September 29, 2003

Weekend Movie Report

In between buying cars and digital cameras, we managed to squeeze a couple movies in, courtesy of Netflix. Well, one and a half movies, truth be told.

We got all indie and decided to watch Kids. Verdict? Pure crap. To say it sucked would be making the understatement of the century. I'll steal a line from Good Morning Vietnam which may just suffice. I'd say that Kids "sucked the sweat off a dead man's balls." As Forest Whittaker's character said in the movie, "I'm not sure exactly what that means but it can't be good." The movie was basically this:

Boy has sex with virgins > Boy talks to everyone he knows, in lurid, crass detail about having sex with said virgins > Girls talk amongst themselves about sex, again in lurid crass detail > Girl has HIV test > Girl turns out to have HIV > Girl got HIV from virgin-conqueror Boy > Boy and friends do much druggage and beat up several people > Girl tries to do the right thing and tell boy > Viewer hits the STOP button on the remote control.

And while that might sound like a promising premise, its just so crass and tasteless that its violently uncomfortable to watch - which I'm sure was part of the reaction the director was going for. If the acting were decent, I'd have stuck with it. If the characters were even slightly likable, I'd have thought twice about hitting STOP halfway through. If the fake documentary style had worked for the movie instead of against it, maybe I would have given it more of a chance.

The good news is that The Ring was actually pretty decent. Very creepy. Creepy in a holy-christ-why-am-I-watching-this-if-I-ever-plan-to-sleep-again kind of way.

Posted by Chris at September 29, 2003 11:27 AM