June 27, 2006

Life In The Danger Zone

I need your help. There's no one to whom I can turn, because they hear me use the word whom and think I'm a big pretentious ass and walk the other way. Okay, not really. But I do have a question - what's the etiquette for greeting someone of the opposite sex when they're exiting the bathroom?

Here's the problem. When I leave my office suite and head to the men's room, I must first pass the ladies' room. I have nothing against ladies or their room, however, this invariably leads to multiple uncomfortable greeting situations on a daily basis. At least twice a day, I run into a woman I know exiting the ladies' room but I'll be damned if I know what to say. This is compounded by the fact that looking at them usually means looking in the general direction of the restroom and I certainly don't want to give the impression that I'm doing that, right?

I have, therefore, dubbed the area of increased greeting hazard The Danger Zone. Please refer to the diagram on the left. Note: Features of the ladies' room are entirely theoretical. I can only imagine what treasures lie beyond the bathroom door since users seem to spend such vast amounts of time within. Oh, and whilst in The Danger Zone, please say hi to Maverick and Goose...and Kenny Loggins.

As I see it, given the problem outlined above, I have a few options when encountering someone exiting the ladies' room:

a) Completely ignore them. I should look at my shoes and hum the "gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now" song in an effort to pass the buck for my insensitivity from my brain to my bladder;

b) Greet whomever it is and run the risk of appearing as though I'm glancing in to the restroom thus becoming the office perv; or

c) Raid Mia's supply of diapers and quit going to the restroom entirely.

So, which is it?

Posted by Chris at June 27, 2006 07:15 AM
Comments

If I were exiting the ladies' room, and you looked at me, I would not think that you were trying to peek in. If I were exiting the ladies' room, I'd probably just smile because I really don't have much to say when leaving the bathroom. I was peeing. So what? That's not good conversation. Perhaps you should apply the "don't speak unless spoken to" rule here.

In my office, somehow I end up going to the bathroom at the same time as one of the other guys. We talk when we walk down the hall. We enter our respective doors. We do our business. We emerge at the same time and resume the conversation. It's very odd.

Posted by: Emily at June 27, 2006 07:27 AM

I'm curious why the men's room has two more sinks than the women's room? Aren't women typically cleaner and more likely to wash their hands than men? What was your thinking behind this when you drew the diagram?

Posted by: Curious at June 27, 2006 07:28 AM

If you catch their eye just smile and keep going. If you don't then just keep going without saying anything as if you didn't see them. Simple, see?

Posted by: Red at June 27, 2006 07:31 AM

I agree with just the smile.
Or, maybe you could go to another bathroom that's in the other direction.

Option c - no good

Posted by: cas at June 27, 2006 07:38 AM

A brief acknowledgement via smile is good. No, "HEY, DIDJA DROP A LOAD?!"

I used to work for an admiral who always seemed to exit the men's room when I exited the ladies, and would put his arm around my shoulders and make small talk as we walked back to our office.

Shudder.

Posted by: Nicole at June 27, 2006 07:47 AM

As if we would ever have a ping pong table in there. Pfffft.

Posted by: Lauren at June 27, 2006 07:58 AM

A ping pong table? What were you thinking?

I would just say smile and nod, if you make eye contact.

My boss's office is very near the ladies room here, and I almost always see him as I'm leaving. He looks up every time that damn door opens, so if you're looking in that direction, you're caught. Just smile and nod. Just don't ask if everything came out OK, as he does occasionally. That can make for some strange conversation...

Posted by: Alissa at June 27, 2006 08:04 AM

Ask them what they sang during the bathroom singalong this time, and then request "Piano Man."

Posted by: Ginny at June 27, 2006 08:05 AM

I must be a pretentious ass too, 'cause I just used the word whom in a comment to your wife yesterday.

I'm with the smile and nod group. If you passed me, I would assume that you're there because you have to uh... use the facilities... and don't want to start a conversation anyway.

Posted by: ktjrdn at June 27, 2006 08:17 AM

The men's room in our building is right on the way to the exit. When a man leaves the restroom, there is a mirror that is the length of the wall and is from ceiling to sink. As the door opens and you glance that direction, if you catch it just right you have the perfect view of the back of any man that is standing at the urinals. I have since learned to stare at the broom closet when I walk by, but the first two or three times I did this (ok, I'm slow to catch on) it really surprised me. At first, it didn't even dawn on me what was taking place. Then when I realized it was like OMG, don't they KNOW we can see them peeing? I suggest the diaper thing, but you gotta change them too ya know.

