May 30, 2006

Leeches, Hyenas and Teeth

Oh, hi there. Excuse the yawning, 'kay? It's not you. You're fabulous and exciting people but last night? It was hell. More accurately, parts of it were hell. Like the part between 9:30 and midnight. There was screaming - lots of it - and from the sound of the screams emanating from Mia's bedroom, we were forced to guess that one of several things was responsible.

1. Leeches. Giant, bionic blood-sucking leeches
2. Repeated exposure to the Billy Ray Cyrus hit Achy Breaky Heart
3. A battle with Satan
4. Gas, the likes of which could power the Hindenburg (oh the humanity!)
5. Forced viewing of Battlefield Earth
6. Wild hyenas gnawing at various appendages
7. Spontaneous stand-up comedy routine by Jerry Lewis
8. Teeth

While we're open to all possibilities, we're thinking it was probably teeth. Regardless, for two and a half hours it was wall-to-wall screaming. She's so cute, we'll let it slide. But still...that pretty much sucked.

Today, Official Vacation Day 1, we're going to hit the pool. Wish us luck. This could be, uh, interesting. And if you have any ideas for keeping leeches, hyenas and Jerry Lewis at bay, let me know. Just in case it wasn't that teeth thing.

Posted by Chris at May 30, 2006 08:10 AM

I could probably fend off the leeches and hyenas but I don't know about Billy Ray (and I like country music in small doses).

Enjoy your vacation. It sounds long overdue.

Posted by: ann adams at May 30, 2006 08:14 AM

Ah, those days are still fresh in my memory, even though it's been a while. Those teething ring-things that go in the freezer are a wonderful thing, let me tell you. I don't know if they'll help Mia, but they did with Elizabeth.

Posted by: amber at May 30, 2006 08:17 AM

I hope it's a great day. And that all those terrible problems have gone away with the night.


Posted by: cas at May 30, 2006 08:29 AM

someone told me to rub whiskey on my kids' gums. (For the teething, but the whiskey could be good for 1-3, 5 & 7 ...?)
I am no longer in touch with that someone.

(Although, 3 years into this parenting thing, I wonder if I should have kept that someone around. I see now how whiskey is an excellent solution to a lot of problems.)

Posted by: s@bd at May 30, 2006 08:44 AM

I can remember nights like that. I really can. And they no longer occur with any regularity. Any my youngest is only 3. Does that help at all? 3 is not really that old. So sanity is not THAT far away.

Have you tried vanilla extract? Rubbing vanilla extract on teething gums provides some relief. Momentarily, anyway.

Posted by: Alissa at May 30, 2006 08:48 AM

I am so glad I'm done with the teething stage. I managed to make it through with half my mind (some people may question this point). However you'll find as they get older there ARE worse things than teething...Sorry!

Hope you have a great time swimming and you guys enjoy your vacation.

Posted by: MrsJoseGoldbloom at May 30, 2006 08:51 AM

my bro-in-law and his wife use the whiskey trick. Problem is, he's a collector and apparently the niece has refined taste, and will now only respond when they use the expensive stuff...None of that cheap whiskey for her, it has to be from the 500 pound (yes, pounds, not dollars) bottle. heehee.

Posted by: suze at May 30, 2006 09:04 AM

Oh boy, Mia is going to LOVE the pool. Is it too soon to start swimming lessons? Have a great time.

Posted by: Beth in StL at May 30, 2006 09:12 AM

Ahhhh, once you hit the water, all will be right with the world.

We used to take clean washcloths, get them wet, roll them up into a cigar, then role that into a spiral, and freeze it. We'd pull those out any time we see those little chompers trying to break through the gums...the kids LOVED to put the "turtles" (as we called them) in their mouths.

Posted by: kristen at May 30, 2006 09:22 AM

I seem to remember going through a lot of Motrin during the teething months. And a lot of those freezy chew things. Hugs - hope it gets better soon.

Posted by: Traci at May 30, 2006 09:30 AM

Baby Anbesol. It's pink. Tastes like bubble gum. I tried it on my lip (when my kids were babies) just to see and it went dead immediately. Rub that stuff over her gums and it'll really does help.

Plus a hit of Baby Tylenol.

Posted by: wordgirl at May 30, 2006 09:51 AM

Oh...and during the day? Popscicles. Frozen fruit-tasting stuff makes them feel no pain and it's okay for them to have more than one.

Posted by: wordgirl at May 30, 2006 09:53 AM

Have you tried a frozen washcloth? You can wet it with whatever liquid she likes and it's nice and soft. If she gets gas too, try pickle juice on the washcloth (if she likes pickles) because that will help dispel the bubbles.

Posted by: Much More Than A Mom at May 30, 2006 10:01 AM

If the whiskey thing doesn't work for Mia, you can always drink it, I'm sure it will help regardless if you or Mia are using it! And have fun at swimming! :)

Posted by: Michelle at May 30, 2006 10:02 AM

Looks like you got a lot of great advice. Me, I'm entering the braces stage! Well, not kids. So it's been a while since the teething thing. But I did just battle Satan the other night and incidentally, he HATES Billy Ray Cyrus music--Go figure!

Have a great day at the pool! Happy Vacation Day #1!

Posted by: Kate at May 30, 2006 10:09 AM

If your wife is breastfeeding, I've heard that breastmilkcicles area a great idea, too.

Posted by: dreadmouse at May 30, 2006 10:27 AM

I have found that whiskey works very well. If you drink enough of it the screaming doesn't bother you anymore.

Posted by: Jeff A at May 30, 2006 11:13 AM

Poor Mia. Poor mom and dad. :( Enjoy the vacation! Swim! Float! Smile! Have a fabulous time... Oh do I remember those days...

