March 10, 2011

Double Vision

Sometimes I wish I had a pair of special glasses. They'd be special because when you put them on they'd show you a vision of whatever you're gazing at at any time in history.

There's this shopping center that I grew up near and, oddly enough, I now live close to. I'd stand across the street, put the glasses on, turn them to 1989 and stare. Towards the video store that shoved gigantic VHS tapes inside even bigger red padded boxes as if the tapes were made of gold. At the grocery store so small that it seemed like an exaggerated 7-11 and the actual 7-11 that seemed just right. At the theaters that we hung out in, the floors of which were covered by years of spilled Coke. And at the Waxie Maxie's record store where friends worked and where we discovered that a CD thrown to the ground at exactly the right angle will shatter like glass instantaneously.

And while I'm talking about vision, I think you should know that I have x-ray vision. Or, more specifically, the video monitor we have in Owen's room has x-ray vision.

Last night Owen woke up grumpy. Beth went into his room and I watched everything unfold from the monitor. When she got done and came back downstairs:

Me: You have on your stripey underwear don't you?
Beth: What?
Me: You're wearing stripey underwear.
Beth: Um, yeah. How did you know?
Me: I could totally see your underwear through your pants on the monitor.
Beth: Seriously? That's weird.
Me: No, that's awesome.

And it's true. Despite the fact that Beth was fully clothed, I could totally see her underwear in the monitor. Who needs superpowers when you have a baby monitor?

If you had special glasses or x-ray vision, what would you check out?

Posted by Chris at March 10, 2011 6:53 AM

Mostly people's underwear.

Posted by: You can call me, 'Sir' at March 10, 2011 10:41 AM

I'd like a pair of glasses that would let me view events of today from the future's eyes. Like, how much should I really be freaking out about the brush-fire-du-jour? Or how much *more* should I be paying attention to that offhand comment my kid just made; does it actually reflect something really bugging them?

But with x-ray vision, I'd agree with 'Sir': underwear. And is that *really* a gun you're carrying?

Posted by: harmzie at March 10, 2011 10:58 AM

Thanks, I needed a laugh.

Posted by: One Mom's Opinion at March 10, 2011 11:09 AM

I'm sure *Eventually* I'd move beyond the underwear spying haha. You and Beth sure do make me laugh.

Posted by: Heather E Pollock at March 10, 2011 12:15 PM

Now that, my friend, is a scary thought!

Posted by: Maribeth at March 10, 2011 1:28 PM

now THAT is funny.

Posted by: kati at March 10, 2011 9:45 PM

Thanks, I needed a laugh.

Posted by: Red Bull hats at March 10, 2011 10:34 PM