Posted by: wlfldy at June 27, 2006 08:22 AM

Today's bathroom sing-along number is:

I'm singing in the rain.

Posted by: wlfldy at June 27, 2006 08:25 AM

Smile and nod. Definitely go with that. DO NOT ask if they need any "assistance" or if "Everything came out OK". These are questions that can only be asked jokingly by the same sex or, if you're really just that comfortable with your co-workers.

Posted by: Michelle at June 27, 2006 08:37 AM

The piano cracks me up becasue I picture Sonny from "It's a living" in there singing for tips.

Say "You're Done? I didn't get a chance to hit record on my spy cam yet."

Posted by: Bill at June 27, 2006 08:46 AM

I, personally, would go with A. Or go about 15 minutes before you really have to go and maybe you won't run into anyone. We don't really have that problem here, as there are only two men so we rarely run into them around the bathroom area, and there are only about 20 people who use the bathrooms that I use at work. I guess working for a small company has some benefits when it comes to the bathroom etiquette situations

Posted by: Jessie at June 27, 2006 08:49 AM

I seem to have a bladder that is in synch with the bladder of the CEO of the company, and I always seem to find myself in the can at the same time as him. I *hate* that.

But, I digress. I too have to walk the danger zone at the office. Normally, a nod of acknowledgement is a good thing. Nothing beyond that. :)

Posted by: martin at June 27, 2006 08:52 AM

i guess... don't speak unless spoken to? or you could just say hi and walk away. i don't know.

i love your diagram of the ladies room. you forgot to add the flat screen television that only has the lifetime channel on it.

Posted by: Denise at June 27, 2006 08:52 AM

Yeah, smile and nod, if you must. Trust me, the Danger Zone is just as awkward for us as it is for you guys.

Your rendering of the ladies room cracks me up, though. A piano? A ping-pong table? Just WHAT do you think we get up to in there? Actually, you could have drawn a pee puddle in the ladies room too for the sake of authenticity. Sad but true.

I've seen the sitting area in some fancier bathrooms, though. Because us gals like to sit around and shoot (and smell) the shit while we're in there, I guess? The ladies room in the Macy's where my mother shopped when I was a kid actually had a chaise longue. No, seriously. Excellent for those times when you have the vapors, I would imagine.

Posted by: Fraulein N at June 27, 2006 08:54 AM

I keep trying to convince my husband that I should get Depends for the remainder of the pregnancy, however he is convinced that it is "crossing a line" or some shit like that. Therefore, I vote for the diapers.

Posted by: Leah at June 27, 2006 08:54 AM

Did you really create that diagram with your bathroom hands?

As for my advice...I think you should just wear sunglasses and keep shut. Like you're too cool to talk to anyone exiting the bathroom.

Posted by: mrsmogul at June 27, 2006 08:55 AM

I've got a similar setup at work, with ELEVATORS across from the bathroom (gee thanks, Mr. Architect) - I also vote for the "quick pseudo-smile and nod" and would follow it with checking out your own shoes.

Posted by: Betti at June 27, 2006 09:01 AM

Normally around here when that happens, a simple hello, nod, or smile is sufficient--course, only two males have offices on this floor anymore, the rest are upstairs...

Posted by: christina at June 27, 2006 09:08 AM

I'd definitely not think that you were trying to get a peek inside our top-secret "Area 1&2".

It'd be nice if you just said a "Hey". Or even if you chose to ignore, I dont think anyone would mind. And please tell me you did'nt MAKE that restroom floor plan!

Posted by: Dee at June 27, 2006 09:12 AM

Diapers ... definitely go with the diapers.
tg

Posted by: Tommy Gunn at June 27, 2006 09:13 AM

see, i don't get the whole nervousness around the washrooms bit...everybody poops. isn't that what the book says?

If it is someone you would normally greet while walking around the floor, I'd say smile, perhaps even say "hi".

and, aside from the pingpong table, I'd love to have you design my next office bathroom... ;)

Posted by: suze at June 27, 2006 09:18 AM

Okay, maybe I am just old. Maybe having had two large babies that wrecked my bladder has made me less sensitive to this problem.
When you gotta go, you gotta go!
You can either become less sensitive about it and smile all the while, or...
Mia's diapers are looking like your best bet!

