July 19, 2005

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

I've been trying to think of a witty way to say this...but I am suffering from a tremendous lack of focus right about now. So, here it is...it is my honor and privilege to tell you that, on Friday morning, The Bean (TM) will be entering this world for what I hope is a long, healthy and happy life.

I'd be remiss if I didn't tell you that I, father of The Bean (TM), am freaking the fuck out. But I have embraced my freakoutitude and wholeheartedly expect to keep freaking the fuck out for, oh, at least the next 18 years. I shall, however, attempt to hold my shit together for a little while longer. But its gonna be close!

And what's new with you?

(...and yes, originally I did misspell the "dinner" in the post's title...like I said...I'm trying to hold my shit together here...)

Posted by Chris at July 19, 2005 01:52 PM

as i said to Beth, Congratulations! many uber-well wishes and best of luck with everything! i know things will be just fine. :)

Posted by: Judy at July 19, 2005 02:14 PM

Woo and most definitely hoo! All good thoughts for a safe and happy arrival.

Posted by: jen at July 19, 2005 02:14 PM


It's really okay to freak out. As long as freaking out involves some serious jumping up and down and dancing. What? You're not up for that? It's okay, I'll take care of it.


Posted by: samantha at July 19, 2005 02:17 PM

Wow - holy shit - I'm freaking out for you. Which I shouldn't be doing, being a savvy veteran dad and all. Now stop whatever it is you're doing and get some sleep.

Posted by: Jason at July 19, 2005 02:18 PM

Congratulations! Get all the sleep you can between now and then. ;-)

Posted by: keepergirl at July 19, 2005 02:18 PM

Yaaaaaay! Congratulations and best wishes to all of you!

First pictures of The Bean (and her name, finally!) will be posted by noon on Friday, right? ;)

Posted by: Amanda at July 19, 2005 02:19 PM

Congratlations! You will do fine! I don't need to remind you that you actually have the easiest job of the two parents. ;) The best part? You will be in love like you've never been in love before. There will be crying and poop and mass confusion, but you are far better equipped than many parents (in particular, me!) and most of us, I think, do okay. You will make a beautiful family. And isn't that the main point of life, after all? Bean's a lucky, lucky girl.

Posted by: Ms. Q at July 19, 2005 02:20 PM

The freak out factor is mitigated (a slight bit) by knowing when she's coming. Be glad you aren't subject to middle of the night labor sending you into a frenzy.

Go out for a nice dinner on Thursday night (since Beth will probably be on surgery prep "No food after midnight" orders) and pop back in as soon as you can with vital stats!

Posted by: MamaKaren at July 19, 2005 02:23 PM


Posted by: amy at July 19, 2005 02:28 PM

Big fat congratulations to you! I'm truly excited for you both.

Posted by: A.K. at July 19, 2005 02:29 PM

WooHoo! I agree with MamaKaren... go out and have some fun on Thursday night.

Posted by: amber at July 19, 2005 02:30 PM

Congratulations!! Freak out all you need, but you are going to be an excellent father-- starting officially on Friday (but really, already back in what? November?). Best wishes!

Posted by: bmh at July 19, 2005 02:32 PM

Woohoo! I wish you and Beth all of the luck and good vibes in the world!

Posted by: Heather at July 19, 2005 02:34 PM

WWWWoooooo! And may your whole dream about it only being "18 years" really happen! Mmwwwawahhahhahahahaha!

Posted by: Queen Of Ass at July 19, 2005 02:37 PM

Congratulations to you both! And don't worry, you're going to be great.

Posted by: Kerry at July 19, 2005 02:37 PM

as soon as i read that my brain went:

how awesomely wonderfully excitingly tubular..ly fucking amazing. :)

Posted by: kate at July 19, 2005 02:43 PM

Wow! Congratulations! What exciting news - definitely, as others have said on here, get as much sleep as possible between now and then. The sleep deprivation will go on for at least three months. But all in all, it is going to be so much fun, and you will be a great dad!

