December 02, 2004

Tx4 (The Results)

You've waited long enough and I have this sinking feeling I'm going to be trapped in meetings the whole damn day. As promised, here are the answers from To Tell The Truth Volume IV.

1. Truth
Yes, my friends, I was sixteen or seventeen, attempting to light a cigarette when a rogue optometrist decided to slam on his brakes for a green (I said green, people) light. Unfortunately, he was driving a 1978 General Motors Land Yacht which indicated two things - he wasn't doing so well as an optometrist and even my Jeep wasn't going to be able to claim victory. The entire front of the Jeep curled up under itself. And yes, the first thing he did was jump out if his car, hand me a card and ask if I had problems with my eyes. Dillhole.

2. Lie!
The first album I remember actually going and buying was Van Halen's 1984. I'm sure there were some before that. I'd already emassed a large collection of 45s (don't tell me you don't know what 45s are...I don't need to hear it). Among them was a Tears For Fears single with the song "The Big Chair" as a b-side. I loved it and played the hell out of it. Its only been in the last few years since all their albums were re-released that I've been able to get my hands on it again.

3. Lie!
I never wanted to be a psych major. I actually went to school for journalism but I didn't like their program. I jumped ship for the history department instead, focusing on Far Eastern history. I did double duty in the English department as well. The first psych professor I had convinced me that it wasn't the place for me. He was a great guy but looked remarkable like an elf. The only thing he was missing was a pointy pair of shoes. He gave multiple choice tests and, while you could usually eliminate one or two answers, after that it was anyone's guess. He had some mad test giving skillz.

4. Lie!
You guys liked this one. Which scares me a bit. Have I been sending out Dance Fever vibes or something? I recall the show, remember watching it sometimes as a kid but I was certainly never discovered trying out any of the moves. I waited until I moved out of my parents' house for that. Kidding!

5. Truth
Our pep squad had no regulations as to the sex of an applicant, only that the applicant wear the uniform. We were the Paul Revere Raiders so the uniforms were red, white and blue one-piece things with a short skirt and a picture of Paul Revere smack-dab on the chest. Sexy, no? On a dare, I tried out...and wore the skirt thingy. It wasn't pretty, folks. Not one damn bit. And no, before you ask there were no pictures taken.

6. Lie!
This is actually kinda sad and not something I'm altogether proud of. Its based in truth. But it wasn't my college orientation. It was my high school orientation. We had to go in a week before school started, in the afternoon (like that makes this better). I had a few way the hell to many beers then, with a few friends, hopped on a bus and headed to the orientation. Proud moment, folks.

7. Lie!
I've always said that I'm amazed I've been able to keep up with the blogging thing. Why? Because I've never, ever been able to keep a journal of any kind. I've tried and always failed spectacularly.

8. Lie!
As with all these, its rooted in some degree of truth. I was born in Argentina but Argentine laws prevented me from returning after I turned 18. Were I to fly in, I would have been forced to spend either two years in prison or serve in the military. Remember the Falklands (if you're answer is no, Google it)? Argentine officers shot their troops in the foot to keep them from abandoning their posts. So, no...I didn't like either of those options. They've since changed the laws but there have been random incidents involving other folks in my situation.

9. Truth
Perhaps this requires a separate blog entry, but there are few specifics I can provide. Let's just say this - a person in my family was in a position of power. Someone decided they had a grievance against the institution who'd granted that family member power. Instead of just writing a nice little letter or mailing a postcard, they let their fingers do the walking and made some very unpleasant threats. The end result? Bodyguards for a year and burly men with 9mms and shotguns surrounding my house. Oh, and there were the bomb sweeps of my car before I could get in. Overall, though, it was a positive experience. The folks looking out for us were incredibly cool and we still keep in touch with them to this day.

10. Lie (of course, its the last one)!
I did have an Atari 2600 but, alas, I don't now. My wife did buy me this joystick thingy recently that you plug into your TV set and its got bunches of the old Atari games. Tres cool.