Posted by: Maribeth at June 27, 2006 09:21 AM

Ask 'em, 'Everything come out all right?', and then laugh and run. It's really the only mature thing to do.

Posted by: Contrary at June 27, 2006 09:31 AM

you could avert your eyes over to the snack machines, or just kind of mutter "hey" and don't make eye contact..

Posted by: cmhlgirl at June 27, 2006 09:46 AM

Smile politely, looking at her only in the eyes, and say hello, and move directly to your destination without further eye movement.

Posted by: Queen of Ass at June 27, 2006 09:47 AM

Yeah, I agree with the earlier commenters and I typically go with the smile, nod, and a quick "hi" method of awkward greetings.

I actually had a client where the women's restroom had a sitting area. There was also a refrigerator in there but it was strictly for breast milk. But I can't say I've ever run across a ping pong table or piano for sing-alongs (song of the day is "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head"). The pee puddle in the men's room is a nice touch.

Posted by: Beth in StL at June 27, 2006 09:53 AM

Uh...I never knew it was an issue. Maybe I'm violating etiquette all over the place and don't know it. Hold me...I'm scared.

Posted by: wordgirl at June 27, 2006 09:54 AM

I thik you should look them squarely in the eye, and say someting like, "How are you? I hope everything came out in the end."

Posted by: Allan at June 27, 2006 09:59 AM

Compared to the "Leaving the facilities with the dude that just gave birth in the stall next to you all whilst looking like you hadn't just dropped in on a game of 'Battle-shits' in progress..." the bumping into a m-o-t-o-s (Member of the opposite sex) is a non issue. Smile or Smilenod. Easy.

Posted by: Greg at June 27, 2006 09:59 AM

Possible greetings:
1) Hey! Have you lost weight?
2) I wish they'd get those fans fixed!
3) Hi! Ya'll have the sports section in there?
4) Woo, I hope these walls are soundproof!

Sinks: I think the men have more cuz the hope is, if they put more in, there a chance... just a CHANCE, we'll use at least one of them.

Piano: Would be useless in the men's room, we only sing one song: "I've Got The Whole World In My Hands."

Posted by: sheets at June 27, 2006 10:08 AM

I can't get past the fact that you dropped a reference to Top Gun and Kenny Loggins in this entry. Dude, can you see me bowing to your greatness?

No, really, I laughed my ass off at that, and now I don't have any suggestions for your dilemma.

Posted by: Alison at June 27, 2006 10:08 AM

as you walk by, grab your crotchal region and say "hey baby, it all come out alright?"

it's your choice whether the crotch grab is in a "i gotta go pee" way or a "i got it goin' on" way.

Posted by: monique at June 27, 2006 10:13 AM

LOL Diagrams, hurrah! Though, in thinking about it, maybe if we gave up the piano, we'd have room for a couple of extra stalls, and there wouldn't always be a line!

I agree with the smile 'n' nod faction.

Posted by: Kate the Shrew at June 27, 2006 10:17 AM

Oh like they don't already know you're a perv... ;)

Posted by: Deepblue at June 27, 2006 10:17 AM

As you walk by the ladies' room, whistle loudly and say "Whassup LADIEEEES!" or "Holey moley, what is that smell?!?" Or if someone is coming out of the bathroom, say loudly: "Whoa! Someone had asparagus for dinner!" ;) But that's just me.

Posted by: erika at June 27, 2006 10:19 AM

I think a dignified nod in their direction is all you need to do. It kind of says "we both use the toilet. I see that. I know that. Let's move on."

Posted by: meghan at June 27, 2006 10:33 AM

Well, first of all, I agree with the smile and nod group. But I had to laugh out loud when I saw your diagram and read this post -- your bathroom layout is *exactly* like mine here at work (and I work for a large male-dominated defense company). I generally do the smile-and-nod thing, but NOTHING freaks me out more than to have some guy *speak* to me as he is walking out of the bathroom WITH A NEWSPAPER TUCKED UNDER HIS ARM!! AAAAAAAHHHHH!!! There must be some rules of engagement here, and the 'newspaper under the arm' CLEARLY says that there should be no verbal exchange going on here. I do not want to even imagine what you are doing in there with that newspaper. shudder!