Comment from Keli just two days ago - "Thank you for raising me around water so that I'm comfortable in it and so I can consider myself a swimmer and a water person. So many of my friends are not and are just totally freaked out and uncomfortable in it." Totally out of the blue compliment from a teen! Woohoo!!!

Posted by: Keri at May 30, 2006 11:26 AM

Why don't you let Mia keep all of the various teething toys in her crib? That way, when the hyenas or Jerry Lewis approach, she can defend herself by chucking them at the night time intruders.

Posted by: kim at May 30, 2006 11:27 AM

Poor Mia :(

I remember those days, and I am SOOO glad they are behind us.

So, I though was Billy Ray Cyrus, but he has managed to wiggle his way back into my life via Disney Channel's "Hanna Montana." No Achy Breaky Heart yet... but I KNOW it is coming in one of the episodes, I just know it.

You know, thinking about it, I would tolerate the other seven possibilities with glee, so long as I was never exposed to Number 5! ewwww... Just the thought of seeing a minute of it ever again could... :: shudder ::

Posted by: Latte Man at May 30, 2006 11:35 AM

I hope that you and the family have a wonderful vacation!!!!!!

Posted by: Kelly M. at May 30, 2006 11:42 AM

I feel for ya -- I'm in the thick of teething hell right now with Oliver. I keep wet, knotted washcloths in the freezer for him to gnaw on. It quiets him for a few minutes so I can bang my head on the wall in peace.

Posted by: mama_tulip at May 30, 2006 11:43 AM


Posted by: phil at May 30, 2006 11:48 AM

Ok, so here is my advice on what worked for us.. take it .. leave it.. whatever.. but I'll tell you.. ;)

First off Ambesol.. works great.. but if you want to try other things.. or something that may be soothing longer than the minute or two before the numbing stuff wears off.. here is my home remedy.. Chamomille (sp) tea.. after brewing.. take a wash cloth (or 2 or 5 or 500) and soak them in the tea, ring it out.. stick it in the freezer.. then when an episode of teething occurs.. you've got the soothing Chomomille and a nice cool cloth for her to suck on..
although a shot of whiskey never hurts.. (for you not Mia)

Posted by: molly at May 30, 2006 11:52 AM

be careful about stuff like orajel/anbesol/teething tablets... a lot of doctors don't recommend using that stuff for reasons like-- 1. some of them (don't know which) contain something called belladonna which has a lot of shady side effects, and 2. some contain an ingredient (don't know what it's called) that actually hardens the gums, making it harder for the teeth to break through and obviously just causing more pain...

my son didn't have a hard time with teething, but if pain relief was needed i stuck to a homeopathic oral pain reliever and all the above home remedies-- cold rags, popsicles, the occasional finger of mine to chew on. :o)

teeth suck!

Posted by: master b. at May 30, 2006 11:52 AM

Oy, sorry for you guys. I'm still kind of shell-shocked over the teething.

We could never get B to hold still enough to get any sort of teething gel on her poor gums, so I don't know which kind would work best.

Lots of Advil, all around, was usually our approach.

Posted by: Kate the Shrew at May 30, 2006 12:12 PM

Have fun at the pool:) Hope you are enjoying your time off.

Posted by: Adi at May 30, 2006 01:13 PM

I use Hylands teething tablets for Sam. He had no interest in any sort of frozen or chilled teether. Maybe a wolverine under her bed to keep the others away?

Posted by: Annie at May 30, 2006 01:14 PM

Enjoy your vacation! Hopefully we will see some cute pics of Mia by the pool! :)

Posted by: Dana at May 30, 2006 01:22 PM

I hear ya. My boy just popped out two in the last month. He's done well, but there's a bit of crying involved.

Posted by: Brad at May 30, 2006 01:33 PM

Have fun at the pool. Um teeth, I should remember this. um...whisky. Just kidding. Pedia-care worked the best. Generally if she was in that much pain, it should come through soon. Try wetting a wash cloth, putting it in the freezer and letting her chew on it for awhile.

Posted by: Melissa at May 30, 2006 02:21 PM

I'm guessing a pack of wild dogs. Or geese. Geese are scary.

Posted by: Queen of Ass at May 30, 2006 02:25 PM

Have fun at the pool!

Posted by: Lisa B at May 30, 2006 04:06 PM

Bourbon for everyone!!

Posted by: chantel at May 30, 2006 04:16 PM

Happy vacation!

Posted by: Heather at May 30, 2006 05:33 PM

I think you can find anti-leech, hyena, and Jerry Lewis charms at your local gypsy retailer. Sometimes if you buy two charms, you get a hex for half price.

Posted by: Gavin at May 30, 2006 05:34 PM

Since the trauma has already passed, I'm going suggest for next time a combination of several of the good ideas mentioned above. How about a breastmilkcicle dipped in Anbesol, served with a bourbon (back) wrapped in a frozen wash cloth? The latter of course being for mom and dad... although I'd prefer a good cognac or vodka tonic myself.

Posted by: Johnny Smoke at May 30, 2006 06:22 PM

No advice (enjoy it - it's rare for me); just sorry about the hyenas and the minimal sleepage for all. On the bright side: no meetings!!

Posted by: shelley at May 30, 2006 07:27 PM

She's already teething???!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Pixie at May 31, 2006 04:12 PM

Oh yeah, those wild gnawing hyenas have been visiting us regularly lately -coincidentally each morning after finds baby V.J. with a new tooth -we're currently up to 8. I really don't know why our kid has to get ALL of his teeth within a couple of weeks.

Posted by: HR Mommy at June 2, 2006 03:08 PM