August 02, 2006
What Not To Hair
I can never be accused of being less than forthcoming with you guys. I share a lot of myself and I've never shied away from throwing myself under the bus for your entertainment value. It's in that spirit that I'd like to reveal something to you I've never shared before. Yes. You guessed it. Your dreams have been answered. Allow me to introduce you to...my mullet.
Yeah. That's hott
with the extra t
. And I'm sure no one would blame you if you wanted to throw a third t
Aside: Damn. What the fuck was I thinking? 1991-92 was apparently a weird time for me. Note the extra-large hoop earring too. It's as if I was trying to dress the part of a hockey playing bemulleted pirate...or something. Please don't think less of me.
Posted by Chris at August 2, 2006 06:48 AM
Dude. Just... Dude. The mullet is very scary.
Oh wow. wow, wow, wow.
But back in 91-92, I was so way INTO the hockey mullet. Did you wear Z. Cavaricci pants?
Ahem . . . a table for two, please? LOL!
Hey, let he who has never had a mullet throw the first stone, I always say.
That is an uber-mullet, dude. It's not even trying to be anything else. Whoo.
and bangs! if i didn't have an equally bad photo of myself around that time i'd make more fun of you but seriously, we were all on crack in our teens i think.
Dude, that look is still alive and well on the heads of many here in Canada. Your youthful self would fit in here just fine.
You've gone wrong... But you clearly had attitude.
I needed a good laugh this morning. Thanks, Chris!
OMG!!!!!!! I have a picture of my husband that looks JUST LIKE THAT... his Mom gave it to me AFTER we got married...
What was it with guys in the early 90's? Its almost as bad as "Mall Girls" with the koosh balls on the front of their heads (high bangs)
Wow, and you had such potential. ;)
Nice! It looks like you took a lot of time styling it just right that morning for the photo.
My senior portrait from '92 is just as bad, with poufy bangs and a perm. Not that it's a bad picture, just...what were we thinking???
My Eyes....MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyone that rips on you for your mullet is a total liar. Everyone had one. Or at least a rat tail. And we all thought they were cool as hell.
But I think we need to draw attention to your PERFECT eyebrows! No teenager has eyebrows that perfect! Were you waxing? Come on, you can tell us. It's only the Internet... who are we gonna tell?
Nice, business in the front, party in the back. I'm speechless, thats just awesome!
Mullet + tux? Brain cannot comprehend. I thought mullets only went with ripped sleeveless flannel shirts and dirty jeans. And work boots. I guess I was wrong!
We forgive you though. It's been a long time.
No worries, Chris - I have photos of me at that time with teased bangs so high, a bird could've nested in them and I'd have never known.
#1 - What's up the tux? Was the mullet your prom date b/c it definitely is in a class of its own!! I think "E" said it best - "Business in the front, party in the back". Wow. Just wow. And it looks uber sweet, you must have taken a good amount of time getting it to do that bang stuff in the front. Simply amazing.
Wow. *gazes in awe* I'm just so amazed that I had to leave another comment. That is something you should defintiely sport at the office. It would take care of that too many meeting crap in no time flat.
At least it's not the super-d-duper cool bowl cut that guys had later in the mid-90's... although, hmmm... that's a pretty rockin' mullet. Wow... Did you have the mullet when you met Beth?!?! Because, you're one lucky fella if you did... hehehe
Oh ... oh man. W.O.W. I just died and went to heaven, I think. Those are some damn pretty eyebrows. And I love the 40-yard stare. Hottt (note the third "T").
gadamn young man!
I can't really judge, because I was recovering from a Wierd Al perm in 1991 . . .
Can't. Stop. Laughing. *deep breath There. I think I'm ok now. ;) Love you too much to judge you by your mullet. Hell I married a man whose mullet in 1991 was stunningly like yours, only with curly hair. *shudder
Thanks for sharing!! Maybe I'll post my 1989 big hair, blue eyeliner wearing self!
i cannot ridicule, because I too once sported a mullet. Granted I was 9 and it was the 80s and my parents still had the most say when it came to what the hairdresser did, but still, there is photographic proof of my mullet days too...
Haaaa! Okay, sorry. I shouldn't have laughed. But I do laugh at the picture of my husband from when he had a mullet. But his was spiked on top. It's hillarious. If I ever get my hands on it (it's framed at his grandma's house, otherwise it would be mine) it's so going up on the internet faster than you can say "Business up front, party in the rear".
I really do not have a comment I just wanted to acknowledge that I saw this picture.
