June 12, 2009

The Weeklies #89

The Weekly Beer. Dominion Pale Ale

The Weekly Time Waster #1. Check out Empire's Cryptic Canvas.

The Weekly Time Waster #2. CiviBalls!

The Weekly Read. Michael Marshall's Bad Things is an intensely creepy, extremely well-written novel. I almost couldn't put it down and became fairly emotionally entangled in the story and the people in it. That said, I was expecting an end, an explanation that would justify the creepy mystery. And it just wasn't there. The means justified the end. It's most definitely worth picking up.

The Weekly Music. Todd Snider is like a hip, countrified Randy Newman. His songwriting is wonderfully smart and his sense of humor is fantastic. Despite the fact that I don't own all his stuff, I was pretty excited when I heard that his latest - The Excitement Plan - had hit the street. Lyrically, it's smart and clever as all things Snider are. The thing is, despite having a world class producer and some great sidemen along for the ride, the production and the mix just don't sound all that great. Okay, not great. That shouldn't deter you though. Snider's wit is fully intact and more than overcomes any issues with production.

The Weekly Schadenfreude #1. What do you do when you realize you're stupid? You file a lawsuit because being dumb can't be your fault, right? That's what a certain ignorant idiot did when she realized that not all was what it seemed. Especially Cap'n Crunch's Crunch Berries cereal. "The plaintiff, Janine Sugawara, alleged that she had only recently learned to her dismay that said 'berries' were in fact simply brightly-colored cereal balls."

The Weekly Schadenfreude #2. The world's financial situation is pretty dire but you shouldn't start hording money in your mattress. That's what one Tel Aviv resident learned. See, her daughter gave her a new mattress and pitched the old one. But that old mattress? Contained about $1 million that she'd stashed away.

The Weekly Hypothetical. You can eliminate one law. Which one would you do away with and why?

Posted by Chris at June 12, 2009 6:52 AM

I am just about to start Bad Things. I'm glad to see such a good review!

As for laws, I think I'm ready to get rid of highway speed limits. Hey, it works out west, right?

Posted by: Jaime at June 12, 2009 7:55 AM

One law? My head dreams up new ones, so I can't answer that...and based on the responses a few years back when I discussed laws related to guns and gun ownership, I think I'll pass.

But I will pick up that book. I'm dying for a good read.

Posted by: Theresa at June 12, 2009 9:41 AM

Crunch Berries aren't actually berries? Great! What's next? You going to ruin my day and tell me that Grape Nuts aren't actually nuts?

As for laws, here in MN I'd love to see some of the Sunday "blue laws" go away, especially requiring liquor stores to be closed on Sunday. I'm not a habitual boozer, but sometimes I'd like to get a bottle of wine for Sunday dinner, and I don't always remember to get it on Saturday.

Posted by: J at June 12, 2009 9:44 AM

I thought grapenuts were grapes!
One law....hmmmm.....the law that makes it illegal to shoot ones ex-husband! LOL! Not really. My friends and family will tell you that I am a good kid who plays by the rules.

Posted by: Maribeth at June 12, 2009 10:11 AM

Anyone who thinks that Capn Crunch Berries are real berries is too stupid to live. Have you never seen a plant, woman?

As for what law I'd get rid of, well, it's probably many laws, but I'd legalize drugs. It seems to me that would solve any number of problems in this country -- from generating revenue for the government, to cutting down on prison overcrowding, to freeing up police to focus on other crimes, to curbing drug related violence. Of course, I've just watched the 1st three seasons of The Wire, which may be influencing me a little bit.

Posted by: bad penguin at June 12, 2009 10:12 AM

Darn it! I am smack in the middle of Bad Things right now and LOVING it. I hope I won't be disappointed. He also writes under the name Michael Marshall Smith and has some good books under that name.

Posted by: Lesley at June 12, 2009 10:42 AM

So I got thinking about your law to get rid of question....
As much as I think it's a good law, the seat belt law is the one I came up with. Think of it as a way to get rid of the stupid people. If they're dumb enough to drive without a seat belt, get into a car accident and die - that's one less stupid person on the planet.... Now I think they should put an age limit on it of course, all kids under 16 should be required to wear one. After that - if you're old enough to drive, you're old enough to know to wear your seat belt....