You don't really have "The Bean" trademarked, do you? I work in intellectual property, and because I am bored and don't feel like working right now, I looked up "The Bean" on the USPTO website. Get this - "The Bean" is trademarked as the following:

"The BEAN" is a natural treatment for concrete and wood surfaces made primarily of soybean oil; It works by penetrating the surface pours and then repelling the water from the surfaces;It can be sprayed,rolled, or brush applied; Only soap and water are required for cleanup

I think the soap and water part is pretty accurate, though. It's amazing how such a tiny human being can produce such massive amounts of poop, and sometimes soap and water is the only way - screw wipes.

Yes, I have too much time on my hands at work.

Good luck!

Posted by: Katie-be-bored-at-work at July 19, 2005 02:43 PM

CONGRATS! I can't wait to hear all about the Bean's (TM) arrival (we don't have to TM it at Beth's site, hmmmm)....I would be freaking out too - but in the best way possible!! You guys will ROCK as parents, of that I am sure (and I don't even know you!!)

Posted by: carrster at July 19, 2005 02:55 PM

Oh my gosh -- how exciting! Tell Beth not to worry. C-sections aren't so bad really. You two will be the best parents. I understand the freakout-itude, but you'll be fine. Really. I know you'll be busy-busy-busy, but please remember all of us out and post some pics and all the details. Best wishes to you both!

Posted by: Kris at July 19, 2005 02:55 PM

Just came from Beth's site. You finally get to meet the Bean live and in person! Good luck!

Posted by: Julie at July 19, 2005 02:59 PM

Ooh wow it's time all ready?? damn. it seems so soon! good luck!

Posted by: angel at July 19, 2005 03:03 PM

Chris, many happy wishes to you and Beth. If you two get time stop by my blog. I made a post specifically for Beth.

Posted by: Angelia at July 19, 2005 03:06 PM

you know, children are remarkably resilient human beings. now, i'm not saying you should use the baby as a football and i know no amount of good wishes will stop the freak out, but really, this is gonna be fun and exciting and glorious as well as frustrating and annoying and damn scary. that's the beauty of it all. my best to you and Beth and the baby of course.

Posted by: pea at July 19, 2005 03:07 PM

Congrats to you and Beth--freaking out is perfectly okay, so long as you're not the one holding the video camera ;) Looking forward to officially 'meeting' The Bean also!

Posted by: christina at July 19, 2005 03:09 PM

Congrats :)

Its okay to freak out, its a freaky thing especially the first time. And you will freak out even longer than 18 years. My Dad still worries about me like I am 10 but I love him so its all good ;)

Posted by: Chrissie at July 19, 2005 03:11 PM

Congrats Cactus!

I already gave my love over at the Fish's place. You guys are gonna be great parents and I can't wait to read your blogging tales of parenthood.

However, we understand that you three will want some time to yourselves and those of us out here will try our best to find some amusement while you're away. :)

Posted by: Holly at July 19, 2005 03:13 PM

congrats! hope everything goes as planned- and don't freak out too much, you and Beth will make fantastic parents. The Bean (TM) is one lucky little girl :)

Posted by: Emily at July 19, 2005 03:21 PM

OMG! You are so cute, as in give-you-a-big-hug-and-pat-your-back kind of cute, in your freakoutitude!

Don't stress too much, Chris. You are going to be a great daddy, I'm sure of it!

My piece of advice for the day: SLEEP, SLEEP, SLEEP, because after Friday, sleep will be but a distant memory.

Hugs to you and Beth! You're almost there!

Posted by: zanie at July 19, 2005 03:37 PM

whoa... already? it's all very exciting! congrats to you and beth :)

Posted by: Denise at July 19, 2005 03:38 PM

oh, congrats dadda!

Posted by: lizabetty at July 19, 2005 03:45 PM

Congratulations to both of you! You will be a great Dad!

Posted by: Sue at July 19, 2005 03:52 PM

Holy shite! congratulations to all of you!!! Excellent news! I can't believe it's that time already!

Posted by: Keri at July 19, 2005 03:58 PM

The freaking the fuck out will be greatly overshadowed by the oncoming love affair. Best wishes for all!