Posted by: Niki at June 27, 2006 10:37 AM

Here you go. You gaze intently at the floor as though you have a very important project on your mind. Then, just as you are about to pass the person, you glance up as though surprised to find another person nearby, nod and smile distractedly, then go back to staring at the floor, possibly muttering to yourself something work related. You are so in the work zone, you have no time for non-work activites, and even restroom breaks are actually "think tank" situations for you. Way to go, promotion here you come!

Ps..you forgot the "clothing optional" vestibule where we can make out in the ladies room.

Posted by: Cassandra at June 27, 2006 10:42 AM

you look at your shoes. never look the woman in the face.
unless of course, you've become so obsessed with your shoes that you have mistakenly entered the wrong door.
Then, while still fascinated with your shoes, you get the hell outta dodge and forget anything you might have inadvertently seen ....

gosh, that was close.

Posted by: speckledpup at June 27, 2006 10:43 AM

You are one funny man! I never really thought about it but I suppose nodding with a smile is appropriate.

This reminds me of a time when I had to take my son (2yrs old) in the bathroom at McDonalds. The second we walked through the door he said "phew it smells like fish in here", I was mortified.

Posted by: MrsJoseGoldbloom at June 27, 2006 10:49 AM

You forgot the storage closet in the Ladies Room for the pillows. You know, for when we strip down into our undies and have pillow fights.
You did know that's why we go in groups, right?

I work with all men so I can't help you. I've picked up too many of their vulgar habits.

Posted by: fauve at June 27, 2006 11:00 AM

First of all, there should be MORE sinks in the ladies room. Secondly, it's pinball, not pingpong (and sometimes a TV). Finally, a polite head nod or simple "hello" should be adequate.

Posted by: Celina at June 27, 2006 11:24 AM

What is it about toilets? I ran a toilet paper survey when I first started granny. Over or under the roll. People came from everywhere.

At least it gives us something new about which to worry. (See how I avoided ending the sentence with a presposition?)

Nod and smile. You have to look at the women's room to avoid slamming into someone.

Posted by: ann adams at June 27, 2006 11:29 AM

Hey, you forgot to put the massage table in the womens's restroom.

My restroom exiting etiquette consists of pretending that neither of us is anywhere NEAR a restroom. Denial, it's not just a river...or a pee puddle.

Posted by: Kristen at June 27, 2006 11:38 AM

Well, don't ask how everything came out.

hahaha

I would think that you should just have a newspaper you should carry with you and be studiously reading an article....

Cheers.

Posted by: H.A. Page at June 27, 2006 11:41 AM

You left out the catwalk, the full-length mirrors, and the lingerie racks. (Heh. I said racks.)

And the answer is d. Greet whomever it is and make direct eye contact only, so that there is no risk of appearing to be the office perv. Good luck avoiding that puddle.

Posted by: shelley at June 27, 2006 11:56 AM

Texting. You should be texting on your cell phone so that you are looking down when you pass by.

Posted by: Janet at June 27, 2006 12:10 PM

You want to know what's sad? Our ladies room very much resembles the mens room in your drawing...sans urinals. I think your only option is C, my friend. We'll all buy stock in Pampers!

Posted by: Sparkle Pants at June 27, 2006 12:22 PM

wow... you are such a freak! and, the more feakish you act on your way to the bathroom, the more pervy you will appear. you should just walk with confidence, head held high and greet whomever you encounter. and the whole time you are doing this, mumble under your breath "tinkle tinkle tinkle tinkle"

Posted by: jodi at June 27, 2006 12:25 PM

Make brief eye contact, say hello, and be on your way.

By the way, you forgot to include the Tilt-a-Whirl in your diagram of the ladies' room. And the bar.

Posted by: Liz at June 27, 2006 12:25 PM

Awesome graphics there. We do love a good bathroom singalong.

I would just go for the simple hey or hello with an understanding head nod that says "just passing by, don't have time to talk"

Posted by: Carrisa at June 27, 2006 12:34 PM

In my opinion.. That is a little spastic.. ;)

Our office layout is very similar.. there is a BIG open area between the bathrooms and the dungeon (IT area..) I have never thought about NOT greeting someone of the opposite sex on the way to or from the bathroom.. But maybe I am making them uncomfortable by saying "Hello, How's your day going?" when all they are thinking is.. "gotta go, gotta go, gotta go!"

