January 4, 2010

The Post Holiday Blues

I'm back at work. It blows donkey cocks (and if that isn't some good Monday morning imagery, I don't know what is). I've basically been off since December 22nd so this morning's alarm came as an incredibly rude awakening. I'm doing my best, therefore, to relive that last couple of weeks in the hope that it shields me from reality for just a little bit longer. Come on and join me, why dontcha.

Toys assembled: 5 (1 dollhouse, 1 princess bike, 1 toddler car, 1 train table, 1 Little People garage)
Gifts wrapped: 28
Christmas trees setup: 1
Christmas trees taken down: 1
Christmas tunes listened played: 350
Bottles of champagne drunk: 0.5
Beers consumed: 32


Sugar plums that danced in my head: 0
Partridges in a pear tree: 0
Lords a leaping: 0
Cookies decorated: 3 dozen
Parties hosted: 1
Muppet Show episodes watched: 9

New words accidentally taught to Owen: 1 (fuck, if you're curious)
Times cursed the words some assembly required: 5

Drag shows featuring Owen as The Little Mermaid: 1
Performances of Oklahoma: 15
Performances of Oklahoma starring cross-dressing Owen: 1

New Year's resolutions made: 4
New Year's resolutions broken: 1
Miles ran: 3 (hey, it's a start, right?)
Books read: 2
Cars rear-ended: 1
Pictures taken: About 8448 (I've posted a bunch here)
Museums visited: 3
Museums Mia was interested in: 1
Dolphin shows watched: 1
Times I dreaded returning to work: 5,302

And what did you do?

Posted by Chris at January 4, 2010 6:35 AM

times left the house - 4
cookies baked - 7 dozen plus
money spent on wrapping cookies - $40
money spent on shipping cookies - $100
presents wrapped - 7
presents unwrapped - 1
card games played - 1
movies watched - 4 (Transformers 1 & 2, Serenity, The Hangover, Avatar)
TV shows caught up on - 2
Blog posts posted - 8
Blog posts in reserve - 4

My 19-year old brother is coming to visit from Australia. We have a day for some DC sight-seeing. He is your typical 19-yo guy.
As a man, a local, and a museum-goer, do you have any recommendations?
(assuming it will be too cold to walk the Monuments)

Posted by: Lisa at January 4, 2010 7:59 AM

I howled with laughter at some of these statistics (Drag shows featuring Owen as The Little Mermaid and Performances of Oklahoma starring cross-dressing Owen were my favorites).

My holiday was full of family and plans and presents and go-go-go and "Is it over yet?" and "Man, I love my life" and actually meaning it all with my whole heart.

Posted by: Emily at January 4, 2010 8:24 AM

Cookies baked: 20 dozen (no shit)
Peanut Butter Buckeyes made: 600 hundred
Enjoying my kids delight in Christmas: Uncountable
Having my oldest home for the first time in 3 years for Christmas: uncountable
Lost job: 1
Dog Passing: 1
Depression at the amount of unemployment I receive: Massive

Despite loosing my job, and my dog (feel like I'm coming right of a country song) I had a good holiday. I'm glad you and yours did as well.

Now back to monster to find the ever elusive online community manager position.

Posted by: Angelia at January 4, 2010 8:59 AM

I didn't keep track, but we did have a very nice holiday - and are glad it's over. The going back to work thing isn't nice, but as they way these days "at least I have a job". Sad state of events.

I have several friends who worked at the same Pharm company as I did who are no longer employed. And some of them are very specialized - hard to get another good job.

Posted by: cassie-b at January 4, 2010 9:35 AM

Your son does make one sweet little mermaid!

Posted by: Hope at January 4, 2010 9:54 AM

Nice... My dad always had a leatherman in his bathrobe pocket on Christmas morning. I now know why. Because the toys must work RIGHT NOW!

And I loved, loved, loved playing dress up with my brother. Sigh. Those were the days.