Posted by: bhd at July 19, 2005 04:16 PM

Woohoo! Be sure to post photos of The Bean! It's gonna be awesome, don't worry. :o)

Posted by: Milly at July 19, 2005 04:27 PM

AHHHHH I cant belive its time!! ahhhhhh

I'm so excited!

Congrats..you will be the best father! No really =)

Posted by: Veronica at July 19, 2005 04:27 PM

Congratulations! And I think a little freak-out is normal at this stage. Think of this week as a chance to learn to live with the freakoutedness before you have a small screaming equally freaked-out being in your presence.

Posted by: Dawnie at July 19, 2005 04:33 PM

freak out a little, have a drink and then enjoy your wonderful daughter this weekend :) hope the best for all of you!

Posted by: tiffanie at July 19, 2005 04:37 PM

by the way, that is also my mom's birthday :) so it's lucky and stuff. hehe

Posted by: tiffanie at July 19, 2005 04:39 PM

Hi Chris! Hopefully you remember me (Zandria's friend), I haven't commented for a while on your website, but that doesn't mean I haven't been reading, that goes for your wife and soon to be's websites as well. :) I just wanted to pass to you and Beth my sincere congratulations on your new arrival...only 3 more days!! Your life will definitely change drastically, but you will melt when you look into your daughter's eyes for the first time. Can't wait to see some pics!

Posted by: Dana at July 19, 2005 04:41 PM

like i told Beth, i am looking forward to see and hear all about her royal beaness! i'm so excited for you guys... didn't the time just fly by!


Posted by: monique at July 19, 2005 04:44 PM

chris -- you're going to be great. and so is beth. and the bean will great. you will all be in my thoughts this week. good luck! and for god's sake, don't faint! ;)

Posted by: laura at July 19, 2005 04:51 PM

How did you know she was coming on Friday? But anywho....CONGRATS!! At least you got everything done home improvement wise before Bean came! Good work!!

Posted by: Michelle at July 19, 2005 04:53 PM

Sending lot's o' love to you and Beth on Friday. Congratulations DADDY!

Posted by: verucaamish at July 19, 2005 05:01 PM

Wow! :D *eek!* I'm very excited. :D Congrats, Daddy! :)

Posted by: Manda at July 19, 2005 05:12 PM

WOW!! congratulations!! I send you both my best wishes and please post pictures!!!

Posted by: ava at July 19, 2005 05:13 PM

How absolutely mah-velous! The three of you will be in my thoughts on Friday. Let's see... Friday's child, I believe, is thought to be loving and giving? I don't know, there are so many versions of that rhyme. Maybe someone can straighten me out... All the Best :-)

Posted by: JuJu's Mom at July 19, 2005 05:19 PM

Eee! Congrats. Shit, I cried Chris. I'm so excited for you!

Posted by: Heather at July 19, 2005 05:21 PM

Oh too cool. I was getting a feeling that things were rather imminent. Does this mean the beanette hasn't flipped back over?

Posted by: hr mommy at July 19, 2005 05:25 PM

In response to Juju's mom, here is the traditional poem -

Monday's child is fair of face.
Tuesday's child is full of grace.
Wednesday's child is full of woe.
Thursday's child has far to go.
Friday's child is loving and forgiving.
Saturday's child works hard for a living.
And the child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is bonny and blithe and good and gay.

Sounds like your Friday child is going to be a real sweetie!!!

Posted by: Katie-be-bored-at-work at July 19, 2005 05:37 PM

Oh my gosh!!!!!! THIS IS IT!!!!! WHOO HOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Hang in there big daddy! :)

Posted by: chepooka at July 19, 2005 05:53 PM

How exciting! Now quick -- go take a really long nap -- you're going to need it.

Posted by: Martha at July 19, 2005 05:57 PM

wait, what? It's time? It's TIME? OH! IT'S TIME! *runs around looking for suitcase*

But how is that possible? She didn't look very large at all in those fiesta photos.

Posted by: kalisah at July 19, 2005 06:10 PM

a million and four congratulations! SO excited for you THREE!

