December 16, 2011

The Weeklies #197

The Weekly Homeowners Affliction. Leaky toilets.

The Weekly Read. This week I found myself plowing through the short but entertaining The Old Man And The Wasteland by Nick Cole. I got it cheap on Amazon and wasn't really expecting all that much. What I got was a modern retelling of Hemingway's similarly-named classic. What made it unusual was that it wasn't merely an update or retelling. It acknowledged it's namesake, continually referencing the situations and characters in The Old Man And The Sea. Very few novels can come close to the perfection of Hemingway's novel and to be fair this is far from that level of writing. But it is compelling and interesting and moving in its own way.

The Weekly Food. Pizza. I've had a lot of pizza.

The Weekly Music. I feel like I've listened to about three minutes of everything I own without having settled on anything to listen to for any length of time. It's been that kind of week.

The Weekly Television Fascination. Several episodes into Breaking Bad and, yep, I'm hooked.

The Weekly Most Interesting Person. I'm going with Vladimir Putin this week. The egocentric, shirtless horse-riding dictator is trying to get back in the saddle of the Russian presidency. But there seem to be quite a few who aren't going for it. He's one of those guys you want to learn more about but are kind of scared to.

The Weekly Question. Okay, the Duggers. I'm sorry for their loss and I cannot imagine how hard something like that is to go through. But I have a question. Are the cards they distributed at the ceremony they held - the cards that showed them holding the lost baby's little foot - a little strange? I've never been in that situation. I have no idea what I'd do. But I'm not sure I'd do that.

Posted by Chris at December 16, 2011 8:00 AM

Great show, isn't it?

Posted by: heathet at December 16, 2011 8:12 AM

No, I wouldn't do that. Kind of over the top, don't ya think?

Posted by: Maribeth at December 16, 2011 8:20 AM

I just read Old Man and the Wasteland myself a few weeks ago. I really enjoyed it. Then I looked into the author and it appears he's a religious nut. Bummer.

Have you read Vernor Vinge's A Fire Upon the Deep? I'm rereading it now and it's even better the second time through.

My husband and I are absolutely addicted to Breaking Bad. We have been watching it through Netflix so we are all caught up, except for the current season. It's a fabulous show!

I hadn't heard about the Duggars' ceremony, but yes, that is odd. But there's not much about them that isn't.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 16, 2011 8:25 AM

I think it's very strange and creepy. Looking at those photos (because I hadn't seen them so of course I had to look) made me sad because that should have been a private burial.
I realize it would be sort of touching if they were a premi baby's feet because that would be a miracle that they survived an early birth.
But this makes me think would someone do that with their dead grandmother? Will they do it if one of their kids dies?
I'm sorry for their loss too and I don't hate them because of their religion or their need to have 19 children (and counting!) I don't like that they are parading their family and subjecting them to all this attention. I think it's selfish and wrong.

Posted by: NancyB at December 16, 2011 8:39 AM

Actually, I do know a person that displays pictures of her stillborn granddaughter along side her alive grandchildren. I suppose everyone grieves in a way that makes them feel better.

Another one of your posters said that you doesnt have pictures of her dead grandmother. i do. I even have picture of my dead mother. I do not display them but I keep them. I don't think that makes me strange, just trying to hold on to a memory of the last time I seen them.

Personally I think it was pretty rude of you to bring this up, after you spent an entire post passing judgment on their choice to have another baby now in their worst hour you question how they choose to grieve. Classless...

Posted by: Linda at December 16, 2011 9:13 AM

I can tell you as a maternity nurse, when we have a stillborn, we do take pics and put them in a keepsake box for the parents to view at their convenience. The box has the baby's little hat, blanket and footprints. Some choose to hold their babies, some do not, some choose to look at those photos at a later time. I have seen some want to hold onto that baby for hours, which I find strange, but we try to understand that every person grieves differently and respect their ways.

Posted by: Christine at December 16, 2011 9:26 AM

I don't find it odd. I know three women that had still born babies, and all of them were photographed holding the baby and those photos are precious to them.

And, well. Just do a google search for "death portraits." We've been taken pictures of dead people since there was film.

People grieve in their own way - and I don't think it's fair to judge anyone for the way the choose to do so.

Posted by: Mindy at December 16, 2011 11:57 AM

some people don't take photos at all, some take the photos and keep them totally to themselves and some people show their families. i think the only weird thing here is TMZ releasing them, not the fact that they were taken! but that's TMZ and our society for you...

Posted by: kati at December 16, 2011 12:00 PM

I find everything about the Duggars creepy. I don't with the loss of a child on anyone, but my God, how much can that uterus take?

Posted by: Lisa at December 16, 2011 12:52 PM

Having lost a child at 25 weeks, back when they didn't think to snap a photograph, I think it is absolutely fabulous that they have photos for remembrance.
It's very common to have a photograph of the deceased on memorial cards (I'm never really sure what they call those things)that are handed out at funerals. The only difference is that those photos are typically taken during life. Seeing as they didn't have that option, I think what they did is fine. I don't find anything strange/weird/offensive about it.
I'm sorry for their loss.

Posted by: Jaycie at December 16, 2011 5:12 PM

So the is a little strange, but I knew someone who hate a later term miscarriage like this one and did something similar. Grief is a very personal thing and everyone deals with it in very different ways.

I lost my father a little over a year ago and I bet a lot of people outside my immediate family think I am dealing with it strangely. We said our goodbyes and now I choose to remember him with the fondness, love, and sarcasm we all shared when he was alive. There are still some times when the thought that he is gone hits me like a sucker punch, but, like my mom, I am viewing it as a new chapter. I think people are shocked by the lack of traditional "grief" they saw from all of us.

Posted by: ashley at December 16, 2011 6:03 PM

Personal pc Christmas day and Gorgeous days gathering together with other special day which you'll be planning on rejoice in

Posted by: pandora bracelets at December 16, 2011 9:06 PM

I don't understand it, but I'm glad they did have a funeral for the child. I wish it had been private, but so many women suffer with a miscarriage as a horrible secret rather than an open loss.

I was more appalled when I heard that Santorum and his wife brought their stillborn child home to show the other kids. Bringing a dead body is horrifying to me. And likely against all sorts of health codes, etc.

Posted by: alektra at December 17, 2011 2:46 PM

I view the photographs in the light of the following facts:
1. The Duggars are obviously 900% "pro-life" (i.e., anti-abortion). I read the photos as their attempt to persuade viewers to share that position.

2. The Duggars obviously get lots and lots and lots of money and perks (e.g., trips to all parts of the world) from their public performances. This memorial service was no private opportunity for the family to share their grief together, in private. It was another public spectacle--alas.

Posted by: jw at December 17, 2011 5:14 PM

More money needs to be invested into finding out why people loose their children like this. it really is heart breaking.

Posted by: matt hempsell at December 18, 2011 9:18 AM