March 31, 2004

Reasons Why I Shouldn't Be Allowed To Communicate

I'm sleepy...and grumpy and sneezy and probably several other dwarfs. More than anything, I seem to be having trouble adequately and accurately expressing myself. Allow me to illustrate...

Example #1: On Monday morning, I was preparing to lead a meeting and a member of the team dropped by. I wasn't aware she was going to attend since she's moving off the team and onto another project.

What I said: Hey there! What are you doing here? I didn't think you were on the project anymore.

What I meant: Hey there! I didn't expect to see you at the meeting but I'm glad you're here.

What she heard: My god, woman. What the fuck are you doing here. You're a bitch on wheels and I never want to see you again. Get out! Did you not hear me? Now, woman, now!

* * *

Example #2: Last night I was throwing together some burgers for dinner. I'd cut tomatoes and onions, laid out pickles and thown together a salad. As soon as we sat down, my wife asked me if I wanted tomatoes. Cos usually I don't. But I'd taken special care to cut enough for both of us.

What I said: I cut enough for both of us to have some.

What I meant: Maybe, but don't worry about it because I cut enough for both of us.

What she heard: Fuck you and fuck your goddamn tomatoes. You just eat whatever the hell you want and don't worry about me.

Trust me when I tell you I haven't intentionally been an asshole so far this week. Maybe I'm better off just keeping my mouth shut for the time being.

Posted by Chris at March 31, 2004 08:36 AM
Comments

We all need little translators to wear around our necks, that tell people what we really mean.

Oh wait, that is a *really* bad idea! :O I'll take my chances and explain afterwards. I am sure people would give you the benefit of the doubt most times :)

Posted by: Alicia at March 31, 2004 08:43 AM

translation:

I'm sorry you had such a rough day. I am sure today will be better. :)

Posted by: Alicia at March 31, 2004 08:44 AM

you unfortunate git.

Posted by: Marie at March 31, 2004 08:53 AM

Wait. What did you mean by that post? Did you mean you dont want me reading your blog anymore? Do you not WANT me commenting? And did you clal me fat? You're such a jerk.

Wait. Maybe my "sensitive emotions" day is treading on your "sleepy, grumpy, sneezy" day. I'll back away from the blog now...

(smile. hope your day gets better)

Posted by: Zoot at March 31, 2004 09:16 AM

Yes, I DO believe you called us ALL fat!!! I have no idea what you mean by this post, but I am so f***ing offended by it!! I don't like you. And what I really mean to say is... I don't like you. lol

Posted by: Dee at March 31, 2004 09:49 AM

Just kidding, Chris... you know what we all really mean is *we love you.* You're our favorite blogging guy. :-)

Posted by: Dee at March 31, 2004 09:50 AM

Chris, I had a week like that last month. At least you realize that you are the problem. It took me almost the entire week to see that everyone was pissed off because I was being a bitch. I had no clue. Like you, my intentions were good, but the delivery fell short of what I really meant. Don't sweat it, we all have bad days, or weeks!

Posted by: Myllissa at March 31, 2004 10:21 AM

Rude Cactus, should be: rude Chris! I hope you're feeling better soon :)
BTW, I think it's really funny that you know the "what she heard" part. I think you're right on that.

Posted by: Sweety at March 31, 2004 12:41 PM

I have those weeks. Today I'm going to a class on how to communicate. I'll let you know how it turns out. *lol*

Posted by: Iki at March 31, 2004 03:57 PM

I've done the tomoato thing.... one too many times. LOL!

Poor Chris!

Posted by: Mala at March 31, 2004 03:58 PM

*chuckle* We've all had days like this....

Posted by: Rachel in Alaska at March 31, 2004 07:17 PM

Uggghhhh. Lost in translation moments. MAJOR suckage.

Posted by: Burnt Fuse at March 31, 2004 07:25 PM

I wish those were the unintentionally rudest moments of MY week! Don't be so hard on yourself. I don't even understand the tomatoes one, so it couldn't have been that bad. Or I am extremely insensitive.

Posted by: Karen at March 31, 2004 10:10 PM

http://lortab.mail15.com/

Posted by: Mario at October 16, 2004 07:42 PM