November 30, 2009

The Wii, Again (Or, Wiivisited)

Okay, I have something to admit. When I was in high school, I was in a bowling league. You can stop pointing at your screen and laughing. It's true. Every Saturday morning, five of us - my team which I'm sure had a name reflective of our fascination with hair metal - would converge on the local lanes way earlier than you'd expect high school students to do much of anything and we'd play in a surprisingly large league of like-minded ruffians. Afterward, we'd head to the closest McDonald's, smoke, talk about aforementioned hair metal and bitch/gloat about the pathetic/excellent games we'd just played.

[For future reference or to get a better picture of who these people were, I give you my team. Todd, the most type-a personality on the team who probably went on to be a doctor or nuclear physicist. Todd was fascinated with the band Faster Pussycat and had a hot sister. Brad was most likely to become an actual professional bowler what with a couple of perfect 300 games under his belt by the age of 17. Vince, on the other hand, was most likely to become a used car salesman though, at the time, he was arguably the most fun to hang around with. Sean loved stale cigarettes to the point at which he'd get fishing line and a needle and string cigarettes up overnight in his room to get them stale faster. Of the five of us, Sean is most likely to be dead.]

Despite my part-time bowling career and the imagery of geekdom it brings, I still managed to be reasonably popular and get laid in high school.

This is a long way of saying that I think, even twenty years later, I'm a halfway decent bowler well qualified to take on a video-game version and be moderately successful. That is, until my daughter got her hands on the game.

Mia kicked my Wii ass all over the virtual bowling alley this weekend. She went from gutter balls to five strikes in a row in, oh, about twenty minutes. And kept on getting better. And it wasn't like the rest of us were putting up pathetic scores. No, Mia's top score is around 217 and she keeps putting up strong numbers.

Why is this? Why are kids able to master this stuff so fast? I'm beginning to think that all those sci-fi world domination plots based on training kids to fly tiny remote fighter planes armed with nukes isn't so unreal. I mean, okay, the kids would get bored somewhere over the ocean, wander off to find fruit roll-ups and the whole world domination plot would come crashing down in a rain of high-fructose corn syrup but still, it's not out of the realm of possibility. Kids can pick up anything, master most everything, and if they have the right amount of patience, can kick our asses in anything other than hand-to-hand combat. Which, honestly, they'd win there too because who's going to kick-box a kid?

Has a kid ever kicked your ass? Why do you think they can? And do you think we'd stand a chance if they decided to revolt?

And finally, a question posed by Mia last night - does sorry have chocolate ice cream on it?

There - bowling, high school memories, sex and existentialism all in one handy Monday morning post. What more could you want?

(Whatever it is, I don't have it. It's Monday after all.)

Posted by Chris at November 30, 2009 6:40 AM

Yes Mia...sorry does have chocolate ice cream on it. Definitely!

Posted by: daisy at November 30, 2009 8:22 AM

Ugh and eye-rolling and a chuckle (to your title)! Elliot routinely beats me at all things Wii, so I feel your pain.

Posted by: Elizabeth at November 30, 2009 8:44 AM

When Amanda was 5 I'd taught her to play backgammon. We went to a party and brought the kids and an MIT grad wanted to show off by playing the 5 year old and kicking her butt. Well, Amanda played the game of her life and kicked his ass!!!
I was so proud.
The MIT grad never quite recovered.

Posted by: Maribeth at November 30, 2009 8:52 AM

Dude, it's almost 2010. You can't post about your high school bowling team and just theorize about what happened to the others. Get ye ass on Facebook and LinkedIn and get the truth. Your readers can handle the truth :)

Seriously, whatever happened to the great American bowling team would be one hell of a post.

BTW, not only was I also on a team, we won the league. I was also on a bowling team in college, although that group usually measured it's score in pitchers, not pins.

Posted by: COD at November 30, 2009 9:56 AM

I bowled a 300 when I was stationed in Germany. A bowling league with friends to gab and drink beer.

Video games come easy for most kids and if we let them, they will happily play all day. I haven't beat my son at video games since the Gamecube. Beating his parents at something makes him happy and doesn't bother me at all.

Posted by: One Mom's Opinion at November 30, 2009 11:23 AM

I have young nieces (many) who e-mail me cell phone photos of the TV screen whenever they Wii bowl in the 290's and so far, two 300 games. My highest Wii bowling score is 222. Damn kids.

Posted by: pinetree22 at November 30, 2009 12:13 PM

I have young nieces (many) who e-mail me cell phone photos of the TV screen whenever they Wii bowl in the 290's and so far, two 300 games. My highest Wii bowling score is 222. Damn kids.

Posted by: pinetree22 at November 30, 2009 12:14 PM

My 8 year old daughter kicks my ass in just about ever Wii game we own. Especially bowling! So, I took her to a real bowling alley and wiped the floor with her. Am I proud? Mature? No. But I won, dammit!

Posted by: Meg at November 30, 2009 12:25 PM

My kids don't kick my ass at anything. I also would have kicked my husband's ass at Trivial Pursuit this weekend, but he got so many easy questions (What city are the Steelers from? Really?) and he beat me in a dead heat to the center space.

Sorry doesn't have chocolate on it. It's cold and broken like Leonard Cohen's hallelujahs.

Posted by: Brooke at November 30, 2009 12:44 PM

I don't think my kids have beat me at bowling yet, but I'm sure we'll have some knock down fights there in the future. My oldest got to the point that she was beating me on Mario Kart (highly recommeded) when I would let her have a lead. I had to stop doing that. We consistently finish 1-2.

Posted by: Rex Spell at November 30, 2009 4:36 PM

Faster Pussycat...hehe. one of my good friends was (and still kind of is) a huge FP fan. i cant count how many shows ive gone to with her. meeting taime was a highlight.....(note the sarcasm)

Posted by: madmom at November 30, 2009 9:29 PM

haha I was in a bowling league when I was 10 or so, too. But I'm awful :P

Posted by: Heather at November 30, 2009 10:10 PM

Mia, "Sorry" has warm apple pie on top, and it may have chocolate, but not chocolate ice cream. Ice cream is cold, and sorry should always be warm enough for a hug to make up for the reason there's a sorry in the first place.

Posted by: alektra at December 1, 2009 1:08 AM

The bowling game is the best

Posted by: Surfer Jay at December 1, 2009 2:37 AM

The bowling game is the best

Posted by: Surfer Jay at December 1, 2009 2:37 AM

When my husband plays against our boys at anything Wii or Xbox, it usually ends with him calling them cheaters because they're so much better than him. Why does loosing to your kid make you that much more sore.

Posted by: Nila at December 1, 2009 3:55 AM

my 8 year old is starting to legitimately beat me when we run/race....that is humbling.

Posted by: meanie at December 1, 2009 7:49 AM

No fear? I don't know I know that's why kids master computers so fast, adults are so afraid of deleting things that are important that its hard for them to learn new things such as computers whereas kids just get on and tool around with no cares in the world.

Maybe you are too precise and she's just there to have a blast and doesn't care if she wildly throws a random ball onto another lane. HA!

Posted by: Dee at December 1, 2009 10:01 AM