September 27, 2005

Breaking News...Kinda

Not long ago, I bitched up a storm about the media. This is what I was talking about.




Somehow, against all logic, the death of Don Adams becomes breaking news. Yes, sitting above news of real honest-to-god tragedy, we get this little emergency nugget. Can you imagine the conversation between the geniuses that decided to greenlight this one?

Media Idiot 1: Hey, Don Adams died!
Media Idiot 2: Who?
MI1: Don Adams. The Get Smart dude.
MI2: The Get What who?
MI1: Secret agent...cone of silence...Agent 69 or whatever
MI2: Heh. You said 69. And I still don't know what the fuck you're talking about dude.
MI1: Um. Inspector Gadget!
MI2: Inspector Gadget is dead? This is big!
MI1: No, no. He was the guy who did the voice of Inspector Gadget.
MI2: Voice? Gadget wasn't real? Go go gadget bummer.
MI1: This is way more important that all that hurricane shit.
MI2: I smell breaking news, dude.
MI1: No way.
MI2: Way.
MI1: No way.
MI2: Way.
MI1: Radical.
MI2: Rest in peace, oh gadget man.

Posted by Chris at September 27, 2005 06:41 AM
Comments

I was so sad to hear that he died. I loved him as Agent 86.

Posted by: Kate at September 27, 2005 07:19 AM

I think the older stars are probably appalled and embarrassed themselves. Can you imagine?

Posted by: alektra at September 27, 2005 07:20 AM

I loved Get Smart, but I didn't even know the name til you pointed it out. But it never ceases to amaze me how twisted the media can be in its priorities.

Posted by: Heather at September 27, 2005 07:44 AM

Dont you think this is more of the whole 1984 stuff though? I remember reading a chilling book when I was young about the communist takeover of America. It was chilling cause they kinda just came into the schools and in tiny little acts began to undermine patriotism and country-identification.
You could see how with tiny little steps you could conquer a country.
This dumbing down of America seems like the same thing to me.
I also find it funny that reporters say not to worry about the huge media conglomerations with interests contrary to the average American "Ive never been told to drop a story."
Why would anyone be so dumb as to tell a reporter to drop a story? All you have to do is make sure that the airtime gets filled with crappy stories so there's little or no time for one you dont want. Or bury it on page 43.
Then claim you're only giving the public what they want.

Posted by: That Girl at September 27, 2005 07:47 AM

I didn't even know who that was until I read your post....its definitely ridiculous to even place that on the same page as the hurricane news.

Posted by: Dana at September 27, 2005 07:56 AM

who died?

Posted by: Betty at September 27, 2005 08:21 AM

oops sent this before I finished it haha.
I still don't even know who he is. I don't think I ever saw Inspector Gadget?!

Posted by: Betty at September 27, 2005 08:22 AM

I am proud to say I am 23 years old and know who Don Adams is. I loved watching Get Smart with my Dad on Nick At Nite...that and Welcome Back Kotter..."hey Mr. Kar-tair" LOL But to include that announcement with the devistation of the hurricanes is a little goofy. Did anyone catch President Bush's remark that Americans need to cut back on driving?! Great excuse not to come into work!!

Posted by: Michelle at September 27, 2005 08:39 AM

I stopped reading or watching CNN after 9/11 - what they define as "breaking news" worthy or what needs to be inserted on the crawler is some sort of perverted logic.

Posted by: Lee at September 27, 2005 08:48 AM

I hated to laugh at your post, considering the subject, but it was still funny :)

I agree, who decides what is breaking news? Obviously a bunch of fucktards.

Posted by: JuJuBee at September 27, 2005 08:59 AM

Um, I loved Get Smart and all, but ... "breaking news"? Really?

Posted by: Fraulein N at September 27, 2005 09:00 AM

i guess they were thinking it would be a little "comic relief" amongst all the tragedy. then again, the man died. but he does bring back funny memories... gosh, i remember watching get smart with my uncles... talking into my shoes... ahhh, good times. good times.

Posted by: monique at September 27, 2005 09:16 AM

I sometimes watch Fox News for the sheer entertainment of it and their "late breaking news"

"BREAKING NEWS: President needs to pee during UN Assembly"

Thank God they told me. What if I needed to pee too and they had to remind me.

Posted by: Grace at September 27, 2005 09:29 AM

Go go gadget bummer.

That's awesome. I might have to steal it.