Posted by: k8 at January 4, 2010 9:54 AM

Parties hosted: 3
Parties attended (besides my own): 1
Donations to charity: 2
Pounds of pimento cheese consumed: 3
Bottles of wine drunk: Um....
Dinners cooked in my new crockpot: 3
Total pounds gained: Um....
Times I went to the gym: 2 (I think)
Movies I saw in the theater: 0
Movies I watched on my sofa: 7
Trips to Wal-Mart: Too many
Blogs wrapped up: 1
New blogs launched: 1
Emails exchanged between me and your hot, talented, oh-so-smart wife: 182

Happy Holidays and welcome back!

Posted by: rougeneck at January 4, 2010 11:07 AM

I'm wondering which resolution you broke already.

Posted by: Hazel at January 4, 2010 11:55 AM

Retinas Detached: 1
Retinas Reattached: 1
Days Spent Lying on my right side: 12
Cookies and cakes and sweets eaten: far too many
weight gained: 8 pounds
Gifts wrapped: 0 (I left them all in their bags. Thanks UPS and Fed-Ex)
Eggnog Drunk: 2
Hours slept: Far too many. I missed Christmas.
Really, I missed Christmas. So thank you for putting up these precious pictures of Mia and Owen. It's cheering me up!

Posted by: Maribeth at January 4, 2010 12:11 PM

It's not the holidays unless you've had some assembly required, some champagne, and some accidental swear word learning. I actually had a 2 year old that enjoyed stripping down to her diaper at various family functions this holiday season. THAT was festive!

Happy New Year to you and your family!

Posted by: Kim at January 4, 2010 2:47 PM

First time cooking dinner for entire clan--1
Hours husband was MIA Christmas Eve--15
Phone calls recieved during that time--0
Aunt passing--1
Tears shed--12,987
Joy on Kids faces from Santa--Priceless
Happy Children--2
Blog Launched--1
Insight or Epiphanys had--3
Children who received x-rays--1
Daughter (11) with UTI--1

I really loved the pictures of the celebration. I love Owen in drag, reminds me of my two at that age. So glad you just roll with his dressing up and don't get your macho panties in a wad. :)

Sorry you had to go back to work.

Posted by: debb at January 4, 2010 2:51 PM

We didn't have ANY toys to assemble! His daughter is going to be 9 this week. Though strike that, we got her Rock Band so does that count as "toy" because it had to be assembled.
For the record I LOVED The Muppet's growing up. Where did you find Muppet's episodes?
I want to know the story about you teaching Owen his first true F word. What were you doing? (my guess is assembling a toy) I think you should write a whole blog about it! LOL!
Your kids are adorable Chris!
For Christmas we had my parents, my brother & his son, and Michael's daughter here. Kinda small crowd as far as holidays go, but it was nice. My friend Shawn joined us for dinner too. That reminds me, being vegetarian, what did you have for Christmas dinner as a main course? I've been playing with my new phone for a few days so my mind is foggy.... I want to try to figure out how to get you in my RSS feed on there....

Posted by: Rose Winters at January 4, 2010 6:17 PM

Well, I worked on December 21 and 22. I flew to South Carolina on December 23. I spent Christmas Eve and Day with my family. My parents and I drove back to Florida on the 26th. We all hung out on the 27th. I went to work on the 28th. My parents went home on the 29th. I worked on the 30th and the 31st until 12:00. I came home and barely stayed awake for the beginning of 2010. I slept a BUNCH on January 1, went shopping on January 2, sat on my ass on January 3, and here I sit on January 4 after working. First full work week in 3 weeks. Dammit.

Posted by: Stephanie at January 4, 2010 7:41 PM

Looks like a wonderful, family-filled time! :)

Posted by: Heather at January 4, 2010 8:35 PM

Uh. . . cars rear-ended?

Posted by: lumpyheadsmom at January 5, 2010 2:26 PM

Yeah, our son is 2-1/2 and he finally forgot about what he had been calling our cat (and subsequently any toy that didn't work the way he wanted it to) "fucking damn cat." I'm proud that he uses the words appropriately ("fucking damn car," "fucking damn little people," "fucking damn...") but not so proud about what the words are. Unfortunately, I can't blame that one on my husband! I guess I'll try to be happier about the cat that's always underfoot.

Posted by: Tara at January 6, 2010 11:29 PM