You look like every guy in my brother's graduating class! I mean, my brother even rocked a mini-mullet for a while. If I showed everyone my class picture from that time period, no one would be my friend anymore. Helloooooo awkward puberty phase! Which stayed with me until well into college.
But major props to you for being a brave soul. After careful consideration, I've decided I can still be your friend.
Just don't grow that mullet back.
Dude, what bet did you lose to post that ?
Just kidding, what cute kid even with the mullet(just don't ever grow it back).
We're not laughing AT you...we're laughing WITH you.
we're laughing with him? really?? 'cause i am so totally laughing AT him!!!
OMG that was the best laugh i've had all week!
thank you chris, thank you so very, very much *grin*
OMG! Somebody help me! My freaking eyeballs are on fire!
Forgive me for laughing so hard at that. But yeah, I had one too... it was temporal insanity.
Now I have to find someone new to star in my fantasies...damn you!
Is this in keeping with your neighborhood freaks post????
And I am so laughing over the "business up front, party in the rear" comment - hysterical.
OMG! Thank you. That is classic. Sooooo horrible. Hell, I think you just made my day. ;-)
I'm guessing you had the accompanying tank top, acid wash jeans, and black reeboks to go along with it.
Whoa. How on earth do I comment on that? How brave you are posting that. I would have ripped it to shreds and flushed it down the oilet!
OK, Toilet - my t isn't working well on my keyboard.
OH MY GOD. That's it. Those are all the words I can muster up to explain this hair.
...Ok, I'm done.
...Actually, no I'm not.
HAHAHAHA...can't...type...laughing too hard...in floor....send help...HAHAHAHAHA......
HAHAHAHA...can't...type...laughing too hard...fell in floor....send help...HAHAHAHAHA......
Oops. Sorry about that double post. Thought I was quick enough. Ok, one more...HA!
In your defense, the mullet wasn't exactly out of fashion in 1991-1992 so you know, I don't judge. I had big hair in my senior picture along with the brown dress with white polka dots, a la Julia Roberts at a polo match in Pretty Woman. What could we do? It was the style then.
Thanks for the chuckle, I really needed it this morning! I've destroyed my own bad hair photos, so I can't share them with the world :)
Hee! I believe you mentioned the mullet to me at one point, but to actually see you in your bemulleted glory is priceless.
You are not alone. I did not have a mullet in 1992, but I did have a really short bob that was shaved in the back. Instead of a sexy college girl, which is what I think I was going for, I looked like a boy.
Oh my God! O H M Y G O D!!! The hickey on the forehead was funny, but this is fucking hilarious!!!!
That was '92? It looks more like a mid 80's Duran Duran thing... The Reflex... flex flex flex flex flex....
Oh no... high school flashbacks. I think most of us who graduated from high school back then have similar hair disasters lurking in their past. I, for one, had mall bangs.
That is a very hottt mullet, though. Thanks for sharing!
Awesome! Love this photo. Can't be any worse than the "wave" hair that most of the girls in my class had.
Do you still wear an earring?
Thanks for sharing.
Oh. My. God.
I am so grateful not to have a working scanner.
I agree! I think Chris may miss the WTF.. :)
At least it was THEN, when it was popular..
My cousin's kid is 10.. poor kid.. his blonde Mullet reaches his butt. We've nicknamed him Joe Dirt.. of course.. :)
did you have a rusted out pick-up with no back gate and a dog named bubba? too funny!!! then again i think all of us from that generation sported a mullet for a bit of time. hahaha great pic!
Ugh! Were you and Beth trying to outgross each other with your tales of Past Hairdos?
This wins! This wins! But, I should add, your hair does seem expertly brushed at least. And very shiny and healthy.
he he (done in my very best simpsons voice, of course) that's too funny.
and i have to agree...there are far too many canadian men who still try to get away with this look.
Oh my god, thank you Chris. I needed that laugh.
Hahaha! I don't know what to say...
Oh come on....don't be modest. Your hair deserves at least 4 extra Ts ;). I think we should all take your lead and post old pictures of ourselves. You can never have enough huge bangs and mullets on the internet, can you?
I believe my class picture from 1991/92 involved a spiral perm (including the bangs) and a beflowered jumpsuit with Hammer pants. By comparison, I think yours really is hottt.
It's so nicely styled! Business in the front, Party in the back baby!!!!
It's so nicely styled! Business in the front, Party in the back baby!!!!
ok - I noticed the eyebrows too!! Damn hottt! Hee! That was brave... I think I have buried all of my hair disasters - though most of mine came in law school when I was working 40+ hours/week and doing the law school thing at night so I thought a perm was the solution to carving an hour out of my days. Why didn't anyone tell me I should have fired my salon? Hmm? Some friends.