So that's it. There you have it. But I'm sure you're more curious who the winner is, right? As it turns out, no one! That's right. No one correctly guessed all three (because you guys were all hung up on that Dance Fever question). That said, it would just suck for everyone to walk away empty-handed so there were a few folks who came pretty close, getting two out of the three correct. I'd appreciate it if Amy, Groovebunny, Amber, Dawn (the email only Dawn), Paul and Sheryl would drop me an email with an address to which I may send some tunes. And if I've somehow made an error in my tabluation, hey, its early. Let me know!

Thanks to all who guessed!

Posted by Chris at December 2, 2004 06:55 AM

Don't I just sizzle!!!

Posted by: Amber at December 2, 2004 07:10 AM

Dammit. :)

Posted by: alektra at December 2, 2004 07:34 AM


Posted by: debby at December 2, 2004 07:36 AM

Huzzah I am a winner!

Posted by: Paul at December 2, 2004 07:50 AM

I am shocked... Nice to know you are not remotely predicable.

Posted by: goodsnake at December 2, 2004 07:51 AM

wow I now know someone who had bodyguards :-)

Posted by: csm at December 2, 2004 08:21 AM

Boy, I was WAY off!

Posted by: Julie at December 2, 2004 09:30 AM

Wooohooo! Go Us!

Posted by: groovebunny at December 2, 2004 09:49 AM

Bodyguards? Never would've guessed that...sounds like a kind of fun experience, though! People probably thought you were someone important for awhile....em...not that you're not LOL..

Posted by: Randi at December 2, 2004 10:13 AM

Wow, I was wrong, wrong and wrong! Oh well. I did almost pick #9 because it felt like one of those "so unbelievable it is true" ones, but I changed my mind at the last minute.

Posted by: bad penguin at December 2, 2004 10:32 AM

Damn. I suck at tests.

Posted by: Jon in Michigan at December 2, 2004 10:51 AM

gah. I never win. At least I got #9 right.

Posted by: RockStar Mommy at December 2, 2004 11:30 AM

i'm happy i got one, but i was so sure about that dance fever one...

Posted by: laura at December 2, 2004 11:35 AM

Holy poop, you had bodyguards?? That is incredibly impressive. I can't believe that none of us got all three correct. Damn, Chris, we hardly knew ye!

Posted by: Heather at December 2, 2004 11:54 AM

I still wish there were pictures.

Posted by: bmh at December 2, 2004 12:44 PM

Pooh! Oh well. I hear you have a birthday on Sunday. Since I will be out of pocket most likely, Happy Early Birthday to YOU!

Posted by: Jazzy at December 2, 2004 12:52 PM

Well. . .one out of three ain't bad :)

Posted by: Colby at December 2, 2004 12:57 PM

oh, you have no idea how happy i am that #5 was it. *lol* I can't even explain why I thought that was cool.. one of those "it's so outrageous it has to be true" kind of things. *lol* :)

and what's up with the bodyguards?! we should definitely hear that story :D

Posted by: Manda at December 2, 2004 03:09 PM

Happy birthday, husband of the fishy one.

Posted by: Anne at December 2, 2004 04:23 PM

I'm so psyched that I was right about the bodyguards! And I figured it had something to do with Argentina too. I had customers who were originally from Argentina the other day and they told me about some of the hardships they had, and so it made sense to me.

Posted by: Heather at December 2, 2004 04:24 PM

Bodyguards AND cross-dressing - WOW! Look at you!

Posted by: Sue at December 2, 2004 04:35 PM

Boy I suck at this game - didn't get a single one right! Hehe

Posted by: Sabine at December 2, 2004 05:44 PM

Well, one out of three isn't bad!

Posted by: Jessica at December 2, 2004 06:51 PM

damn i need new tunes. i have a stalker, doesn't that count for something? Sigh. why why why. i need liquor. or sugar. either will do.

Posted by: amy at December 2, 2004 08:16 PM