Posted by: shannon at September 27, 2005 09:48 AM

Hey if they can keep us thinking about anything else other than the disasters around us, then that falls into their plans. Like 9/11, we were after Al-Queda and they were the worst threat, then we invaded Iraq, because they...THEY...were the bigger threat, even though they had nothing to do with the horrible happenings of that day. So let the masses mourn the loss of Get Smart man, and perhaps they won't see how ineffective the government is at getting us the aid we need and keeping us safe. Ok I'm off my soap box now!

Posted by: Nina at September 27, 2005 10:02 AM

wow. I didn't know he was the voice of Inspector Gadget - but yeah, how it that super duper breaking news? :/

Posted by: Manda at September 27, 2005 10:37 AM

I am still waiting for the Breaking News that Paris Hilton broke a nail. News! Ha! *snort* What a bunch of bozos. They went to college for that? Fantastic. Their journalism teachers must be proud!

Posted by: Ms. Q at September 27, 2005 11:41 AM

Though I feel sorry for my relatives and the other residents of south Louisiana. Some of us prefer to find a bit of humor in the situation.

Houston Evacuation Plan!

LATEST NEWS FROM EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT!!!

City officials just announced the official Houston 2005 Hurricane
Evacuation Plan:

Hispanics use I-10 West to San Antonio

Cajuns use I-10 East to Lafayette

Rednecks use 59 North to East Texas

Republicans fly Continental to Washington DC

Yankee and Democrats use 45 South to Galveston

Longhorns use 290 West to Austin

Aggies use the 610 Loop

Posted by: Theresa at September 27, 2005 12:11 PM

I loved Get Smart. But as information garnering goes, I liked reading about pumping up the cat better. THAT was a great story.

RIP Don!

Posted by: Vicki at September 27, 2005 01:31 PM

Dammit to hell. All you needed to do was hook him up for a little, uh, rehydration and we wouldn't have had this unbelievable national tragedy. You selfish bastard.

Posted by: bhd at September 27, 2005 02:02 PM

I didn't know who he was till you said 'voice of Inspector Gadget.' Now I know. That's kinda sad!

Celebrity news is always on the front page, no matter how young or old they are. For example, everyone was running the Ashton/Demi marriage story the other day...

Posted by: Kitty at September 27, 2005 02:41 PM

Well, I don't think it's necessarily breaking news either, but I DID blog about it.

Sorry about that, Chief.

Posted by: Scarlett Cyn at September 27, 2005 03:04 PM

I guess there were no cute blond girls that went missing .... wonder what ever happened to THAT story

Posted by: Kathryn at September 27, 2005 03:04 PM

What asshats.

Posted by: Queen of Ass at September 27, 2005 03:11 PM

Accept the fact that 99.99% of everything you read on the web is crap and move on.

I stopped reading the major news sites shortly after I stopped watching the cable news outlets.

Posted by: Allan at September 27, 2005 03:23 PM

Most of us who read your site probably ignore the majority of major "news" sites because of that and the other crap (that you've touched on before) that they sensationalize. I just shake my head and try not to give it a second thought, because, well... the media just doesn't deserve a second thought.

At any rate, I am deeply saddened at the loss of Agent 86 and Inspector Gadget's voice. I.G. is my hero!

Posted by: ironic1 at September 27, 2005 04:01 PM

Here's one worse: CNN interrupted a story yesterday morning about hurricane relief efforts to inform everyone that Demi Moore had married whats-his-face. They then launched into a 5 minute discussion about the older women dating younger men craze.

Then they went back to the hurricane.

Posted by: Bonanza Jellybean at September 27, 2005 04:31 PM

Mainstream Media Sucks!

Posted by: Angelia at September 27, 2005 05:08 PM

See, now, everytime you post something about the media, I thank the gods that I don't have a TV anymore. ;)

Posted by: Alison at September 27, 2005 05:15 PM

I'm just disappointd he wasn't on my Dead Pool list.

Posted by: Sheryl at September 27, 2005 06:22 PM

i hated inspector gadget, for real, he was a bumbling idiot....he let his little kid niece and a dog solve everything! and he always blew his boss up with that note, in real life he would have been fired! i wish claw got that bastard a long time ago......gee, i didnt realize i hated gadget so. yikes, RIP gadget voice man.

Posted by: lizabetty at September 28, 2005 06:06 PM

Sheryl, good point! I just re-registered for the next year... I didn't know Inspector Gadget's voice's name, though, nor did I ever actually think about the person behind that voice. As far as cartoon voices go, Mel Blanc is far more memorable ;o) Anyway, totally NOT breaking news.

Posted by: Carrie Jo at September 28, 2005 11:03 PM