Posted by: Rose Winters at June 12, 2009 11:01 AM

*ahem* You forgot to tell everyone that one of your readers used to date Todd Snider.

Posted by: kalisa at June 12, 2009 11:04 AM

duh. the law (or whatever) that states that gay people can't get legally married in every single state in this nation. what year do we LIVE in?! ::sigh::

Posted by: RzDrms at June 12, 2009 11:14 AM

I would get rid of the 24 hour waiting period/parental consent laws that restrict access to abortion by making them more difficult to get. Usually, I'm a big fan of law and order in general, but these seem nuts to me.

Posted by: rebecca at June 12, 2009 11:43 AM

Hmmm...three that I can think of:

1) That same-sex marriage is not legal in all states.

2) The seat belt law...if motorcyclists don't have to wear helmets (in many states) why do pople in cars have to wear seat belts? I agree with the other poster who said it would get rid of the stupid people...and they'd be less likely to reproduce.

3) And, I think this one only applies to Pennsylvania...that you can only by alcohol from liquor stores or beer distributors yet I can drive 30 minutes and buy beer or wine at the grocery store.

Posted by: Krush at June 12, 2009 12:07 PM

I am also one who isn't fond of the seatbelt law, I see it as a personal freedom now obviously children should be belted in but as an adult I should be able to make the decision of whether or not I want to wear it and if I die in a crash because my body was hurled out the window well so be it, my own fault.

Stupid people are everywhere, I'm still waiting for someone to reveal the person who sued the hairdryer companies that prompted them to put on the warning label "Do not use while sleeping"

Posted by: Dee at June 12, 2009 12:20 PM

I'm sure I can think of a better law later, but for now I'd erase the right to bear arms. I would like to see the world without guns.

Now, what was the thing in the toilet?

Posted by: Brad at June 12, 2009 1:27 PM

I'd really like same sex marriage to be legal in all states. That it's not is insanely stupid to me.

Beyond that, I'm kind of a rule girl and don't have a problem with TOO many laws, and don't want to think too hard to come up with some. I know there's others i disagree wth but am too tired to think about it.

Posted by: sarah at June 12, 2009 2:43 PM

For pure civil rights reasons, I'd eliminate laws banning gay marriage.

For widespread impact on a bunch of key issues and problems, I'd decriminalize drug use. Ineffective at addressing the issue of drug abuse, hugely disparate enforcement along racial lines, costs a fortune in law enforcement, court, and incarceration costs, misses a great opportunity for some tax revenue- current laws are misguided on many levels, I'd say.

Posted by: pseudostoops at June 12, 2009 3:15 PM

Gravity. So I could fly, of course.

Posted by: Angella at June 12, 2009 5:11 PM

What's up with all the nokia links? Have you been invaded?

Posted by: cass at June 12, 2009 11:20 PM

Laws I would change? It's a toss up between legalizing gay marriage and adoption - seriously, why are we making gays/lesbians second class citizens based on the genitalia of who they love? - and legalizing marijuana (far less harmful than alcohol in my opinion) which won't happen until phizer and bristol meyers squibb figure out how they can make 2000% profits by putting their name on it.

Posted by: Jen at June 13, 2009 4:15 AM

The law of attraction. Because Pisces men drive me fucking bat shit crazy, but damn if I can't resist them.

Water to water, my ass.

Posted by: Mr Lady at June 14, 2009 2:56 AM

I would make pot legal becuase it is not bad. No one does bad things while 'on pot.' Pot makes you lazy. I think we could all use a bit of that. Plus it would free up the jails for those who are really harming others.

Posted by: Ashley K at June 16, 2009 8:15 AM

I would make pot legal becuase it is not bad. No one does bad things while 'on pot.' Pot makes you lazy. I think we could all use a bit of that. Plus it would free up the jails for those who are really harming others.

Posted by: Ashley K at June 16, 2009 8:15 AM