Posted by: granola at July 19, 2005 07:08 PM

That is so fantabulous. And you know what? You won't be freaking out forever but you can count on frequent and totally random freak-opportunities.

Posted by: Deb at July 19, 2005 07:46 PM

Congrats! I wish you both the best of luck to a happy and safe delivery.

Posted by: tonya at July 19, 2005 09:14 PM

Fantastic, homie! Let us know how it all goes (without the icky parts, por favor).

Posted by: Broad at July 19, 2005 09:43 PM

How exciting! Congrats and good luck to all of you.

Posted by: Lisa at July 19, 2005 10:05 PM

To hear my parents talk (I'm 21) you don't ever stop freaking out. But eventually, you start sleeping better at night.


Posted by: Stephanie at July 19, 2005 10:09 PM

I just got back from Alaska to see this post! How awesome is this?? I'm so excited for you and Beth. My thoughts and prayers are with the 3 of you from here on out!

Posted by: Lori at July 19, 2005 10:29 PM

Well, as I have told your wife, I will be thinking and praying for you on Friday. But, can I make a suggestion? Well, I'm going to anyway. As someone who had to schedule the birth of both of my children, can I just tell you to go out and enjoy these last couple of days. Get a lot of sleep. In fact, you should probably start now! Good luck!

Posted by: Nicole at July 19, 2005 10:39 PM

OMG I go away for a few months (remember me I used to be at atomic-rain.net... I haven't had internet for months because we moved...) and look what happens. Congrats so, so, so, much. Your in for the ride of your life!!

Posted by: mandy at July 19, 2005 10:59 PM

Oh my gosh I am so excited for you!!!!! Everything will be fine hon, you're ready!

Posted by: Nina at July 19, 2005 11:12 PM

See now I am doing the happy dance for you and Beth and the Bean(TM). Enjoy these last few days of being baby free. Can't wait to see pics.

Posted by: Beanhead at July 19, 2005 11:26 PM

WOOOO! (I'm always late to the party, but congrats anyway!)

Posted by: Tara at July 19, 2005 11:51 PM

Oh my God, I can't believe I missed this post! HOW EXCITING! Congrats to you both!

Posted by: Spring at July 20, 2005 01:13 AM

I am the queen mother so ask me any questions via email anytime...about what? well, about....

sleep patterns (not you, you won't get ANY)
tummy or back (again, not you)
post partum sex (you probably won't get much of that either)
diarrhea (not yours)
bathing (The baby, not you. I sound like a broken record but you might not have time to bathe or shower)
grandparents kissing the baby (keep away!!!)
in-laws (enough said)
crying (yea, this one does relate to you)

no really

God Bless and Good Luck.

Posted by: beautiful face at July 20, 2005 01:52 AM

CONGRATS! Can't wait to meet her and find out her name.

Hope you don't fall off the face of the earth with the bean and the whole freaking the fuck out :)

Bises tous

Posted by: stinkerbell at July 20, 2005 05:49 AM

Freak the hell out, you are entitled. So is Beth. =) Outstanding!! Can't wait to hear all about it.

Posted by: Lauren at July 20, 2005 07:40 AM

Yay! Congratulations in advance!

Freak out all you want now, because after friday you'll be too tired to be freaked out.

Posted by: Pinky at July 20, 2005 08:06 AM

Congratulations! On Friday we'll all be thinking of you and Beth, and sending good vibes your way!

Posted by: Heather at July 20, 2005 08:16 AM

I am so excited for both of you. I am sure you will be a wonderful father and Beth a beautiful mother!! Breathe my advice to both of you... and enjoy it!!

Posted by: Stephanie at July 20, 2005 08:20 AM

Congratulations! I'm freaking a little bit for you guys; it's almost like I know you from reading your blogs.

Posted by: Fraulein N at July 20, 2005 08:31 AM

Congratulations:) That is the best way to start the weekend.

Posted by: Adi at July 20, 2005 09:39 AM

Oooh, Congratulations to you and Beth. Get ready for the most amazing thing in the whole, wide world...your daughter.