Posted by: molly at June 27, 2006 12:36 PM

You think that's awkward. My office, we have to go through a door into this narrow hallway. You turn left and the boys' room is on the right. Continue forward and you'll find the ladie's. A lot more awkward and your "danger zone" I tell ya.

In that situation, I usually just look up, smile, and say, "Hey ya". Hehe.

Posted by: oakley at June 27, 2006 12:44 PM

I have a question too. What do you do when you are IN the restroom with another co-worker and you watch them exit the stall and NOT wash their hands? (sorry no graphics, however are they really necessary in my case for this question...I think not)

It makes me want to buy an industrial size container of clorox wipes and leave them on their desk. Gross me out!!!

Posted by: PoeticaL at June 27, 2006 12:45 PM

Ah yes, the infamous lack of hand washing co-worker. I'm still puzzled by those actions of co-workers in the bathroms. It sure gives me a different outlook on their character when they pull that stunt...eck!

Becareful for the dangerous pee puddle, those things are a lawsuit waiting to happen for any company!

Posted by: E at June 27, 2006 12:52 PM

Two words: Eye Contact. And one more word: "Hi!" That's not actually three words. You don't say eye contact. Sheesh. Do I hafta draw you a picture?

Posted by: bhd at June 27, 2006 01:13 PM

I don't understand why you have to talk to them. If you're walking in opposite directions you just smile and/or nod and keep going.

The real question is how to get around the ass that sees you going toward the restroom and still wants to stop you to ask, "Did you get the email I sent you regarding XYZ?" Seriously? You need to know right now?

Posted by: Lily at June 27, 2006 01:13 PM

I'm with the masses of just smile keep walking. Maybe a "Hey."

I feel slighted, we don't have a sitting area... but man those ping-pong games can get pretty intense. Sometimes, the sing-a-longs get so loud, that you get distracted and miss your return.

BTW... those stalls are pretty narrow. Guess we'd have to just back right in there to go, cause there's no room to turn around. Especially if our rears are as big as those chairs.

Posted by: Karen at June 27, 2006 01:17 PM

Chris, I agree with Emily--I would not think you were a perv and trying to peek into the ladies' room at all. You are just a considerate person who takes great pains not to offend people (don't try to hide it...) which is greatly appreciated. So, I choose (b). Don't ever consider backtracking with diapers---a very messy (and smelly option). And then wouldn't people wonder why YOU never used the facilities again? That would bring a whole other level of scrutiny about, my friend. And besides, you KNOW you want to be the official Office Perv, admit it!!!!

Posted by: Michelle at June 27, 2006 01:32 PM

Smile and nod. Don't speak because I'm already embarrassed that you know I'm going to hike up my skirt and squat over a pot.

And ping pong?? I don't think so. How about a plasma tv with a soothing image of a white sand beach and crystal blue water?

Posted by: Betty at June 27, 2006 01:32 PM

You crack me up! I really dig the piano idea, being a singer and all. I'd probably never leave! lol

Posted by: Mary at June 27, 2006 01:34 PM

64 comments! Geesh. Is it even worth saying anything?

That diagram is ridiculous Chris. Where's the TV playing nonstop soaps? Or the juice bar?

Here are some things you could say:

"Hope everything came out OK!"
"Remember, front to back. Never back to front."
"Ooo! I think my eyeballs are floating."
"I'm going to be awhile. Just yell through the walls if you need me."

Posted by: Tink at June 27, 2006 01:42 PM

When's someone's coming out of the ladies room (whom we presume is a female) she really doesn't have too much to say. (What are you going to chat about? Soap dispensers?) Nor does she want to to smile a gleaming smile, because what are you? Perverted? Are you grinning because she tucked her skirt into her underwear? No, when you pass someone coming out of the ladies room: smile (closed-lipped), make brief eye contact, possibly throw in a head toss as a silent hello. No more, no less. This will get you safely on your way.

Posted by: Sheryl at June 27, 2006 01:44 PM

I usually start with;

"#1 or #2?"
or simply,
"What up YO?!", whilst flashing the horns.

Did you see that I used 'whilst'.

Posted by: chantel at June 27, 2006 01:52 PM

I'd yell "Oh good you didn't fall in!" :)

PS Some men's rooms are designed well so that when the door opens you see the sinks and not the urinals... others? not so much.

