly said they were going to give her a knuckle sandwich. For MONTHS after that, she would walk up to us, make a fist, and say, "Ima gonna give you a taco sammich!"

That is what Mia's phone reminded me of! :)

Posted by: Kris H at March 13, 2009 3:43 PM

I'm not sure I'd switch to being male, but if I did, the very first thing I'd do would be to pee standing up... outside. And then? Toss my "feminine products" -- every last one.

But once I did that, I'd probably be over it all. So I think I'll stay female. Thanks.

LOVE Mia and the Tacophone. Does it automatically change the voices to ones with Mexican/Spanish accents? LOL

Posted by: ironic1 at March 13, 2009 5:49 PM

Awww, my first car was a Yugo (a 45A, if you want to know) called, in a piece of inspired nomenclature, Hugo. He was awful and we loved him. All the body panels vibrated at the same frequency so the moment you hit 55mph (a rare occurrence) the whole car tried to simultaneously shake itself to bits. Oh, and the gear stick used to come off if you tried to change gear too quickly. And the whole of the interior, right down to the indicator stalks was covered in Eastern European beige sticky-backed plastic. Classy. I miss him.

Posted by: Loth at March 13, 2009 6:27 PM

Well, you've set up the hypothetical such that a Vulcan could not logically turn it down. All the problems that I would associate with switching genders, you've erased. So I'd say "sure!"

I *would* add that I'd take the last five minutes before the Big Change to play with my breasts with the hopes that I'd remember what it was like. I've heard (repeatedly. oh my GAWD repeatedly) that that's what men would do if they had breasts. I'm right there with ironic1 - the tossing of the fem-prods is a BIG bonus!

On the other hand (heh heh), I really like men. Certainly, one in particular. Would we have to be gay? Or does he swap too?

Posted by: harmzie at March 13, 2009 6:51 PM

Hubby and I are huge U2 fans. But, we both didn't care for their latest. I only somewhat liked two of the songs.

Wouldn't change sex. I can't even imagine being a guy and guys can't multi-task, I could not handle that.

I think that Cafe was on the news. I saw something on it a few weeks back (I think).

Great shot of Mia.

Posted by: One Mom's Opinion at March 13, 2009 9:01 PM

You have just the most beautiful children. Seriously.

Posted by: patricia at March 13, 2009 10:57 PM

I love the Tacophone. That's awesome.

As a man, I'd pee standing up. I always wanted too as a kid. That's be the first thing I'd do. But really I like being a woman.

Posted by: Issa at March 14, 2009 12:50 AM

Love the 'tacophone'!!! Too cute!

Ummmm.... no weekly time waster this week? I've been waiting to waste time all week, and no time waster!!! Waaaaa!

Posted by: coolchick at March 14, 2009 12:57 PM

That picture and quote is adorable. The good cause thing sounds great. I've never heard of anyone doing something like that.

Posted by: Zandor at March 14, 2009 1:15 PM

Here's what I've discovered about U2: I love them, but I have to work at it. I totally did not appreciate The Joshua Tree album when it came out. Granted, I was only about 12, but still. Now, I think it's amazing and one of the best albums ever; it was so completely different than anything else that was out at the time.

When How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb was released and a friend of ours stated that he thought it was even better than The Joshua Tree, I thought he'd gone a little soft in the head and was sad for him. I listened to it. It was ok. Now, I love it. In fact, I have a CD that is made up of HTDAAB followed by the first few songs off of JT. I have to say, JT feels flat after listening to HTDAAB. Don't get me wrong, I still think it's a great album, but I'm just not interested in listening to it after HTDAAB. Right now I'm also on the meh wagon with No Line on the Horizon, but I'm hoping that it will grow on me with time.

Yeah, I might take the bait and switch over to being a man. My first act: Apologize to my husband.

Posted by: Dreamybee at March 15, 2009 10:47 AM

Here's what I've discovered about U2: I love them, but I have to work at it. I totally did not appreciate The Joshua Tree album when it came out. Granted, I was only about 12, but still. Now, I think it's amazing and one of the best albums ever; it was so completely different than anything else that was out at the time.

When How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb was released and a friend of ours stated that he thought it was even better than The Joshua Tree, I thought he'd gone a little soft in the head and was sad for him. I listened to it. It was ok. Now, I love it. In fact, I have a CD that is made up of HTDAAB followed by the first few songs off of JT. I have to say, JT feels flat after listening to HTDAAB. Don't get me wrong, I still think it's a great album, but I'm just not interested in listening to it after HTDAAB. Right now I'm also on the meh wagon with No Line on the Horizon, but I'm hoping that it will grow on me with time.

Yeah, I might take the bait and switch over to being a man. My first act: Apologize to my husband.

Posted by: Dreamybee at March 15, 2009 10:49 AM

Good lordy, I missed you.

*ahem*
Joshua Tree, yesyesyes.

First thing I'd do as a man? Some chick.

Posted by: Mr Lady at March 15, 2009 8:22 PM

Good lordy, I missed you.

*ahem*
Joshua Tree, yesyesyes.

First thing I'd do as a man? Some chick.

Posted by: Mr Lady at March 15, 2009 8:22 PM

Ok as much as I love being a woman...the absolute first thing I'd do as a man is have sex with a woman ;-)

Posted by: Gabriella at March 16, 2009 12:05 AM

I would not want to lose my friendships and relationships as they are now- espec w/ John- to become the other gender. But if I did, I would want to go jerk off. I have just always wondered what that feels like. I wonder too what it is like to be with a woman.


It is great to have a book so good that all day you look forward to getting back into the story.
I like it too when a book sucks me in so that in my every day life I start to feel a little like I am living in that setting- a book so good it changes my perceptions for the duration of the read.

Posted by: Karen at March 16, 2009 9:59 PM

Did GET SMART have a tacophone? They should have had a tacophone.

Posted by: Gramps at March 17, 2009 11:06 AM


DEC08_RECENT.jpg


DEC08_ARCHIVE.jpg