Oh. Oh my. Wow. That being said...you still look hottt. I would never post a picture of me from 1991-92. Oh lord no way.
One of the theatres I worked for had a mullet photo contest within the staff and actors. MAN that was good stuff. This one would have made the top ten, easy.
Me from 1992? BIG HAIR. So not pretty.
Is that your senior picture? You wore a TUX in your senior picture?! What were you, some kind of geek or something?
Yeah, the mullet rocks, but I can't get past that tux...
OK, let me regroup. Whew. Ok.
That is SO AWESOME. I bet you were the prettiest boy in the senior class! So did you use gel or hairspray that day? No wait, I know....Mousse! And as for that earring...ARGH!
That being said, we all have those moments in our past which we wish weren't captured for all enternity, but most of us don't have the balls to post them for the world to see. You rawk!
Now that's what I call a welcome home!
seriously...can't. stop. laughing. My stomach hurts now....
oh my god... that is priceless. i'm stunned. i don't know what to say. i wonder if i can find a picture of me with my hair feathered. if i can, i'll have to post it on my blog. because i want to give my readers as much joy as you have today.
Awesome! I love it. Classic 91/92!
Makes me think back to the day I got my senior pictures back (Class of 91) and I remember thinking 'Aw, my hair was too flat' and now I look at it and think 'How is 3 inch tall permed (then curled again) hair too flat?'
What a brave, brave man you are. :)
At least you weren't sporting the Flock of Seagulls look...
You are a brave, brave man. I commend you for sharing. I, however, am not nearly brave enough to even know where I've hidden my yearbook photo with the really bad asymmetrical cut from the late '80s. It's actually physically painful even to remember the picture, much less look at it. Ugh.
Oh my God. Just. Oh. Um? Dude. WOW.
My entire office is gathering around me now, checking out your mullet.
BTW - Kudos to you. You have some brass balls putting this on the internet, by the way.
I originally read the title as "What Not to NAIR". Entirely different subject matter...hmmmm...
P.S. The mullet? Still enjoying a high level of popularity in Southern Maryland and the Eastern Shore. Scary!
at least you're not requiring us to post our senior pics. OH MY is all I can say. 80's hair, blue eye shadow. Yeah. Thing of it is, in 20 years we'll look back at photos of us now and say, "What were we thinking?!"
Seriously, that mullet looks like it has a spinal cord and a central nervous system. And I also like how the color accentuates the sweep-the-leg-Jhonny expression you have on your face.
2 thumbs up, Chris.
no matter what anyone thinks of the style, you are the bravest person I know to even post this photo.
Diet. Coke. All. Over. Screen.
Great, I just cleaned my keyboard and now it is covered in soda again.
I would show a pic of myself during my hair days but then I would have to kill everyone who looked at it in order to avoid the embarassment.
Holy cow, man. Where did you grow up where this was allowed?
JK. Actually, I've got one in my repetoire as well.
That is AWESOME to say the least.
Oh man. Too funny!
A cousin of mine finally cut the back of his mullet about two years ago. They took photos. There was an email that sent to all his friends and family. It was a big thing.
Wow. I remember mullets. I can't really say much, I graduated in '83. Can you say big hair? So, were you doing the sun in to get the blonde look?
CD should be in the mail by the end of the week... hopefully tomorrow. :)
Ohhhh myyyy! I think my retinas are burnt! Just goes to show that men do get better with age.
PS. I think I might get fired for laughing too hard...lol
Wow. Tim Curry's love child, are you?
OMG---you could go on the road with Billy Ray Cyrus!
I can tell by the number of comments that you have completely shocked the shit out of the internet too!!
Kudos to your braveness for posting (and no doubt wearing!) that picture. Those are some killer brows. Were you getting them done?
also? I am so glad there were no mullets at USC that year. that was my senior year and it is mullet free thank God for the preppies!
We're sorry too. If I find it - I'll post mine.
ROFLMAO...and yes it's at you.
Of course, by the 90's I was a cool college student and way past the mullet stage...mine was in the early-80's and I permed the back only! Oh yeah, I'm proud! ...not so proud that I'd show you a picture of it, but proud nonetheless.
The mullet? Very "rad" but I just want to know why you're in a tux.
Oh dear LORD.
You can be forgiven, though. It was the early 90s. We were still reeling from the 80s, wonderful as they were, and 1999 (and the partying like it's) was only a few years away.
that is the most perfectly groomed mullet i've ever seen.
that's not just Hottt. that's Rad.