Posted by: Junkie at July 20, 2005 09:47 AM

Well, that is quite substantial news. Wishing you, Beth and The Bean a healthy, happy birth. Best wishes to all 3 of you.

Posted by: Polichick at July 20, 2005 09:55 AM

I will contribute to this long list of commenters and say good luck. I am sure everything will be good.

Posted by: ::c:: at July 20, 2005 10:04 AM

I will be thinking of you guys and hoping for a safe delivery. Of course I can't wait to see pictures of your new baby, but make sure you guys get some sleep before updating your blogs. ;)

Posted by: Kitty at July 20, 2005 10:14 AM


Posted by: Busy Mom at July 20, 2005 10:17 AM

Very exciting indeed :) Two more days! Wow!!! You'd be a total freak if you weren't freaking out! Good luck!!!!! And congrats :)

Posted by: Luna at July 20, 2005 10:56 AM


Posted by: Pixie at July 20, 2005 11:13 AM

Holy crap, is it that time ALREADY? And WHY AM I NOT having this baby on Friday? You lucky bastards!

But anyway, congratulations and good luck, you guys will do great. And I can't wait to see pictures!! :)

Posted by: RockStar Mommy at July 20, 2005 11:27 AM

Congratulations!!! (sorry. I'm slow!)

Posted by: ~L. at July 20, 2005 12:10 PM

eeee... congratulations! :)

Posted by: julie at July 20, 2005 12:18 PM

That is SO exciting. I can't even explain how thrilling those first few days are. Enjoy every moment and post a picture as soon as possible!

Posted by: HipMamaB at July 20, 2005 12:20 PM

welcome to parenthood .... you'll be freaking out regularly now. GET USED TO IT!!!! ;-)

Posted by: indigo at July 20, 2005 12:46 PM

wahoo! congratulations. enjoy the last few days of babylessness and then REALLY enjoy the many upcoming new days full of baby-goodness :)

i will be thinking of you three on friday!

Posted by: suze at July 20, 2005 12:49 PM

Right on! Actually, freaking the fuck out is completely appropriate.

You are going to rock this Dad gig. I'm eagerly awaiting the flickr slideshows to come ;)

Posted by: Jenny at July 20, 2005 01:23 PM

Oh, Mr. C...wow. What can I say? Not anything different, or wittier, or more congratulatory than anything that anyone else has just said. But I'm very happy for you and your wife, and wish you both all the best. Here's to The Bean! :)

Posted by: Zandria at July 20, 2005 01:37 PM

How exciting is it to know that you get to meet your daughter on Friday? I think that's pretty cool. I'll be thinking of you guys.

Posted by: bad penguin at July 20, 2005 01:38 PM

Oh Honey...just breathe!
You are going to be fine, the Bean will survive all the good intentions of your parenting! You are going to be a fine dad and Mrs. Fish is going to be a wonderful mother! I am so darn proud of you both! AND my heart is so warm knowing your family will be in your arms on Friday Morning! She will be CLOSE to my birthday! As mine is today! Hugs to all of you!

Posted by: Gypsy at July 20, 2005 05:04 PM

Oh, holy shit, you were sort of having your own huge day yesterday, now weren't you?

Posted by: Jen at July 20, 2005 09:41 PM

i stumbled upon this - but my husband and i called our baby the bean my whole pregnancy... you will be great... our little bean is now 16 months - we call him "the boy"

congrats to both of you.. anyone who worries about it will be great parents...

Posted by: jill at July 20, 2005 10:17 PM

Oh, it's almost time!! So, so excited for you.

Wishing you a beautiful birth experience and a very wonderful, happy babymoon.

Posted by: lu at July 20, 2005 10:36 PM

Take a deep breath. Let it out. You'll be fine. :-)

But, holy shit, is your life about to change forever....

Posted by: lucy at July 20, 2005 11:59 PM

Wait, where have I been? what the fuck is going on?

tomorrow Friday? the 22nd friday? C-section?

I'm so lost! AHHHHH!!

Posted by: Stacey at July 21, 2005 01:33 PM