Posted by: Laura at June 27, 2006 02:29 PM

Not ONLY did you arbitrarily give the men more sinks, but you also made the cardinal error of neglecting the solid gold fountain of chocolate and male underwear models in the women's bathroom.

I think a nod would suffice. DO NOT attempt to shake hands.

Posted by: Gavin at June 27, 2006 03:47 PM

I think it's probably the diagram causing people to flee your presence rather than the use of 'whom'. Just, you know, FYI. ;-P

Posted by: Polichick at June 27, 2006 03:53 PM

I always feel so silly when I'm late getting here, and like the millionth (ha! not a word at ALL.) commenter, because I'm just being ridiculously redundant by saying, "Smile and nod."

Posted by: Heather at June 27, 2006 05:52 PM

do not make long conversation, whatever you do ---- they probably have to go as badly as you do and won't be rude and just ditch you and then you will both be stuck outside the doors doing an awkward version of the pee dance, and that would just be wrong

my method is just to ignore the fact that ANYONE actually has to use the bathroom, ergo no conversation or acknowledgemnt necessary

Posted by: Kathryn at June 27, 2006 06:00 PM

Oh shit, a diagram and a multipal choice list all in one post. You must really be desperate.

Just so you know, everyone finds this uncomfortable. Just nod or say hello and move on.

Posted by: Melissa at June 27, 2006 06:13 PM

Just smile and be heartened that in addition to the ping pong table we have pinball machines in our restroom.

Posted by: Heather at June 27, 2006 06:39 PM

Smile and nod, then run!

Posted by: Colleen at June 27, 2006 08:04 PM

You changed your pic and some of your side bar stuff. Way Cool. LOVE the photo.

As for the bathroom thing... Smile and nod?

Posted by: Lisa B at June 27, 2006 08:56 PM

I say to just give a wave or hello and move on. Now if you saw Tom Cruise in the ladies room that is a different story. I would start jumping up and down on the sofa in the said room and babble like an idiot.

Posted by: Dennis at June 27, 2006 10:33 PM

Well my husband was reading over my shoulder and he said what he would do is .....Leave your fly open when you come out of the restroom, ladies tend to see that and look away, kinda leaves them speechless.. so now you don't have to make any "small talk" with them. voila!(keep in mind that it was not my idea). Hope you have a terrific Hump day!

Posted by: Jennifer at June 28, 2006 12:01 AM

Lol! Great question. I'd say try to act as normally as possible. And don't do anything freaky, like a bouncy tippy-toe walk, while you're greeting the woman in front of the open ladies-room door.

I always found it weird greeting men when they went into or out of the washroom at the office. You know--because they're about to touch, or have just touched, themselves--at work. It's just a bit weird and awkward if you think too much on it....

Posted by: Haley-O at June 28, 2006 12:02 AM

Time to put a milk jug in the desk drawer.

Posted by: Chag at June 28, 2006 12:03 AM

diapers, definitely...

Posted by: Amy at June 28, 2006 12:20 AM

*giggle* You have the most amusing readers!

A smile and nod is cool.

I have a bladder problem and I hate knowing that the same person keeps seeing me running back and forth to the "facilities"--they must certainly be thinking, "OMG, AGAIN?!"

As for the diagram, the ladies room should always have a pantry of products.

Posted by: kristen at June 28, 2006 06:59 AM

Just do what all the people here in my building do, talk on your cell phone. Put it up to your ear as you walk to the bathroom, speak even louder when you enter the restroom to make your presence known, and continue to talk while peeing, washing your hands, and leaving. At least now, you wont have to talk to anyone else...because you know...that call is too important to actually hang up and pee alone.

Posted by: Nik at June 28, 2006 12:03 PM

I'm still not over the awesomeness of the diagram. It made my day yesterday, and it's making it again today!

Posted by: Vaguely Urban at June 28, 2006 12:08 PM

I am so glad someone is talking about this. I freak out everytime I go to the restroom and pass a guy coming out!!! It's horrible. I never know what to do.

I say to just keep your head down and keep walking!

Posted by: Isabel at June 28, 2006 01:21 PM

Acknowledge, but don't overacknowledge. I give departing bathroomers the eyes-with-a-smile, or the face-raise acknowledgement.

Give the look that says, "Yep, I'm going to be viewing and touching my penis soon, and I don't want to talk about it."

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