Holy shit! I haven't laughed so hard in ages! What were you thinking?? I didn't even realize they still had mullets in the early '90s. I remember that as such a mid-80s thing.
Woho - Look at how many comments there are on your mullet. I just wanted to add mine and a belated Happy Birthday to Mia.
Oh, my. I trust you've mostly come to your senses, though not entirely or you would have burned the evidence.
Classic! Thanks for sharing.
Ah man that is so dope! Did you cut if off and leave a tail?
WOW. How long did it take for you to arrange all those hairs on the top in front so they were *just right*??!??!
And? I think maybe you went to my high school... or at least your hair did.
OK, I literally laughed out loud when I saw this. The feathering up front is so perfect - it must have taken a bunch of time to get just right!
My senior picture from 1992 is laughable too, don't worry. And the guys in my class? Pretty much the same hair style that you're sporting here.
Also known as Business in the front, Party in the back. May also be called a Tennesee Waterfall. Rarely spotted in the wild, there are several specimens to be found captive in trailer parks.
"Yeehaw! Chris that's the biggest mullet I've ever seen!"
ROCK ON!!! Joe Dirt has nothin on that.
I could never think less of you;) In fact, it may sound weird but the mullet is a reminder of a few good years (what seems like forever ago).
I have pictures with my hair standing up three feet. OMG its just scary. I have to see if I can find a few to humiliate myself with ;)
First of all, there are 111 comments before me--everything has been said about that hair cut.
Second, I honor you--thank you for sharing that with us all.
I think in Glamour magazine you'd be what they refer to as a fashion "don't"...but hott none-the-less!
why why why did I put off blogging for late evening? Why? (&$(@(*&@ I'm mad at myself now. This would have caused my morning to be far more entertaining...now I have so few hours to hit "refresh" and giggle.
p.s. I met my first husband in 91 and he immediately tagged my "giant stick up in the air bangs" with the nickname "Shark Fin". Long live mullets and shark fins!!
Heeeeee heeeeeee heeeeeeeee! It's so perfectly coiffed, too! :)
Damn, you look so serious. I bet you're wearing a wife beater under that shirt and its dirty?
You look like all my small-town Canadian tight-jeaned hockey-haired boyfriends, but with a certain...je ne sais quois.
Super sweet ride. I hereby like your blog even more.
Oh. my. lord.
I go away for a while and this is what I return to?!?! Horrors!
I totally dig the manicured eyebrows, by the way. Did your stylist do them too?
I'm back to ask if you could please add that to the lovely display of photos in your banner thingy? It's just too priceless (or "wicked cool") to only display once.
What a sweet sweet mullet.
You really have changed a lot! Wow.
I miss 1 day and I miss the mullet! That will teach me a lesson.
wow. all I can say is wow.
YOu got some nice feathering action there.
You should have held a contest to create the best caption for this pic. Could have been quite interesting. heehee.
GODDAMMIT, Chris. Do NOT do that to me while I'm drinking Pepsi.
My favorite euphemism for the mullet is "the ape drape."
Mate, it was a millennium mullet before it's time.
Damn. That was meant to be an "its." Next time I act like a smart-arse I'll be sure to proofread...
OMG! that is freakin hilarious! i have only turned on my computer once in the last 3 days because it's 8 gajillion fucking degrees here in NYC and your mullet was one of the first things i saw. awesome!
mama like.. oh yes, mama like.
that is AWESOME! thank you for posting that!
No f-ing way!!! And, did you put hairspray in it? There's like not a hair out of place!
Seven words....Spiral perm, big bangs, lotta hair spray.
Yep that was me from about 1989 to 1995. Oye.
Now jump to 2006, hair all one length, bangs grown out, hair sorta naturally wavy (go figure), and quite a bit of gray hair (s) mixed in. That is a good pic of you tho...you would have fit right in at my highschool in Idaho.
HAHHAHAHAHA! How did I miss this?!
If it makes you feel better, the first thing I laug...er... noticed was the bangs. BANGS!
Half of my graduating class had a mullet. They basically looked like clones of you. I somehow escaped this shameful stage, but I did manage to pair pegged jeans with a cardigan and a turtle neck and go through an entire bottle of Dep gel within a week. Alas...
Sad thing about your pic? In 1992, you were completely normal.
Let me correct my previous comment by saying in 1992 your mullet was completely normal. You probably did not look out of place in your high shcool yearbook (or any high school yearbook back then).
My mom once encouraged me junior year to grow a mullet. I told her no. She said but everyone was doing it. So I rebelled against her by not growing one. I come from a not normal Pakistani family.
Ha! That is an intense mullet.